Ayyyy!

Seems like Nicole Kidman has graciously passed on the mantle of Most Botoxed Forehead to a lesser celebrity.  It’s so shiny and smooth all the wrinkles slide right off!

As much as Dita von Teese always looks so fabulously well put together, occasionally it borders on being overly prepared. What’s that she’s got stuffed down the front of her dress, do you reckon?  A spare belt in case dessert sends her waistline over the edge and rips the existing belt asunder? A compact folding umbrella in case of a sudden downpour of rain? Or one of those rolls for storing gigantic makeup brushes should there be a need to repaint her face during the night?

Suri has a muneez (Lolebrity)

Richard Simmons is a man’s man (Websters)

Guyliner goes mainstream (AgentBedhead)

Eyeliner works wonders (DailyStab)

Lance Armstrong comes out…of relationship (CelebritySmack)

Janice Dickinson, hot tranny mess (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

Tranny or Trash: YOU decide! (CandyKirby)

Britney’s new friend is hung like a horse (IBBB)

New Trannie Barbies: Xtina and Eva (ImNotObsessed)

Ashley Tisdale trawls for tuna (JustJared)

Paris Hilton, cobbler to the creme de la creme of drag performers (Mollygood)

So then, what does Tony Romo get if he wins MVP? (PopSugar)

NIN, straight up (PinkIsTheNewBlog)

America’s Got Confusion: there are professional Ozzy Osbourne impersonators? (Defamer)

Morrissey invades Israel (Gawker)

____er ____ed for ****ing in ___ (Radar)

Flannel-shirted Miley Cyrus will NOT kiss a girl! (CeleBitchy)

Tom Cruise no longer a mama’s boy? (InTouch)

Amy Winehouse is a vampire (DListed)

Circle yes or no.

The irony, of course, that this guy probably works in tech support.

Another cigarette-holding celebrity but as with the previous post there’s something not quite right here. Smoking cigarettes can kill you, but it shouldn’t turn you into a ghoulish caricature of your former self (well not so soon anyway).  Do you think all cigarette packs need to start carrying a cautionary message such as ”Warning: This Product May Make You Undead”?

Good thing Britney has finally got all those messy custody issues sorted out, so she can go back to spending some quality time with the little ones.  What important piece of parental wisdom is she imparting to her eldest son here?
(a) Now that your motor skills have developed considerably, get used to holding them for me
(b) These are just one of the many wonderful things that you can get hopelessly addicted to!
(c) Now isn’t this more fun than pouring shots for your deadbeat dad?
(d) And when you’ve figured out how to light them without burning the house down, I’ll teach you how to roll your own cigars

Here are the answers to Monday’s puzzle corner:
1. Nicole Kidman
2. Tilda Swinton
3. Julianne Moore
4. Susan Sarandon
5. Marcia Cross
6. Lindsay Lohan
7. Alyson Hannigan
8. Kathy Griffin
9. Reba McEntire
10. Bryce Dallas Howard

Congratulations to Alison for a near perfect score (with kudos to Lauren for working out the elusive no. 10)!  We roundly applaud your seemingly effortless gift for recognising  famous flame-haired females.  As your reward you may don your brightest red hairpiece, maybe throw on some leather too and work it like Tori Amos at a comic convention.

Shaking up the world of advertising with hot British trannies (AgentBedhead)

Great balls of fire! Jerry Lewis is a gun-runner! (CelebritySmack)

Disaster warning: Green Acres, starring Elizabeth Hurley (DailyStab)

It’sCandyTV sends shockwaves through the podcasting industry (CandyKirby)

Volcano Lilo (IBBB)

Twitter rocks the gossip blogging world (ImNotObsessed)

Metaphorical trainwreck alert: Richard Simmons will do Letterman (Mollygood)

Vanity Fair’s Best Dressed list drops; socialites on suicide alert! (PopSugar)

The Godfather takes out a hit on The Dark Knight (Radar)

Fergie launches shoe line, cripples a nation (Websters)

You say “potatoe,” I say “Welcome to Dancing With the Stars” (SeriouslyOMG)

The LA Earthquake news roundup (Defamer)

Royalty rocks the house: Dita von Teese to perform for Prince Harry (CeleBitchy)

I understand that this used to be Joan Van Ark, but alas, no longer. Now it is a desiccated zombie-husk that can only point to what’s written behind it, as if to say “Wouldn’t it be more appropriate, given my current state, if the word was SCREAM instead?” 

I don’t know about this choice of outfit for the premiere about a movie involving pants that magically fit everyone.  All I know is that there’s clearly no magic in these pair of overalls, otherwise they could have hemmed themselves and worked it so there would be way less puckering at the back.

Good news, Naomi Campbell has found a new boyfriend in the form of a tall, mysterious Russian with substantial holdings.  But not for long though, for we’re actually looking at the moment just before her jaw unhinges and she bites the love-smitten billionaire’s head off. No wonder the poor dear’s been so unlucky in love!

L is for LolXena Looking down your shirt (Lolebrity)

V for Vitamins Aren’t Working, Tom (AgentBedhead)

H is for Hospital, which is for Amy Winehouse, stat (CelebritySmack)

B is for … Miley Cyrus! (DailyStab)

L is for Lindsay Lohan (DanasDirt)

D is for DUI for Shia Laboeuf (Defamer)

P is for mystery Passenger (ImNotObsessed)

F is for Maggie Gyllenhaal, Fashion Victim (EvilBeet)

S is for Sternum I’d rather not see (GoFugYourself)

H is for Hungry, and someone get Naomi Campbell a sammich! (CandyKirby)

R is for Roots, proof Marissa Miller isn’t perfect (IBBB)

B is for Bald John Mayer (JustJared)

J is for Jawbone of an ass (Websters)

M is for Manlove for Bob Saget (SeriouslyOMG)

B is for Bilson Bedhead (PopSugar)

F is for French Letters to Miley (Mollygood)

A is for Animals Attacking Celebrities (Gawker)

S is for Shark who can’t seem to swallow (CeleBitchy)

J is for Joker, and also Juvie (DListed)