Ayyyy!

The perfect look for when you stumble out of the day clinic, all hopped up on painkillers - only the best for a recovering plastic surgery patient!

It’s often the everyday things that inspire the most memorable fashion creations – like the sight of a beautifully presented mountain of rainbow-coloured ice cream, after it’s been regurgitated by a greedy, overeating child.

What’s this I hear about a four-day weekend? Outrageous rumours!

Steve Jobs sez: OBITUATE DIFFERENT! (Lolebrity)

The weirdest Japfro you’ll ever see! (CelebuWreck)

Face it: Michael Jackson is 50 (PopEater)

Pamela Anderson is Botox-free (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

Caligula’s horse speaks! (DailyMail)

Tricia Yearwood has instant karma (CelebrityDirt)

When Canadians Attack! Jessica Simpson! (Websters)

The Mandala of Madge’s vadge (CityRag)

Ewan McGregor and Jim Carrey sitting in a tree… (AgentBedhead)

Celebrity Dad Faceoff: Ewan McGregor vs Gavin Rossdale (TeenyManolo)

The Hillary kerfuffle (disembedded)

Obama’s acceptance speech (FoodPlusPolitics)

Jesus appears on an insect! (Membracid)

David Beckham is afraid of turning into Homer Simpson (CeleBitchy)

The 12-step recovery plan for David Duchovny (BestWeekEver)

Aaron Sorkin will Friend you (Valleywag)

The Collected Facebook Status Updates of Aaron Sorkin (Vulture)

Madonna goes Howard Hughes on us (SeriouslyOMG)

Singer’s uncle off to Sing-Sing (ICYDK)

I will NOT use the headline “Sarah Palin tapped by McCain”!!! (CitizenSugar)

Lindsay Lohan takes a shot at the gold medal (HolyMoly)

Carrie Underwood might have to settle for silver (DailyStab)

Jeremy Piven can’t keep a civil tongue in his head (ImNotObsessed)

No, he really can’t: the collected rants of Jeremy Piven (Defamer)

Blind Item Roundup! (Gawker)

Solange Knowles bans the Big B (CelebritySmack)

The Broony Bromance (CandyKirby)

Listen, I have no actual reason to hate Rachael Ray.

In fact, I didn’t even know who she was until maybe two years ago and I was all “who is this woman and why is she on my box of crackers?” So I have no real reason to want to do what I want to do with that microplane zester.

But I do.

I really, really do.

Can you see that by gluing a furry car seat cover to her back, Victoria Beckham is no longer a mere materialistic mortal, but a messenger from above who’s been sent to earth to bestow heavenly floral-oriental scents upon us (with notes of anise flower, candy apple, orchid, heliotrope, vanilla, patchouli, amber and musk)?

Really, it’s almost as bad as saying that because he wears a lot of white and is remarkably good at passing judgment on others, this is the guy who you’ll need to get past when you reach the Pearly Gates. 

By wearing something that recreates the rustle of a crepe pom-pom but evokes elegance in stylish black, Eva Herzigova has become the closest thing there is to a proper cheer squad at the Venice Film Festival.  Truly, I cannot see the others doing flips and cartwheels down the red carpet for fear of chipping their pretty nails. 

I don’t know why they call it the walk of shame – nowadays most young ladies make a pleasant stroll out of it and even offer to sign autographs along the way!

Big local earthquake. I didn’t notice a thing. Story of my life, really.

Russell Crowe makes his move (Lolebrity)

Jim McConaughey takes the Errol Flynn way out (AgentBedhead)

OJ gets his ass kicked (CelebritySmack)

Duff parents (CandyKirby)

SamRo to dish on LiLo yo! (DailyStab)

Cougarfights of 90210 (Defamer)

What Michael Jackson would look like as a man (Gawker)

Horses sweat. Humans perspire. JLo glows (DListed)

Cracking down on Canucks (EvilBeet)

Pigs DO fly! (IBBB)

Tara Reid is not entirely human (GoFugYourself)

Ellen and Portia’s wedding included cavity searches! (JustJared)

Axl and Kelly together forever? (Mollygood)

Your George and Brad unicorn chaser (Websters)

Venice Film Festival: pretty people being professionally pretty (UKPopsugar)

Kate Moss comes to the realization that models are supposed to be thin! (Jossip)