Ayyyy! » Christina Aguilera

Panty Moistening Prince Harry and Puppy Post-Hump Day Hunk

raincoaster — Fri, 22 Apr 2011 06:39:42 +0000

Sorry we’re late with this. Down with a spell of food poisoning: I should never have switched from vodka to lemonade. It was obviously too much for my system (also, lemon juice goes bad? WHO KNEW?).

This will make it all better.

Prince Harry and a puppy. You're welcome.

Awwww. Now that you’ve recovered sufficiently, let’s move on to some adorable gossip links.

Deflowering virgins on television? Eh, it’s a living for Sandra Rinomato. Does she know Harvey? (Crasstalk)

Spirit Animals: how do they work? Help me choose between Courage Wolf and Sexually Oblivious Rhino as my mascot (raincoaster)

Pitcher? or catcher? The all-important “what to put the booze in” question just in time for picnic season (ManoloFood)

Nigella Lawson undercover. Girlfriend, jihadi chic is NOT how you do a topless beach. (Ayyyy)

This is why cutoffs were invented. There … wait … hmmm? … what was I saying? (Lolebrity)

Win a pair of Whooga boots! Like the FB page and enter to win one of three pairs each month (Whooga)

ScarPenn/SeanJo trouble in paradise? Uh, well duh. And somewhere, Ryan Reynolds chuckles softly. (AgentBedhead)

Why do they put the coke THERE? Playboy Bunnies are dumb, yo. (BusyBeeBlogger)

No, seriously, I thought this was Carrot Top for a second. Someone needs to give Rihanna some conditioner STAT (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Kate Middleton does a discreet Michael Jackson crotch grab, paparazzi fails to notice? (CelebritySmack)

Time’s 100 Most Influential People once again leaves me off the list. I had to beg them. Discretion is everything to me (CelebVIPLounge)

We may get our wish: Snooki is slowly vanishing! Just hang in there till 2020 and she’ll disappear entirely! (DailyStab)

Anything to get laid, eh RPattz? Dreamy McSparklepants reveals his sordid social secrets (EarSucker)

Oh look, it’s old Mae West– oh wait, it’s Xtina. That lingerie must have more technology than a typical NASA launch to keep from self-destructing. That is one whole lotta surface tension (FitFabCeleb)

Honestly, Gaga, that was so ret- … uh, developmentally challenged! (GirlsTalkinSmack)

Kanye Kant (run his charity anymore, that is). Kanye West doesn’t care about other people? (HaveUHeard)

So how much DOES it cost to marry a crown prince? It’s important to do the math, people. (HollywoodHiccups)

Gwen Stefani invites science to knock her up. I know any number of labcoated genii who’d be happy to oblige (INeedMyFix)

Everyone loves a man in uniform. Or a hot lesbian. Just as long as they’re doing a Britney lipdub. (MathewGuiver)

The Britney performance the network didn’t want you to see! No, seriously, they went to commercial. (PoorBritney)

James Marsden with cuddly bunnies, chicks, etc. No, seriously, why haven’t you clicked this already? (Swoonworthy)

An Olsen Twin debuts the World’s Ugliest Pants. No seriously, the other one keeps cracking up. Guess who lost the bet in the dressing room? (TheSkinny)

Dances with Scientologists. This guy has been milking that one role for nearly 40 years now (TheSkinnyChic)

Friday Caption Contest: Catherine Zeta Jones bikini edition

raincoaster — Sat, 16 Apr 2011 05:36:32 +0000

You know what to do. Do it in the comments:

: Gee, Catherine Zeta-Jones, haven’t seen much of you lately. Comparatively speaking.

I think it’s pretty clear there can be but one cocktail accompaniment to this, and that is a Naked Martini, otherwise known as gin, straight up (note not neat; “straight up” is shaken or stirred over ice to put a little water and oxygen into it, and gets it nice and cold, and now your cocktail trivia lesson for today is at an end).

And now, your gossip links, including the one from which I stole that picture:

And this is what happened to Steve Jobs, Viggo Mortensen and Julian Assange (raincoaster)

Help poor John Galliano find another job! (Ayyyy)

Winedown with Jean-Georges! (ManoloFood)

I am Woman, Hear me roar! (Lolebrity)

He’d better never date Jessica Simpson (AgentBedhead)

“Hustler?” Gee, I knew she was looking for work, but golly! (BusyBeeBlogger)

We should feel sorrier for her because she’s wearing THAT (CelebDirtyLaundry)

The Empress of Lucite just got some more plastic (CelebritySmack)

Lock up your lesbians! Xtina is single! (DailyStab)

America is a Miley-free zone? (EarSucker)

Gee, Catherine Zeta-Jones, haven’t seen much of you lately, comparatively speaking (FitFabCeleb)

PWND! (GirlsTalkinSmack)

We LOST track of Evangeline Lilly (HollywoodHiccups)

Gwyneth Paltrow’s hip bones make the cover of Self (INeedMyFix)

Marilyn Manson official scrapes the bottom of the barrel (MathewGuiver)

Because nobody watches Britney vids for the singing (PoorBritney)

RIP Mr. Tiger Beat (Swoonworthy)

What does “Virgin Marathon” even mean? You hold out till marriage? (TheSkinny)

It was the jacket, wasn’t it? (TheSkinnyChic)

Mystery Flapper Links!

raincoaster — Tue, 05 Apr 2011 06:53:42 +0000

Yes, it’s another round of “Guess the Celebrity(and let’s see if it takes you more than fifteen minutes this time).”

Mystery Flapper is where Karl Lagerfeld stole his fan?

Guesses in the comments, and while you’re pondering, I suggest you enjoy a tasty and nutritious Strawberry Flapper and some gossip links:

The most epic post in the history of epicosity! (raincoaster)

Brando prepares for his greatest role (ManoloFood)

Lindsay Lohan SANS FARDS (Ayyyy)

Harry Potter and the Slash of Fandom (Lolebrity)

Nicole Kidman’s been swallowed by a python (AgentBedhead)

And her baby is all, “Wasn’t SATC ten years ago? Whatever, Mom.” (BusyBeeBlogger)

So does three quarters of Louisiana, but that won’t make it happen (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Xtina has the hiccups (CelebDirtyLaundry)

OH MY GOD I AM SUDDENLY SO HAPPY AND DUMB. AND HAPPY!!!1!! (DailyStab)

Won’t you spare a thought for the poor reality show millionaires? (EarSucker)

What Beaker Saw (cannot be unseen, I warned you!) (FitFabCeleb)

No, Justin, that’s not what she meant by the Burning Bush (GirlsTalkinSmack)

Kirstie Alley not immune to gravity (HaveUHeard)

L. Ron Jr is five! (HollywoodHiccups)

Amy Winehouse put a ring on it (INeedMyFix)

The Oddest Couple (MathewGuiver)

Then she took some gigolo to Disneyland (PoorBritney)

Garey Busey almost gets Meatloafed (PopBytes)

I don’t know who this is, but I want it (SwoonWorthy)

Tara Reid still clinging to life, relevance (TheSkinny)

On the other hand, how much do most 90-year-olds make? (TheSkinnyChic)

Stephen and Stephen say howdy to emo links

raincoaster — Mon, 28 Mar 2011 06:43:08 +0000

Stephen and Stephen

I’m in quite a mood lately, so getting through the gossip links today is gonna take a double.

If this doesn’t fix the situation in Japan, nothing will (raincoaster)

Hello. My name is Harry Potter. Prepare to die. (Lolebrity)

Saturday Caption Contest: Elizabeth Taylor Edition (Ayyyy)

Rachel Ray’s hideous secret (ManoloFood)

Whoopi Goldberg is out to destroy your sanity (AgentBedhead)

Happy Birthday, AntiChrist! (BusyBeeBlogger)

Kim Kardashian will DESTROY you, Nightlife! (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Madonna will KILL MALAWI BABIES! (CeleBitchy)

This unspeakable monstrosity is a harbinger of APOCALYPSE! (DListed)

The AntiChrist is ready for his closeup! (DailyStab)

One lone hero against the Great Satan (FitFabCeleb)

because domestic abuse is great for ratings (EvilBeet)

The Four Hipsters of the Apocalypse? (GirlsTalkinSmack)

The Whoar! of Babylon (HaveUHeard)

RIP DJ Megatron (HollywoodHiccups)

Proud Parents of the End Times (INeedMyFix)

Remember how awesome people used to be? Yeah, well now they’re not. (PopBytes)

Kate Moss looks bad. Hell froze over after all (TheSkinny)

Apparently, time is now flowing backwards (TheSkinnyChic)

Here are the troubadours of Apocalypse (SeriouslyOMG)

Mubarak Chic!

raincoaster — Thu, 03 Mar 2011 03:57:41 +0000

Mubarak Chic: yes, you can judge a book by its cover

Truly has it been said that fascists generally have the best uniforms. When it comes to fallen dictators, however, the same is not true. Look at Hosni Mubarak here, former president of Egypt and current homeless dude. Never mind the cut of his jib, we can tell he’s earned those stripes. It may look like a regular old pinstripe suit, but if God is in the details I’d have to say this qualifies as blasphemy, because those stripes are actually made up of his name, printed over and over. Of such gaudy heights of self-aggrandizement may the average Mafiosi only dream.

Speaking of gaudy pinstripes, let’s drown our sartorial sorrows with a classic Bronx Cocktail and a few buttoned-down gossip links, shall we?

Baby on Board (raincoaster)

Nicole Kidman could use a sammich (Lolebrity)

London Fashion Week is for the birds (Ayyyy)

I scream! (ManoloFood)

He should fit right in with Lindsay and Gadaffi (AgentBedhead)

Charlie Sheen too busy winning to retain custody of his kids (BusyBeeBlogger)

Justin Bieber sells out to rich witch doctor? (CelebDirtyLaundry)

A simple summit with Lady Gaga (CelebritySmack)

Robert Pattinson cheats on Tai (CelebVIPLounge)

Babies: totally Team Coco (CityRag)

Katie “Sue” Holmes (DailyStab)

Kim Kardashian, Saviour of Autotune (Earsucker)

Save Oprah! (FitFabCeleb)

Another sign Russia is in desperate straights (GirlsTalkinSmack)

Oh man, the ski lobby hates celebrities (HaveUHeard)

ScarJo publicly toejobs Sean Penn (INeedMyFix)

Oh Em Jee, the Oscars are about to get awesome (MathewGuiver)

Britney’s V shots (PoorBritney)

Sad Mugshot Xtina is sad (PopBytes)

Amanda Seyfried’s magically transforming Doc Martens (TheSkinny)

Five Angels, only two backsides among them (TheSkinnyChic)

Firecrotch No More!

raincoaster — Fri, 21 Jan 2011 09:34:45 +0000

Yes, that's a vagina sweater

Thanks to our pal DemiCouture, we were made aware of this … remarkable … sweater from Topshop. Perchance is it Brazilian?

Definitely your go-to choice if you’re either “professionally companionable” or dating a guy who drives a Hummer.

Saint Bill of Murray (Lolebrity)

Michael Douglas photobomb! (raincoaster)

Julian Assange is the greatest photoshop opportunity of our time (Ayyyy)

Cheese it! That’s too expensive! (Manolofood)

Katie Holmes and the World’s Ugliest Pants (AgentBedhead)

But did he put it on her FINGER? (AmyGrindhouse)

Are We There Yet contest (BusyBeeBlogger)

Jennifer Aniston pulls a Bridget Jones (CeleBitchy)

Palin putting it around? (CelebDirtyLaundry)

I see dumb people. They don’t know they’re dumb (CelebritySmack)

Annalynne McCord gives a puppy a helping hand (CityRag)

This choice of Catwoman is nuts! (DailyStab)

You can get arrested for just acting weird? (FitFabCeleb)

Xtina is X-ed out in someone else’s bed (GirlsTalkinSmack)

P!nk is F!!!ing Perfect (HaveUHeard)

Rachel Zoe is unapologetically elasticized (INeedMyFix)

Spears for Sears? (PoorBritney)

Prince + Madonna = Tru Luv 4 eva (PopBytes)

David Spade is OLD: FACT of life (SeriouslyOMG)

The Fashion Police are Playing Rough (links)

raincoaster — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 03:05:57 +0000

Whoa, they aren’t messing around anymore! I’d like to know who down at Headquarters okayed that hiring decision.

Are you a celebrity blogger who’d rather drink than link (and wouldn’t we all?) email me at raincoaster at gmail:
I’m starting a linking service to do your work for you! And I’m working on an ad network to launch in the fall.

What Would Neil Patrick Harris Do? (Lolebrity)
World’s cutest octopus (raincoaster)
These boots were made for stalking (Shoeblogs)
Why dress well? (ManoloBig)
This is a pervy poultry fancier’s dream come true (TeenyManolo)
Stacked! (ManoloHome)
New Dork Times (ManoloBrides)
Bill Murray previews Amy Winehouse’s retirement plan (AgentBedhead)
Lindsay Lohan’s lesbian prison chixploitation script writes itself (BestWeekEver)
Jennifer Aniston raises a stink in London (BricksAndStones)
I’d do that all the time if I were a Lohan (BusyBeeBlogger)
Whoopi brought her friend Harvey on the View (CeleBitchy)
A heaping hunk of himbos (CelebDirtyLaundry)
Ben Affleck’s Batcave (CelebrityMound)
Katy Perry gives a generation of fanboys diabetes (CelebritySmack)
Foxy Brown performs her version of “New Moon” (Crunk+Disorderly)
I could make a tart joke but I’ll just say “bun in the oven” (DailyStab)
Twit o’ the Day: LindsayInJail (Twitter)
Is this the long-awaited Hilton sister porno? (DanasDirt)
Some people will do ANYTHING to be like their favorite star (EvilBeet)
Forget Zardoz: Hail ZDROK! (FourFour)
Beauty and the Geeks (GabbyBabble)
STOP! In the name of fug! (GoFugYourself)
Kim Kardashian ->Victoria Beckham? (HollywoodBackwash)
Hey LOTR nerds! It’s BloomsDay! (HollywoodRag)
The Big Babeh Bummer (INeedMyFix)
Leo lays it out (HaveUHeard)
The strangest strap-on I have ever seen (IBBB)
16-year-old learns to dress herself (JustJared)
Situation Normal…rest of them AFU (MaterialBitch)
Britney Spears is team LAY OFF ME (PerezHilton)
Natalie Portman’s swan song (PinkIsTheNewBlog)
Katie Price is so not G-A-Y (UKPopSugar)
We’ve lost her (PopBytes)
V for…vajayjay? (SeriouslyOMG)

Why Is Lindsay F – ed Up? Michael Lohan charged with harassment for alleged attack on own fiancee (chicagoraysrants.com)
Lindsay Lohan…Tweeting from Jail? (thegloss.com)

Ground Control to Major Tomboy

raincoaster — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 10:41:51 +0000

I was going to make fun of this woman for dressing like a lesbionic Martian flapper, but then I looked at the fine print and realized HOLY SHIT THAT’S VERUSCHKA and she is entitled to dress any way she likes.

Veruschka has always dressed that way, it turns out

And now, to the technology-themed link roundup.

I’ll have you know that Jackie Chan has never seen that troll farm in his life! (Lolebrity)

Is it time to upgrade to a new Mom? (TeenyManolo)

A scientifically-enhanced Madonna choking a chicken (Shoeblogs)

YouTube needs to take the Cure (Manolobig)

Modern superfoods not so super if you ask me (Manolofood)

Weddings go Back to the Future (ManoloBride)

Everything New is Old again (ManoloHome)

A return to classics at Louis Vuitton (BusyBeeBlogger)

Dakota Fanning travels forward in time (CeleBitchy)

Elton John was on hold for 43 years (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Kim Kardashian, new and improved (DailyStab)

Modern medicine + Twitter = EW! (EvilBeet)

Kick Ass 2.0 (GabbyBabble)

Alien Couture Blazer of the Future (HaveUHeard)

Canadians are fashion-forward (INeedMyFix)

Internet to blogger, internet to blogger… (IBBB)

Boy George has been using that I Hate Megan Fox app (SeriouslyOMG)

Prince shuts down his website, probably issued press release via carrier pigeon (Bossip)

Trent Reznor is the Anti-Prince (AgentBedhead)

The science of Ozzy Osbourne (AllieIsWired)

Lilo’s twitter account needs an upgrade from “Horribly Tacky” (AmyGrindhouse)

America, at this precise moment in time (BestWeekEver)

Reznor 2.0 on the way (BricksAndStones)

Rachel Dratch 2.0 on the way (CelebrityBabyScoop)

The future of Old Dude tv (CelebrityBeehive)

Hate Megan Fox? There’s an app for that (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

Don Johnson is a New Math genius! (CelebrityMound)

Mel Gibson vs technology (CelebritySmack)

Re-engineering the Calendar Girl (CelebVIPLounge)

Practical science for Lindsay Lohan (CelebSlam)

What, there are people who still use these? (CityRag)

Some icons are worth preserving (CrazyDays&Nights)

Thanks to modern science, we know what a catsuit made of Skittles looks like (Crunk&Disorderly)

Colin Farrell looks into the future (DListed)

Blogger vs Viacom (FourFour)

War of the Nerds (Gawker)

Alien Couture of the Future (GoFugYourself)

Cameron Diaz encounters Alien Growth Ray (HollywoodBackwash)

Amy Winehouse’s home-made cigarette carrier (HollywoodRag)

Scarjo channels Bardot (HollywoodTuna)

The Dion Spawn has been scanned (ImNotObsessed)

Tori Spelling has the very latest thing in wheels (JanetCharlton)

Ziyi Zhang transforms into sport star! (JustJared)

Fun with photos (of billionaires and their supermodels) (LaineyGossip)

The internet drives some people crazy (MaterialBitch)

If he could turn back time (MovieLine)

Vintage Bieber. No, that is not a typo (PerezHilton)

Test tube babydaddy Ronaldo (PinkIsTheNewBlog)

Amy Winehouse returns to the past as she steps into the future (UKPopSugar)

New priestly crime not the same as the old priestly crime (WizbangPop)

Blogger of the moment, in the mo (PopBytes)

Medical science to solve mystery kidnapping (RadarOnline)

Cedric Diggory is a trending topic? (ASL)

It’s like America’s Funniest Home Videos, courtesy of YouTube (SquareEyes)

Download Sheryl Too Thin and Too Tan Crow (TenGossip)

Cameron Diaz uses ancient sexual technique (TheBosh)

Kate Moss’s better living through chemistry (TheSkinny)

All of YouTube vs Xtina (WorldofWonder)

Twitpics of the Rich and Famous (YoungBlackAndFabulous)

Monday Man Links

raincoaster — Mon, 10 May 2010 10:41:45 +0000

Let’s start the week right with some eye candy, shall we? Presenting Prince Hot Ginge:

As Borat would say, “verrrrry niiiiiiiiice!” The great thing about uniforms is, if they look bad the entire country complains about them until they get fixed; in a way, it’s sort of crowdsourcing design. Yes, there are practical considerations to which one must Iraqiesce. Sure, it may never be as sleek as if Hedi Slimane got his hands on it, but on the plus side, most of the recruits would be able to fit into the uniforms without contracting cosmetic tuberculosis first.

Sami Salo’s Internet Celebrity Takes Balls (True/Slant)

Nicole Kidman can’t exorcise the ghost of Tom Cruise (Lolebrity)

Red Sole Diaries (TheManolo)

The Death of Cute (TheBigGirls)

Jennifer Aniston’s baby food consequences (TeenyManolo)

These crazy kids! (ManoloHome)

Happy Mother of the Bride Day (ManoloBrides)

Henry Rollins is outed! (AgentBedhead)

RIP Lena Horne (AmyGrindhouse)

Betty White OWNs Saturday Night (BusyBeeBlogger)

Heidi Klum wants into your closet! (CeleBitchy)

You’re the man now, Chaz! (CelebDirtyLaundry)