Ayyyy!

Here are the much-anticipated answers to Monday’s puzzle corner:
1. Tara Reid
2. Vivica Fox
3. Victoria Beckham
4. Janet Jackson
5. Tori Spelling
6. Whitney Houston
7. Ivanka Trump
8. Courtney Love
9. Lil Kim
10. Paula Abdul

A high-scoring game this week and congratulations goes to Jennie for a spectacular 9 out of 10, with kudos to K for identifying the elusive no. 7.  We release thousands of bouncy balloons in salute to your superior knowledge of inferior boobjobs.  As your reward, you may treat yourself to a trip to Germany so that you can watch Brigitte Nielsen undergo breast surgery, among other things, for her latest reality show.

Brace yourselves, for this week’s puzzle corner ain’t a pretty sight.  It is with great perverse pleasure that we bring you a visual buffet of Wonky Celebrity Boobjobs. You know these female celebs by their faces, but how well can you recognise them by their mangled melons?

Answers will be put up on Wednesday morning.  In the meantime I will be down at the bowling alley, crashing those pins with a pair of rock hard implants.

To all our US readers, we hope you have a grand time celebrating this momentous day in the old red, white and blue.  May your nation prosper in many ways, your once mighty greenback soar as high as an eagle on caffeine, and your celebrities continue to entertain us daily with their lack of fashion and common sense.

Here are the answers to Monday’s puzzle corner:
1. Princess Buttercup (Robin Wright, the Princess Bride)
2. Princess Giselle (Amy Adams, Enchanted)
3. Princess Ann (Audrey Hepburn, Roman Holiday)
4. Princess Mia (Anne Hathaway, The Princess Diaries)
5. Princess Leia (Carrie Fisher, Star Wars)
6. Princess Lucilla (Connie Nielsen, Gladiator)
7. Princess Isolde (Sophia Myles, Tristan + Isolde)
8. Princess Danielle (Drew Barrymore, Ever After)
9. Princess Isabelle (Sophie Marceau, Braveheart)
10. Princess Sibylla (Eva Green, Kingdom of Heaven)

Congratulations to Jessica for a majestic 9 out of 10, with kudos to Lunakitsch for identifying the elusive no. 7.  We humbly kneel before your peerless mastery of movie princesses. As your reward you may leave behind your dwarven housemates and ride off into the sunset in the arms of your big-chinned and noble saviour.

This week’s puzzle corner is dedicated to anyone who’s ever wanted to be whisked away in a horse-drawn carriage by their Prince Charming to a five-star castle with all the mod-cons, where you would both live happily ever after, doing meaningful charity work and each other on a regular basis. 

Now that we’re done with daydreaming, we invite you to straighten up your tiara and identify the movie princesses below.   Who are these noblewomen who have lit up the screens with their radiant and fair presence?

Answers will be put up on Wednesday morning.  In the meantime I will be twirling about in my pretty cape and enticing those simple woodland creatures to do my bidding.

Here are the answers to Monday’s puzzle corner:
1. Chris Martin (with his bare hands)
2. Hugh Grant (with lethal tub of baked beans)
3. Kate Moss (with super karate death kick)
4. Britney Spears (with umbrella of vengeance)
5. Jessica Biel (with umbrella of wrath)
6. Justin Timberlake (defending Cameron Diaz’s honour with a smouldering glare)
7. Pete Doherty (with a coked-up guitar)
8. Seal (protecting pregnant Heidi with an expert chokehold)
9. Ryan Philippe (with a half-eaten burger)
10. Sienna Miller (with flying hair and an all-powerful sideswipe)

Congratulations to blaugrau for a masterful 7 out of 10!  We are duly impressed by your mad deductive skills in relation to paparazzi smackdowns.  As your reward you may enjoy this classic footage of Bjork at Bangkok Airport and thank the heavens above you haven’t gotten on her wrong side (yet).

This week we invite you to bring out your most prying set of lenses for the theme of ”When Celebrities Attack!”.   Study the montage below (click for a bigger version) and see if you can guess who these ten paparazzi-pummeling celebrities are.

Answers will be put up on Wednesday morning. In the meantime I will be charging forth at random camera-wielding tourists and bludgeoning them with great gusto.

Here are the answers to this week’s Puzzle Corner:
1. Martin Crane (Frasier)
2. Red Foreman (That 70s Show)
3. Frank Barone (Everybody Loves Raymond)
4. Mike Brady (The Brady Bunch)
5. Howard Cunningham (Happy Days)
6. Heathcliff Huxtable (The Cosby Show)
7. Hal Wilkerson (Malcolm in the Middle)
8. Ignacio Suarez (Ugly Betty)
9. Julius Rock (Everybody Hates Chris)
10. Al Bundy (Married With Children)

Congratulations to LeighB in ATL for a victorious 7 out of 10, followed closely by miss dove and gemdiva. We genuflect deeply before your wise knowledge of paternal tv characters. And just when you thought you’d had enough on the subject, here are some more classic sitcom dads that were thrown into the answer pool.

With Father’s Day having come and gone, we take a moment to reflect on some well-known paternal figures of TV land.  This week your task is to identify the tv characters below, bearing in mind they are all dads on sitcoms and other tv comedies, past and present.

Answers will be put up on Wednesday morning. In the meantime I will be slumped on the couch, dispensing life lessons to the youngsters with a dose of crotchety humour thrown in.

Here are the answers to Monday’s Puzzle corner:
1. The Bodyguard (Whitney Houston)
2. Crossroads (Britney Spears)
3. Employee of the Month (Jessica Simpson)
4. Glitter (Mariah Carey)
5. Shanghai Surprise (Madonna)
6. Gigli (Jennifer Lopez - or is she an actress turned singer?) - I can’t even bring myself to link to a clip from this movie
7. The Pink Panther (Beyonce)
8. Tea With Mussolini (Cher)
9. License to Wed (Mandy Moore)
10. My Blueberry Nights (Norah Jones)

Congratulations to Katyola for a sensational 9 out of 10!  We raise our hands skyward and belt out a soulful tribute to your unique talent.  As your reward you may mambo along with Madonna and her sinewy arms in this fantasy sequence from the much-maligned Swept Away, a movie that is better left in its DVD case and used to prop up wobbling pieces of furniture.

Another Monday, another puzzle corner! This week’s theme is “Songstresses turned Actresses”,  from the truly cringeworthy to the not-bad-at-all. We invite you to study the montage below (click for a bigger version) and identify the movies starring these partially pixelated female singers.

Answers will be put up on Wednesday morning. In the meantime, I will be digging through the bargain basement bin of my local video store where I’m sure many of these movies will be found.

Here are the answers to Monday’s Puzzle Corner:
1. Edie Britt (Nicolette Sheridan), Desperate Housewives
2. Sue Ann Nivens (Betty White), Mary Tyler Moore Show
3. Wilhelmina Slater (Vanessa Williams), Ugly Betty
4. Julie Cooper (Melinda Clarke), The OC
5. Blanche Devereaux (Rue McLanahan), The Golden Girls
6. Amanda Woodward (Heather Lockear), Melrose Place
7. Elaine Vassal (Jane Krakowski), Ally McBeal
8. Samantha Jones (Kim Cattrall), Sex and the City
9. Suzanne Sugarbaker (Delta Burke), Designing Women
10. Alexis Morell Carrington Colby Dexter Rowan (Joan Collins), Dynasty

Congratulations to Carol for a meaty 6 out of 10! We bow before your superior knowledge of the small-screen seductresses. Now ladies (and gents), let’s pour ourselves a drink and enjoy Blanche Devereaux’s performance of “I Wanna Be Loved By You”.