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Happy Halloween from the Crypt!

Kate Moss Jamie Hince and Lila

Kate Moss Jamie Hince and Lila Grace

Now THIS is an adorable family group of Halloween costumes. Lila is a zombie, Kate Moss is Helena Bonham Carter’s Period, and Jamie Hince is a dead ringer for Pete Doherty.

Friday Caption Contest: KK Edition

You know what to do. Do it in the comments section for fabulous, completely imaginary prizes.

Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian

Oh no, Sheryl Crow

Oh no, Sheryl Crow

Oh no, Sheryl Crow

Apparently recovering pop-rocker Sheryl Crow made an appearance over the weekend at the Academy of Country Music awards, modeling an ensemble from the Lingerie department of Sears, Roebuck circa 1974. The bustier says “lifts and separates, tucks and squeezes,” while the flowing pants say, “and then there’s Maude.” And the stylist says, “Hey, I had an alibi!”

JLo got the memo

Jlo grammy leg

Jlo grammy leg

She not only got the infamous Grammy “no dirty bits” memo, she inspired it. And, as you can see, she managed to transcend it with the drop-deadest drop-dead dress of all time, with an assist from the Angie Leg. Clever girl! Saves 50% on waxing!

Friday Caption Contest: Bey-ond

You know what to do. Do it in the comments section for fabulous, completely imaginary prizes. This Friday’s commemorative cocktail to put you in the mood and to drink in solidarity with our Nemo-ridden friends in the East is the Velvet Manhattan: 2 ounces of Maker’s Mark bourbon, 1/2 ounce red vermouth, dash chocolate bitters, served in a rocks glass over ice, preferably fancy ice. I do love fancy ice. The more carats the better. Where was I? Oh yes, ordering another Manhattan and contemplating the beauty that is Beyonce.

Beyonce

Beyonce

Friday Caption Contest Results: Double Demi Edition

We’re catching up slowly but surely on the backlog, and have been so drugged up with Nyquil and Dayquil and Duskquil and Dawnquil that we didn’t even realize we’d done two Demis in a row (does that sum to one whole Hemi?). Nor that we had slipped into the second-person plural. So without further ado or further medication, we present our double Demi prizewinners:

Demi Lovato

Demi Lovato

Klee
December 2, 2012 at 10:45 am  #

After her first hook-up with Spiderman, Mary Jane experienced some odd side effects….

Congratulations and imaginary swag, as always, to multi-time-winner Klee! To celebrate her triumph we hypothetically present this beautiful, and entirely virtual, Carltonware Spiderweb Demitasse set. Cheers!

Carltonware spiderweb demitasse

Carltonware spiderweb demitasse

And now, for our second contest: Demi Moore.

Demi Moore

Demi Moore

Natalie Anne Lanoville December 8, 2012 at 10:58 pm #

Tired of going commando in the hopes of being snapped for cootersightings.com, Demi Moore settles for a side-eye from her daughter’s sax instructor.

Kudos and imaginary swag to Natalie, who has once again taken the prize. Bonus points for not cellulite-shaming.To honour her victory, we hypothetically present the virtual, and highly body-conscious, Royal Doulton Biltmore Demitasse Cup & Saucer. Make your kids green with envy!

Friday Caption Contest: Demi Does Art Basel Edition

I believe this is the first GIF we’ve featured as our Friday Caption Contest. You know what to do, so do it in the comments.

Demi Moore

Demi Moore

Chips down, players up

Jennifer Tilley wins

Jennifer Tilley wins

Actress, celebrity, and Colin Firth’s ex-sister-out-law Jennifer Tilly is currently cutting quite a swathe through the world of professional poker, winning her way to an income substantial enough that she’s talked about ditching acting altogether. That’s what WE call a Party Casino!

Fortunes have been won and lost on the poker table, but Tilly has a system. A secret. Something never known to fail in the history of mankind. What is the key to her gaming success? Two things:

2 secrets of Jennifer Tilly

2 secrets of Jennifer Tilly

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