Oh dear, looks like L’il Kim spilt Fake Bake down the front of her dress while rushing to put a golden glow in those surgically enhanced cheeks of hers.  Fortunately it’s for a Sex and the City event, the natural home of loud colour combinations. Hooray for minor tanning accidents and their unintended high-fashion outcomes!

No, no it’s not what you think at all.  Jennifer Hudson isn’t looking for any handouts – in fact with her debut single starting to hit the airwaves, her pecuniary situation should be quite promising in the near future.  It’s merely a delicate balancing act that needs to be performed when there’s a generous bosom and a low-cut dress involved.

Here are the answers to Monday’s puzzle corner:
1. Adrien Brody for Ermenegildo Zegna
2. Jude Law for Dunhill
3. Jonathan Rhys-Meyers for Versace
4. Patrick Dempsey for Versace
5. Brad Pitt for Tag Heuer
6. Ashton Kutcher for Pepe Jeans
7. Clive Owen for Lancome “Hypnose”
8. Ewan McGregor for Davidoff Adventure
9. George Clooney for Nespresso
10. Matthew McConaughey for Dolce and Gabbana “The One”

It was a little bit more difficult than usual, but then again you are a wily bunch who need to be kept on your toes. Congratulations to sara for a notching up a game-winning 6 out of 10! We laud over your erudition in celebrity endorsements. As your reward you may imagine yourself nuzzling against Clive Owen while he whispers key messages about his latest fragrance in your ear.

Paris Hilton has a sad (Lolebrity)

The new cute couple: Johnny Rotten and Britney Spears! (AgentBedhead)

Mars Explorer’s next assignment: Amy Winehouse’s complexion (CelebritySmack)

Colin Farrell suffers acid(wash) overdose (DailyStab)

iPhones? Hamburger phones? Forget it. Pete Wentz has the new hot phone (INFDaily)

Mariah Carey and husband speak eloquently about their love (CandyKirby)

Eva Longoria goes back to her fast-food roots (DListed)

Rachel Bilson should pay some attention to her roots (JustJared)

Shiloh trivia quiz (PopSugar)

Leopard spandex is a privilege, not a right! (CityRag)

Britney is back in the saddle! Or is she the bottom? I forget (ImNotObsessed)

Katie Holmes ditches the old man, flees flies to New York alone (CeleBitchy)

Lindsay Lohan gives Perez the smackdown (EvilBeet)

Who stole Lilo’s boobs? (TheBlemish)

Rooster McConaughey is the Billy Carter to Matthew’s Jimmy (Websters)

Pete Wentz’s stunning new makeover (SeriouslyOMG)

Is Lilo’s lesbo wedding set for Dollywood? (CelebNewsWire)

Is Scarlett Johansson a clone? (Defamer)

SATC premiere madness. You saw the hat: it only gets worse from there (Gawker)

For all her good intentions, Tyra Banks seems to have fallen short on teaching her fledgling charges certain real-life lessons.  Take Jaslene Gonzalez (winner, cycle 8), for example.  Without proper instruction, little does she know that when wearing his favourite negligee, one should wait for their illicit lover up in a hotel room instead of out in the open where his wife can easily recognise last year’s anniversary present.

It’s a lovely colour, but why so droopy Milla Jovovich? Has gravity taken its toll already? Somehow I think the answer has more to do with the crazy carryings-on at those Dolce & Gabbana shindigs. Rumour has it that the evening becomes that much more fun once you let down your hair AND your bustier.

Only because I can’t bear the thought of you chewing your nails and wringing your hands in despair, here are some clues to Monday’s puzzle corner:

1. Four are advertising Italian brands
2. Three are advertising Swiss brands
3. Three are advertising fragrances
4. Two are English, another two are from countries near to England
5. Two have won Oscars
6. Four are married, two have been married once
7. Two are known to be good friends
8. Two have modelled for the same brand

Alanis Morissette’s got a new gig: at Kinko’s (GoFugYourself)

Free Speech wins one for Xenu! (AgentBedhead)

Michelle Williams in Cannes (HollywoodOffender)

Harry Potter actor slain protecting younger brother (CeleBitchy)

Sharon Stone says China had it coming (WWTDD)

RIP Sydney Pollack (Defamer)

RIP Dick Martin, claimed by the Fickle Finger of Fate (Gawker)

Patrick Swayze and Lisa Niemi renew their vows (DailyStab)

Brangelina purchase $60 million Chateau Miraval (DListed)

The Curse of Joey (EvilBeet)

Debbie Gibson channels Charo (CandyKirby)

Samantha Ronson fills Wilmer Valderrama’s “shoes” (ImNotObsessed)

Jared Leto fails to sulk, succeeds in regaining hotness (JustJared)

Britney officially no longer a joke (PinkIsTheNewBlog)

Guess the success of Sex (Mollygood)