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Beyonce | Ayyyy! - Part 3
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Criminally Good Pomtini Links

Pomtinis count as a serving of fruit, you know. They’re full of antioxidants, so down a couple as you surf the gossip links tonight and work on your alibi.

WiNo-No strikes again? (AmyGrindhouse)

Is someone trying to kill Robert Downey Jr? (SeriouslyOMG)

What does Kate Moss have to do to get arrested in this town? (AgentBedhead)

When Pink finds out, Brandon Davis is gonna need protective custody (CeleBitchy)

William Balfour arrested for Hudson family murders (SocialiteLife)

David Spade needs a good lawyer (Celebslam)

The criminal truth of Tina Fey’s scar (CelebWarship)

Lindsay Lohan = Eddie Gein? (AllieIsWired)

American Express hates America (CelebuWreck)

Immortals team up for concert (CelebritySmack)

Criminal panty lines, Beyonce! (POTP)

Someone wants Simon Cowell bad enough to break the law (GabbyBabble)

Michael Phelps has mastered the George Clooney m. o. (DailyStab)

Lindsay Lohan has a Facebook impersonator: Lindsay Lohan? (EvilBeet)

Liveblogging Fake Karl by Dead Yves (FakeKarl)

False advertising! (CandyKirby)

Fun with Spam (IBBB)

Shia finally makes his Mom happy, becomes a lawyer (JustJared)

Giant douche can’t even manage to shoot himself in the foot (Mollygood)

Some criminal hairdos at the BAFTAs (UKPopsugar)

Save Canada! (OMG)

Marc Jacobs, necrophiliac? (Towleroad)

Your shirtless unicorn chaser (Defamer)

Rob Roy Links

Sure, the Rob Roy is a classic cocktail. Anything good enough to ruin Dorothy Parker’s friends is good enough for me!

$cientology vs Samurai (AgentBedhead)

Meet the $cientology swordsman (Defamer)

Amy Winehouse realizes she can do better (CeleBitchy)

The Britney Circus (CelebritySmack)

Dope elopes (DailyStab)

Neil Patrick Harris is The Naked Man (JustJared)

Beyonce is 180% different from Kanye (CandyKirby)

Gwyneth Paltrow tells you how to run your Thanksgiving (INO)

The Coolest Church on Earth (MollyGood)

Blake, Incarcerated, thinks he’s moving up (Yeeeeah)

Adrien Brody and Beyonce are Cadillacs to everyone else’s Yugos (PopSugar)

David Spade is the patron saint of pulling out of your league (Websters)

 Joey Fatone is awful literal-minded! (SeriouslyOMG)

Mel B is no turkey (EvilBeet)

Britney’s bringing 1998 back (DListed)

Beyonce, finding nail maintenance a hassle

Does anything about me look right?

Yes these robot hands make it impossible to get a decent manicure, but don’t you think that’s the least of her worries in this instance?

Ayyyy! Pop quiz

Beyonce

What is it that ails Beyonce’s corrugated stomach so? Pick the most plausible answer below.
(a) Bad inflight meal from travelling economy class
(b) Butterflies from watching hard-earned investments plunge in recent months
(c) Accidentally being kicked by Katy Perry straddling her giant cherry chapstick 
(d) Sore muscles after a particularly intense abs workout session

Martini Navratalova Links

The Martini Navratilova is perhaps one of the most perfect cocktails ever invented: injury and cure in one, with a dash of wit. Most recipes are a standard mix of classic cocktail ingredients, but my favorite recipe is more basic, as well as more amusing: vodka and Gatorade.

All eyes on Katy Perry (CelebuWreck)

Beyonce stars in Tron 2.0 (DListed)

Gwyneth Paltrow needs to lay off the herbals, eat a sammich (AgentBedhead)

Gee, if these two crazy kids can’t make it as a couple, what hope is there for the rest of us? (CelebritySmack)

Jesse James is an outlaw! (DailyStab)

Cosmetic surgeon saves America! (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

Ellen comes out against Prop 8 (CeleBitchy)

Ode to Papouli (IBBB)

Brother Barack can come out now (Jewcy)

Leo DiCaprio passes the torch to Zac Efron (PopSugar)

Jean-Claude van Damme is back, bitches! (Defamer)

CliffNotes: A Trainwreck Named Winehouse (CandyKirby)

Suri Cruise will stiff the playground valet and he will LIKE it (CelebWarship)

Gwyneth Paltrow attends children’s charity event in a brewery (ImNotObsessed)

The celebrity couple’s in trouble when HIS fashion choices make it into the article (JustJared)

Sloppy Seconds and the City (Mollygood)

Puppycam! (SeriouslyOMG)

Don’t quit your day job, Ashton (Websters)

Tangerine Sidecar Links

Sarah Fawcett-Majors (WOWReport)

Isaac Hayes sticks it to $cientology from beyond the grave (AgentBedhead)

Allegra Versace needs a sammich! (EvilBeet)

America the very attractive in a tight t-shirt (FourFour)

Lord Karl chats with an airconditioning duct (GoFugYourself)

Lily Allen got Grey Goosed (UKPopsugar)

Beyonce is changing her name: to SYBILL (HollywoodBackwash)

Chloe Sevigny rocks the Charlie Chaplin as an Emo Carny look (ImNotObsessed)

Sarah Palin wants a son called Zamboni (Mollygood)

Michael Madsen just overtired, not insane (WizbangPop)

Carrie Underwood and Wax Carrie Underwood both look like Carrie Underwood impersonators (CelebritySmack)

Seth Rogen prefers to be cuddly (DailyStab)

Sulu strikes back at The Shat (Defamer)

Won’t you pray for the marginalized of Hollywood? (Gawker)

The Palin wardrobe through history (DailyBeast)

Celebrity Dad Faceoff: Coleman vs Fairbanks (TeenyManolo)

America’s Next Top Recap (IBBB)

Lindsay Lohan too Ugly for Betty (SeriouslyOMG)

Paris Hilton is a dollface (Websters)

Steve Bing, ladykiller? (CandyKirby)

Single ladies of the night

Wanna come back to my...aerobics class?

Hey single ladies, not only does Beyonce have a tailor made song for you, but she’s also got some style tips for those looking to “put a ring on it” as the saying goes.  Shows off curves real fine, and the length – while barely enough to cover a cat flap – is just right for standing at the front of a VIP line or on a street corner waiting for Mr Right!

Pumpkin Beer and Oysterburger Links

Heather Locklear reminds me of something… (Lolebrity)

Sharon Stone wants her kid to have Botox (CelebWarship)

Spike Lee: Why Tonto Should Be a Brother (CandyKirby)

Playing the straight man to Pete Doherty’s Abbott AND Costello (AgentBedhead)

Bret Michaels’ wig is a blogger, too (CelebritySmack)

Kelly Osbourne owes her sex education to Black Sabbath (DailyStab)

Anne Hathaway does not talk nasty (CeleBitchy)

Where Beyonce’s old wigs go to die (Crunk&Disorderly)

God-hating Bill Maher vs Flat Earther Sherri Shepherd (Defamer)

The girl who was JT LeRoy (Gawker)

Mischa Barton works the “Gilbert Grape” look (GoFugYourself)

Helena Bonham Carter’s steampunk shoes (DListed)

Dave Grohl identifies with his attackers (GabbyBabble)

The Wire, with special guest Samuel Beckett (EvilBeet)

Vivienne Westwood’s Parisian catwalk pix (HollywoodRag)

Naomi Watts just won the birthday present stakes (PopSugar)

The Hills monumental recap (IBBB)

Chace Crawford needs to overcome gayface (Mollygood)

Sarah Michelle Gellar and a dolphin unicorn chaser (Websters)

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