Ayyyy!

Shaun White ignores, to his credit, traditional advice for pattern on pattern.

Sven Kramer pwns NBC (raincoaster)

Padma’s pads (Lolebrity)

Suicide Girls Must Die (AgentBedhead)

Mel B. is 1/2 the wacko Britney was (AmyGrindhouse)

Colin Firth insufficiently gay for Tom Ford (BusyBeeBlogger)

Johnny Weir is too sexy for Vangroover (CeleBitchy)

Ali Lohan -> Dita von Teese? (CelebDirtyLaundry)

The Return of Cinnabun (CelebritySmack)

When Cougars Attack, starring Demi Moore and Susan Sarandon (CityRag)

Ewan McGregor is Out (DailyStab)

Flying Tomato drops bomb (Gawker)

The Return of Harriet Carter Wednesday (IBBB)

Kate Moss coulda been a neurosurgeon (INeedMyFix)

Do you want fries with that? (GoFugYourself)

Celine’s overshare will go on (Lainey)

Britney’s sour Candies (DListed)

We’re on a boat! (JustJared)

They’ve Lost the plot (Movieline)

The tears of a Canuck (PerezHilton)

Whatchootalkinbout Gary Coleman (SeriouslyOMG)

Twihardgasm! (TenGossip)

Justin Timberlake wants you to put a sock in it (ASL)

Olympic Medalist Moguliste Hannah Kearney of the US isn’t sure which to admire more: her gold medal or the sweet bouquet of BC Bud with which she was presented.

This is what she sees later that night (Lolebrity)

Stephen Baldwin does NOT fancy vampires (AgentBedhead)

Brittany Murphy’s shaky Foundation (AmyGrindhouse)

Tila Tequila falls on butt, suffers brain injury (AllieIsWired)

Bono has come back to me (BusyBeeBlogger)

Stephen Colbert brings it: 1812, The Rematch! (CeleBitchy)

Kiefer is down for the count! (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Jennifer Garner goes Elektra on VDay (PopEater)

Kevin Smith, mad Twitterbomber (CelebritySmack)

Hate NBC? Love families? Make them pay! (CelebrityVIPLounge)

Hugo Boss shops Canadian (DailyStab)

Joe Biden, you’re no Dick Cheney (Gawker)

Robert Pattinson is open to homoeopathy (DListed)

Britney’s special Valentine (EvilBeet)

The Olympic Schedule (HaveUHeard)

A year in the life of LiLo (IBBB)

Kelly Osbourne is still alive (INeedMyFix)

Perez and John Mayer sittin’ in a tree… (LitelySalted)

Pups & Order (NastyNets)

Make your own star baby (TenGossip)

Nekkid Brit: keeper or throw back? (UKPopSugar)

But are we, in fact, the world? (PopBytes)

Movie mulligans (Movieline)

Do your best/worst in the comments. Use an assumed name if you think this terrifying creature might come after you.

At last we learn the backstory to the shot herd ’round the world. Oh Snoop, we’ve all been there.

Claire Danes knows how to work a trenchcoat (Lolebrity)

Celebrities! They’re not like us! They can walk in these shoes! (CelebToast)

The best 404 message online (AgentBedhead)

Om Nom Nom WHA???? (AllieIsWired)

Brittany Murphy, Casey Johnson, Basic Health Rules laid to rest (AmyGrindhouse)

Demon in sheep’s clothing (BWE)

Anne Hathaway flips the bird (BricksAndStones)

Alexis for Alexis! (BusyBeeBlogger)

Ooh La Little Girl Lingerie? (LaughingStork)

Kate, I think you dropped something (HolyMoly)

Sandra Bullock will cut a bitch (LitelySalted)

Forget Mischa Barton, try Carole Channing! (LaineyGossip)

Kristen Stewart in court for prostitution (TMZ)

Ralph Lauren snubs in public! (CelebrityMound)

Ellen for President? (CelebrityDirtyLaundry)

Tom Brady’s 2-month-old can run??? (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Oooh, ACDC MUST DIE!!!! (CeleBitchy)

Jay-Qui? (CelebrityVIPLounge)

Possibly the most terrifying headline I’ve ever read (CelebritySmack)

Kanye survives horrifying ordeal (CelebSlam)

Bublé’s bongo bowl (CityRag)

Dennis Quaid’s farmer’s tan (CrazyDaysAndNights)

The Real BabyMamas of Atlanta (Crunk+Disorderly)

Brangelina lives! (DailyStab)

Paris has gone to the dogs (DanasDirt)

Nicknames of the literati (Gawker)

The return of PuppyBowl (DListed)

Betty White is terrifying (EvilBeet)

Small Wonder it was cancelled (FourFour)

Janet Jackson is a Janet Jackson impersonator (GabbyBabble)

Best Dressed/Worst Dressed at the Grammys (GoFugYourself)

Snooki’s makeover (ImBringingBloggingBack)

Qween no longer on Scene (INeedMyFix)

How Hugh Jackman rolls (HaveUHeard)

World’s most expensive benchwarmers (HollywoodBackwash)

Flack pointedly does NOT deny Paris Hilton is dumb (HollywoodRag)

Sniff Beyonce for $50 (HollywoodTuna)

KFat achieves self-awareness (ImNotObsessed)

Leif Garrett busted NOT A FLASHBACK TO 1975 (Janet CharltonsHollywood)

Virgins versus Texting! (JustJared)

PETA vs Avatar (Movieline)

Jessica Biel definitely not Jewish (FitCeleb)

Frances Bean taking singing lessons (PerezHilton)

Stock Anderson Cooper Adorable Story (PinkIsTheNewBlog)

Russell Brand shoots, scores (UKPopSugar)

Jamaican Bobsled Team not so cool (WizBangPop)

Orlando Bloom is all wet (PopBytes)

Kelly Clarkson in flamewar (RadarOnline)

Re-Enchanted (SeriouslyOMG)

Tila says the butler didn’t do it (ASocialiteLife)

Conan O’Brien’s Valentine to Britney (SquareEyes)

Saffy, darling, are you slumming in this movie? (TenGossip)

John Mayer needs to take off the Wayfarers (TheBosh)

Mischa Barton wins Best Supporting Hose (TheSkinny)

Bill Gates on Manhunt? (raincoaster)

Mr Bean goes to the Spanish Parliament (Guardian)

Iran. Iran so far away (Gawker)

Guido 2.0 (Lolebrity)

Eli Roth hacked and attacked by 200 Mexicans (Twitter)

Remix Trent Reznor (AgentBedhead)

Ellen Photoshops her way into the AI lineup (AmyGrindhouse)

RPattz and KStew ambushed! (AllieIsWired)

Lilo is robbed! (BusyBeeBlogger)

Rihanna’s outfit slashed! (INeedMyFix)

Pete and Ashlee hack the paps (CelebritySmack)

Redmond O’Neal busted again (CelebrityDirtyLaundry)

Mariah Carey’s jewels cased (HolyCandy)

OctoDoc takes the rap (CeleBitchy)

Angel stops cougar attack (DListed)

Celebrities caught in action (CrazyDaysAndNights)

Mischa Barton turns hooker (DailyStab)

The LA Coroner is mystified (EvilBeet)

Sean Penn is a stooge (GabbyBabble)

Madonna takes the rap (INO)

Halle Berry hacked! (JustJared)

Gay blades Jim Carrey and Ewan MacGregor come out (Movieline)

JSimp’s hairy sitch (PopSugar)

More deets on the Bear Jew Werewolf Shark attack (TenGossip)

Joan Rivers is a threat to national security (LitelySalted)

Ava Jackman demonstrates that the ability to upstage one’s costars is genetic.

Katy Perry shows that Santa really IS coming (Lolebrity)

Daniel Radcliffe’s bum career (AgentBedhead)

Tiger is hiding his wood in several different club bags (AmyGrindhouse)

Bridget dumps Bernie, moves on to Bernice (BWE)

Dave Navarro OWNS the celebrity blogosphere (BBB)

Sarah Jessica Parker hiring nannies from sweatshops? (CeleBitchy)

George Michael OWNS celebrity Christmas music (PopBytes)

Mickey Rourke takes another prize (HolyMoly)

Oh noes! JT has a mini-fro! (LitelySalted)

Kingston Rossdale has a fauxhawk (CelebritySmack)

The gayest video of all time? (Crunk+Disorderly)

Marilyn Monroe and Maryjane (DailyStab)

The Hills, the comic book (Gawker)

Goth Skater Cocktail Chic (GoFugYourself)

Whitney Houston LOVES awards (FourFour)

Happy Birthday Britney (GabbyBabble)

John Mayer really cares about our Golden Couple (EvilBeet)

Susan Boyle is unstoppable (DListed)

Mischa Barton, soon to appear on Oprah (INO)

Jessica Simpson, Not Working (Justjared)

Sandra Bullock plays quarterback (Movieline)

Help John Mellencamp quit smoking (SeriouslyOMG)

I just knew that Black Eyed Pea couldn’t have come up with that move on her own.

If she didn’t steal it from Katie back in ‘96, she got it from Madonna, any time in the last 30 years.

Professional Divorcee Jocelyne Wildenstein

or

Dawn French and Jennifer Saunders as Jackie and Joan Collins?