It’s time to announce the winner of our gloriously-resurrected Friday Caption Contest. It really was a good round with some fresh entries, but in the end There Can Be Only One.

This is a green dress, no really

Klee May 18, 2013 at 10:31 pm #

“the deadliest catch” teams up with “project runway” to create the flotsam collection for fall 2013. Make it work!

Congratulations and imaginary swag to Klee! For her hypothetical trophy of virtual awesomeness, we present this antique bejewelled Fish Bangle Bracelet.

This would actually work really well with that dress

You know what to do. Do it in the comments for fabulous, completely imaginary prizes!

This is a green dress, no really in a way

I believe this is the first time the red carpet at Cannes has played host to any garment made from plastic foam muffin pans, but then there’s a first for everything.

You know what to do. Do it in the comments section for fabulous imaginary prizes.

Jeremy Renner WTF

You know what to do. Do it in the comments section for fabulous, completely imaginary prizes. This Friday’s commemorative cocktail to put you in the mood and to drink in solidarity with our Nemo-ridden friends in the East is the Velvet Manhattan: 2 ounces of Maker’s Mark bourbon, 1/2 ounce red vermouth, dash chocolate bitters, served in a rocks glass over ice, preferably fancy ice. I do love fancy ice. The more carats the better. Where was I? Oh yes, ordering another Manhattan and contemplating the beauty that is Beyonce.

Beyonce

Ho, ho, ho, it’s time to see who’s been naughty or nice enough to win our Caption Contest from Friday.

Tom Daley Santa

Klee December 16, 2012 at 9:44 am #

“Finally-I get MY wish!” exclaimed Mrs. Claus

Kudos and imaginary swag to Klee, who has now wrapped up two victories in a row! It’s hard to imagine a better fantasy pressie than British diver Tom Daley, so we’ve decided to give her this series of Tom Daley Stripping gifs. Feliz Lookitdat!

Oh, Santa baby! This should inspire a few of you to new heights of snarktastic appreciation. Captions in the comments section, like always.

Tom Daley Santa

We’re catching up slowly but surely on the backlog, and have been so drugged up with Nyquil and Dayquil and Duskquil and Dawnquil that we didn’t even realize we’d done two Demis in a row (does that sum to one whole Hemi?). Nor that we had slipped into the second-person plural. So without further ado or further medication, we present our double Demi prizewinners:

Demi Lovato

Klee
December 2, 2012 at 10:45 am  #

After her first hook-up with Spiderman, Mary Jane experienced some odd side effects….

Congratulations and imaginary swag, as always, to multi-time-winner Klee! To celebrate her triumph we hypothetically present this beautiful, and entirely virtual, Carltonware Spiderweb Demitasse set. Cheers!

Carltonware spiderweb demitasse

And now, for our second contest: Demi Moore.

Demi Moore

Natalie Anne Lanoville December 8, 2012 at 10:58 pm #

Tired of going commando in the hopes of being snapped for cootersightings.com, Demi Moore settles for a side-eye from her daughter’s sax instructor.

Kudos and imaginary swag to Natalie, who has once again taken the prize. Bonus points for not cellulite-shaming.To honour her victory, we hypothetically present the virtual, and highly body-conscious, Royal Doulton Biltmore Demitasse Cup & Saucer. Make your kids green with envy!

I believe this is the first GIF we’ve featured as our Friday Caption Contest. You know what to do, so do it in the comments.

Demi Moore