Ayyyy!

The days of pink diamond rings the size of my head and gold-plated toilet seats are far behind Ben Affleck, now that he has become fixated on achieving his directorial vision through frugal means. No sirree, there’ll be no Waterworld type budget-blowouts for this actor-director.

BEN AFFLECK was so determined to keep costs down on the set of his feature film directorial debut GONE BABY GONE, he refused to use extras in bar and street scenes. Instead, the canny actor/director gave Boston, Massachusetts locals the chance to become film stars for the day. He explains, “Basically, what we did was, wherever possible, we went down to locations - say we shot in a bar - and we basically said, `Whoever’s at your barstool, we’re gonna show up and make the movie, stay where you are. We’re gonna make the movie around you.’

At home the situation is pretty much the same.  If he hadn’t won the three wheel stroller in a poker game, little Violet would still be trundling around in a supermarket trolley.

And yet, still not half as terrifying as Dakota Fanning on a cute day.

Sorry, it was there. I had to use it.

Larry Craig and the Village People get their groove on! (Disembedded)

Celebrities love Mr. Bones (Jezebel)

Life after Xena for Lucy Lawless (AgentBedhead)

LiLo’s new BF jilted his fiance for her (with bonus mug shot goodness) (CelebritySmack)

Pamela Anderson as: Hooker Bride Barbie! (DailyStab)

Colin Farrell and Natalie Portman do good (GlitteratiGossip)

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, not so good (GoFugYourself)

Donald Trump disses George Clooney and Angelina Jolie. Start the countdown to the assassination (HolyCandy)

LAPD investigates Orlando Bloom’s car crash (I’mNotObsessed)

Raising Suri Cruise by the book: Dianetics (CelebrityDirtyLaundry)

Michael Jackson on Kid Nation? Uh, so to speak. (JustJared)

Hayden Panettiere and Milo Ventimiglia not dating (OK)

Victoria Beckham cracks a smile (PerezHilton)

Kate Moss debuts her Joan Collins tribute collection (MollyGood)

Taye Diggs hotter even when goofy than any man you know (PopSugar)

Ellen DeGeneris releases the hounds (TMZ)

Kimora Lee Simmons, Russell Simmons, their kids, and Djimon Hounsou at the Pumpkin Patch (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Paris Hilton dumps another one (TheRadReport)

Celebrities cheat on their taxes too! (TheJellyfisher)

Debra Messing’s got a new job (Seriously?OMG!WTF?)

This is not good. Not good at all.

Now that Sienna Miller has been snapped sporting the morning-after look, every woman’s magazine, every fashion store, every style observer, every person who’s ever professed even the slightest of interest in their appearance is going to be jumping on the bandwagon. This could very well prove to be our darkest winter yet.

Everytime Michelle Rodriguez hits the clubs and springs headlong into a vodka haze, she faces that age old dilemma of deciding between her two most trusted counsellors.

You’d think she would have figured out by now that she could easily avoid doing time in the county jail by just ignoring that voice by her right shoulder saying it’s perfectly ok to drive.

but now what excuse will you have for not getting little Cruz that Red Ryder BB Gun he’s always wanted?

Amy Winehouse scalps Romanian orphans (AgentBedhead)

Steve-O for PETA, animal magnetism (CelebritySmack)

Lonelygirl15 @ Pinkberry, Beverley Hills (CelebrityPuke)

Ann Coulter, 46, hacked (DListed)

Stephen Colbert is running for President (EvilBeet)

Diddy, P.Diddy, Puff Daddy, all to be charged with assault (GabbyBabble)

Ellen DeGeneres has a puppy-themed meltdown (Defamer)

JK Rowling bra not-so-much-slip-as-landslide (GoFugYourself)

Jon Voight is heartbroken over Angelina and James (HolyCandy)

Sheryl Crow launches new line (I’mNotObsessed)

LiLo drives the paparazzi wild(er) (PerezHilton)

LOLsen twins (Mollygood)

Jodie Foster will not be contained! (TheMeatScale)

Ebony and Ivory: Mya and Anna Kournikova (YoungBlackAndFabulous)

Spice Girls @ Victoria’s Secret (DailyStab)

Amy Winehouse in the Zoo (Yeeeah)

Manolo says, and in today’s news comes this report about the budding philanthropist, Paris Hilton.

Next month, she flies to Africa with the children’s charity Playing for Good for a five-day humanitarian mission visiting schools and health-care clinics.

The socialite, currently in Toronto shooting a film called “Repo! The Genetic Opera!” in which she plays an heiress addicted to plastic surgery, admits she is worried about the trip.

“I’m scared, yeah. I’ve heard it’s really dangerous,” she tells Newsweek.

“I’ve never been on a trip like this before.”

Unsurprisingly, the visit will be filmed.

“I love having everything documented,” says Hilton, who hopes to turn the footage for a reality show called The Philanthropist that will also feature other celebrities.

The philanthropic celebrity reality show? Pure genius!

Nothing says, “selfless charity” quite like going to Africa with your new best friends, Flavor Flav, Ron Jeremy, and that crazy chick from Survivor.

The sign on the bar said “No shirt, no service.” But what does it matter to someone like Bai Ling anyway? She’s already so intoxicated with the loud, shiny colours of life she can’t even remember a time when People’s Liberation Army-approved neutrals were a part of her wardrobe .

Even though Julia Roberts doesn’t seem to have made a movie in about 10 years, she can still draw the big names to come together and celebrate her wide expanse of toothiness.  As this year’s recipient of the American Cinematheque Award, Julia enjoyed tributes from Tom Hanks, Bruce Willis, Sally Field, Shirley MacLaine, Natalie Portman and director Mike Nichols who basically likened her acting to a severe nauseous experience:

Other speakers included director Mike Nichols, who said watching Julia Roberts is a mixture of falling in love, driving a Ferrari, reading a Yeats poem, and eating a triple-decker ice cream cone.

Touching words no doubt, but for Julia the highlight of the night came when her award was brought up on stage.  Just as the organisers had promised in return for her attendance, she would finally get to walk away with the ultimate prize that is Denzel Washington.

L’Oreal kidnaps most of Scarlett Johanssen’s nose (Scandelerious)

Although she paid someone to take away some of it already  (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

A night of passion with Robbie Williams (AgentBedhead)

Brad Pitt sobers up for the kiddies (CelebritySmack)

Donnie Osmond’s almost drug bust (Starpulse)

Vincent “Vampire” Gallo vould luff to meet chou (GoFugYourself)

Suri Cruise is a two-fisted drinker (HolyCandy)

Jennifer Aniston’s secret wish (I’mNotObsessed)

Colin Farrell discusses his son’s cerebral palsy (ICYDK)

Leo DiCaprio manorexic? (TheSkinny)

Lindsay Lohan, Playboy Bunny possibility? (Egotastic)

Small, bedraggled Olsen creature attends Calvin Klein event (JustJared)

Sienna Miller’s graveyard grope session (TheMeatScale)

Anthony Kiedis joins The Embarrassing Parent Club (TheSuperficial)

Jessica Alba’s hot wheels (CelebrityCarParade)

LiLo is back, beyotches! (CelebrityNation)

Alicia Keys’ wetsuit (YoungBlackAndFabulous)

Oh Rihanna, I am just so perplexed. How could you have ripped off my style? You were just a little girl when I was in 9th grade and saved my babysitting money to sneak-buy that bustier at Victoria’s Secret. I wore it to school all day tucked into my high-waisted acid washed jeans under my Esprit sweat shirt. I’ll admit I didn’t have the fashion-forward instincts to pair it with my meemaw’s beret and a letter opener on a bike chain, but a rip-off is a rip-off and young lady, you’re on notice.

I swear, if I see even the slightest hint of my patented “giant turquoise shoulder padded blazer and white stirrup pant” ensemble that was so popular back in the day, I WILL come after you.