Manolo says, No, no, Paris Hilton. This is Halloween, when you are supposed to dress the opposite of how you really are.
But, special props for getting Don King as your date.
Geez, what’s a girl gotta do to get some soft lighting and hand cream around here?
“How about them Cowboys then? Defense isn’t as good as it used to be,” squeaked David gruffly to his drinking buddies as he swaggered off to the beer cooler to retrieve his specially formulated herbal eye serum and gently pat a small amount on his delicate under-eye area, for he had read in one of Victoria’s magazines that applying it cold worked wonders for puffiness and dark circles. And really he felt that he could do with using less concealer ever since he started hanging out with the lumberjack crowd .
In Taiwan, there is no such thing as too much plastic.
Manolo says, featuring the highest Bollywood production values and the most amusing lyrics you will ever see.
Oh, to be a well-coiffed little boy on his regular morning tow around the block with his supermodel mum, blissfully unaware of the real-life drama that is brewing around his very existence:
Despite the fact that Linda Evangelista’s reps continue to deny it, Page Six is still insisting that Francois-Henri Pinault is the father of the supermodel’s one-year-old son, Augustin. Francois-Henri is also the confirmed father of fiancee Salma Hayek’s daughter, Valentina. Page Six spoke to Salma’s peeps, and word is she’s still planning to wed the mega-billionaire, despite any possible dalliance with Linda. For her part, Linda remains mum on the whole daddy issue.
Please let this rumour be true, if only because Linda (the captivating blonde) and Salma (the captivating, feisty brunette) have given their kids Augustin James and Valentina Paloma such glamourous soap-opera worthy names. Who will rise to power in the Pinault clan and who will fall out of favour and be unceremoniously stripped of their unlimited tab with Gucci and friends? This saga of the rich and famous will have you riveted to your supermarket tabloids!
I foresee there will be grand entrances in dark sunglasses and a veiled hat, at least one dramatic “I OBJECT to this wedding!” moment, campy Alexander McQueen ensembles, UFOs and gun-toting revolutionaries. Best of all, I guarantee that somebody is going to end up in the lily pond!
I wonder what Tara Reid is doing for Halloween?
PLUMCAKE: You know an outfit is bad when your first thought is, “Is Jodie Foster doing a line for the softer side of Sears?”
SPIRIT FINGERS: There’s a site where you can submit these sort of pics. I think it’s called womenwhodresslikeoldanchormen.blogspot.com
MANOLO: Somewhere, Sappho is weeping.
And the people are…
Catherine Zeta-Jones messy, still hotter than anyone you know (DanasDirt)
Trista Sutter, celebrity mom, self-hating whale (TeenyManolo)
Pete Doherty dumps Irina Lazareanu, targets Kate Moss (TheRadReport)
Scarlett Johansson gives away body parts to her men (CelebWarship)
Amy Winehouse won’t get sloshed before concerts, unlike the audience (WendyWayrad)
Katie Holmes, bastard spawn of Tinkerbell and Godzilla (GoFugYourself)
Ashley Olsen’s Donald Duck impression (ImNotObsessed)
Owen Wilson interview goes live at the witching hour (EvilBeet)
Cindy Crawford, serial sellout (DerekHail)
Natalie Portman, nude no more! (DailyStab)
Renee Zellweger rocks the inpatient look (CelebrityDirtyLaundry)
Britney Spears carrys drugs in her purse (HollywoodBackwash)
Japan makes Posh Spice smile (Glosslip)
Jessica Biel pulls a Britney Spears move, attacks with brolly (CelebSlam)
Keanu Reeves, 43, has girlfriend, 20 (GabbyBabble)
Borat sued for making etiquette expert look uptight. Whodathunkit? (HolyCandy)
Britney’s hit and run charge dismissed, DWL sticks (PopOnThePop)
Beyonce is your fat aunt (Fatback)
The Unsexiest Women: the blowback (2BlogOrNot2Blog)
Paris Hilton not to molest Rwanda just yet (Oscar Valdez)
One stands accused of playing pass the mutt, the other readily admits to playing pass the butt.
“Hang on guys, let me get my girlfriend Vanessa Hudgens so she can be in the picture too. I promise she’ll keep her clothes on.”
“Please Zac, drop the act - your relationship is as fake as my luscious, manly weave.”
“OK maybe….but not as fake as Janet’s face, chest, stomach and ass!”
“Damn straight, girly-boy. Now everybody relax, don’t stare straight into the camera and look as natural as possible!”
may include nausea, headache, restlessness and a bitchin’ side part.
