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Courting Dramz

Lindsay Lohan puts her finger on it, or in it

Lindsay Lohan puts her finger on it, or is that in it?

Oh, okay. So this is what people are wearing to their probation hearings these days: Elvira’s old false eyelashes, profane tie-dye manicures, and diamond eternity rings (on THAT finger) from newly-notorious Israeli party girl/soldier BFFs? What’s the point of getting tons of press while you’re cooling your heels in the clink if you’re not Mumia?

In barely-related-but-what-the-heck-I’ll-use-it-anyway news, here is a lovely video of the IDF on maneuvers in Hebron. That’s the IDF: the Israeli Dance Force.

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That’s Pants links

Gwen Stefani is pants

You know, if Gwen Stefani had worn those back when she was still single, she’d still BE single. I mean, Diesel Jeans I know. Depends Jeans are something for which the world as we know it is not yet ready.

Johnny Depp’s awesome flashbacks (Lolebrity)

raincoaster’s emo moment (raincoaster)

That’s his “rainbow face” (Shoeblogs)

Home Depot turns me on (ManoloHome)

Hatch your own commie pinko! (ManoloFood)

World’s ugliest majorette (ManoloBig)

Are you diva enough for this? (ManoloBrides)

New Dad State of Mind (TeenyManolo)

Ebony and Ivory and PDA (AgentBedhead)

From the iPad of the Artist Formerly Known As Sane… (AmyGrindhouse)

…and by “paps” we mean photographers, you pervs! (BusyBeeBlogger)

Elle MacPherson is horny, leathery (CeleBitchy)

The quiff of death (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Oh my god, it’s contagious! (DListed)

Pot informs kettle of its noiritude (HaveUHeard)

World’s craziest grampa (INeedMyFix)

Kelsey Grammer vs Sigmund Freud (SeriouslyOMG)

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Fierce Fashion

That's a punk move

via A, B

What a fashion victim. Yes,  you could say he got Punk’d.

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Bag it!

Canvas "Birkin"

via X Y Z

Looking for a trendy bag on a budget? No need to comb eBay for the now-legally-restricted Jelly Kelly (as I learned from tragic experience, that translucent plastic they’re made of sucks up dirt and will NOT let it go, so they don’t last even if they are totally waterproof). Now you can get your green on and go cheap chic at the same time with these charming, witty, probably illegal 100% canvas Birkin-printed bags. Sadly likely to go off the market soon because Hermes is NOT down with the “right to satire” statutes, and guaranteed NOT to be waterproof, so even in the realm of knockoffs, inferior to the immortal Kelly bag.

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Presented Without Comment: the world’s worst hat

world's worst hat. no arguments!

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Bi-curious?

Today’s trendoid is not complete without a green machine. Which of these designer contraptions will wheel away with your heart?

The economical $3500 Hermes:

bicycle hermes

bicycle hermes

Or what about the veddy, veddy posh $17,000 Chanel (at that price it should come with a decorative manservant to pedal)

bicycle chanelbicycle chanel

bicycle chanel

Or, if geek-flavoured laziness is your thing, how about a nice Chanel Segway?

Chanel Segway

Chanel Segway

Don’t forget the accessories: a stylish helmet and bike clips!

bike helmets I'd actually wear

bike helmets I'd actually wear

Chanel bikecuffs

Chanel bikecuffs

Hey Lindsay, are you thinking what I’m thinking?

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Friday Caption Contest Results: SJP’s Headthing Edition

This one really got you guys going, and no wonder. Isabella Blow wore some crazy stuff in her time, but at least her crazy stuff was interesting or even beautiful as well. This? Well, let’s leave it to the winner to describe it best:

LONDON, ENGLAND - MAY 27: Sarah Jessica Parker attends the UK premiere of Sex And The City 2 at Odeon Leicester Square on May 27, 2010 in London, England. (Photo by Gareth Cattermole/Getty Images)

Mr. Henry Says:
May 30th, 2010 at 10:47 am

The Nebula Galaxy appears to be exerting gravitational pull on a single, fading star.

Simultaneously cruel and elegant. And for Mr. Henry we have this beautiful, imaginary swag: the classic silk/cashmere turtleneck made popular by scientific sex god Carl Sagan! May you live long, and prosper well enough to buy them in every colour!

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RIP Louise Bourgeois

The world has lost not only one of its great sculptors, but one of the last living avatars of those delightfully tarnished angels who used fashion with originality and humour, rather than allowing themselves to be used by it. There’s only Anna Piaggi and Daphne Guinness left now.

Louise Bourgeois

Louise: Say hi to Millicent Rogers and Isabella Blow for us; I’m SURE they’ll be happy to see you.

Louise Bourgeois had a bigger penis than you ever will

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