Ayyyy! Fashion Week Abroad

COLOMBIA

MANOLO: For the complete Britney Spears look you must also accessorize with boots and the double-mocha frappuccino.

SPIRIT FINGERS: I’m just glad we never got to see the front-on-getting-out-of-a-car view of this outfit.

PLUMCAKE: Oh as if you’ve never done the same thing in the dress YOU made entirely from Kleenex and cupcake liners.

MANOLO: In architectural terms this is what is known as the “breezeway”.

SPIRIT FINGERS: I read that this is what many drug mules are wearing nowadays. It is easier to retrieve the load, so to speak.

MANOLO: Her to Him, “You want me to touch what? Let me put on my gloves.”

SPIRIT FINGERS: What are the chances those guys are thinking “Yeah, but does she have a wonderful personality?”

PLUMCAKE: About the same chances that we’re looking at the cover shot for the next month’s “sexy back” issue of Carpal Tunnel Monthly.

JAPAN

MANOLO:Ayyyy! It’s the Giant Bib Fairy!

SPIRIT FINGERS: Yeah my mum used to threaten me with that when I was a baby. “Don’t play with your food or the Giant Bib Fairy will send you a whopping laundry bill!”

PLUMCAKE: On the other hand, tests show that Giant Bib Fairy is proven to be up to 99% more absorbent than your regular Giant Fairies.

SPIRIT FINGERS: This being Japan, I bet there’s something much much more perverse going on than a naked woman swathed in soiled babywear. I am totally qualified to make that comment because I visited there, like once.

MANOLO: In Japan you can buy these in vending machines.

SPAIN

MANOLO: Laugh, Clown, Laugh!

PLUMCAKE: Cerulean? They gave me #$%ing cerulean?! That’s it. I am never walking for Crayola Fashion Week again!

SPIRIT FINGERS: Ah well, at least she doesn’t have to worry about finding “something blue” anymore.

TURKEY

MANOLO: Tonight the role of Alexis Morell Carrington Colby Dexter Rowan shall be interpreted by Suzanne Sommers.

SPIRIT FINGERS: With Paris Hilton cameoing as her wayward daughter. Turkish Dynasty – they advertise it as the greatest dynasty since the Ottoman Empire.

PLUMCAKE: And somewhere in Boca Raton, Florida, six members of the world’s first combination mortuary/swinger’s club are trying to figure out what exactly happened in their upholstery dungeon.

SPIRIT FINGERS: Oh you and I both know what exactly happened.