Happy Mother’s Day to all our dear readers! Sometimes living up to the standards set by Dina Lohan can be inordinately tiring, so we hope you and your moms have a wonderfully restful and enjoyable day today.
If you were to draw a thought bubble above the koala’s head what would it say?
(a) Those Kardashians are such hangers on.
(b) While you’re back there, can you use your face to wipe my ass too?
(c) Reality show stars - a more serious problem than climate change.
(d) This is the most boring sex tape I’ve ever made.
The Hoff knows the mighty power of an 8 1/2 by 11 (Defamer)
Kimberly Stewart wears possibly the ugliest shoes the universe has ever seen (TheRadReport)
Katie needs a raise! (BittenAndBound)
Lindsay Lohan will NOT assume the missionary position (Yeeeeah)
David Beckham says his prayers (TheBlemish)
Jennifer Aniston’s Miss Havisham decorating scheme (POTP)
A little bit country, a little bit hip-hop, a LOT batshiat insane (ImNotObsessed)
Kelly Osborne, unmasked! (LARagMag)
Gentlemen, start your engines: Emma Watson is legal (Derober)
Tom Cruise will do anything for Becks, even endure soccer (DailyStab)
Mary-Kate Olsen celebrates New Year’s in April. Also, apparently, Halloween (JustJared)
Britney’s comeback plan (PinkIsTheNewBlog)
Pete Doherty maintains personal hygiene in prison (AgentBedhead)
Brangelina is a contraceptive (CeleBitchy)
Shirley Manson is a grown-up (CelebritySmack)
Tilda Swinton just as strange as imagined (CircusHour)
Liveblogging Sex with Sue (CandyKirby)
Gwyneth Paltrow is an alien (GoFugYourself)
RIP PawPaw (Gawker)
The Cruise family triplets (Defamer)
Jennifer Aniston’s Plan C (HollywoodOffender)
Angelina Jolie’s gestational diabetes (CelebrityDirt)
Paris Hilton wins contest she was born to conquer (GabbyBabble)
Drunkblogging The Hills (ImBringingBloggingBack)
Stuff Young Jewish Adults Like (StuffYoungJewishAdultsLike)
Hillary’s hidden heroism! (Gawker.com)
raincoaster, revealed (TheGrassyKnollInstitute)
“There’s no-one bigger than Johnny.” (AgentBedhead)
The ageless and well-lubricated beauty of Priscilla Presley (CircusHour)
Flying penguins discovered (BBC)
Kate Hudson baits her Owen Wilson trap with babies, apartments (CelebrityBabyScoop)
Lara Flynn Boyle’s face: a medical opinion (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)
Jessica Alba is practicing parenting on loaner charity children (Bastardly)
Keith Richards admits to drug use. No, not an April Fool’s story! (TheRadReport)
At least somebody still wants Britney Spears (DailyStab)
Cindy Crawford is immortal (CelebritySmack)
It’s all in the mouseovers, baby! The genesis of the Great Gossip Linkoff here.
Supprtd! (Defamer)
Suckaz! (Valleywag)
Accurst! (Gawker)
Dichotomous! (AgentBedhead)
Saviour! (Celebitchy)
Accident! (CrazyDaysAndNights)
Soap-On-A-Rope! (CelebritySmack)
Faceplant! (DListed)
Pooh! (Cityrag)
Duddy! (TheBlemish)
JagermICEter! (SeriouslyOMGWTF)
Greek! (ICYDK)
Yeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhhhno! (Queerty)
Drive! (Popsugar)
Majestic? (GoFugYourself)
Cloooooooooooney! (CircusHour)
Miserification! (Yeeeeah)
Infected! (Mollygood)
Single! (DailyStab)
Caffeinated! (JustJared)
NKOTB!!!!!!! (ImNotObsessed)
Awwww, how adorable! So innocent and inquisitive! Ain’t she the cutest, roly poly bundle of fluff you ever seen?
Five hours later……
What a little scamp! That’s the fourth keeper we’ve been through this month. It’s back to your climate-controlled cave and no dessert for you!
Celebs know you hate them (Gawker)
We’ve lost Will Smith (Defamer)
Conan the Late Night Barbarian (Cityrag)
Kelly Clarkson is a Commando! (DailyStab)
Who’d you rather? Luck of the drunkish game (LiquidGeneration)
50 animals with drinking problems (BestWeekEver)
Heather Mills gets nearly $50 million, makes her daughter fly coach anyway (Celebitchy)
Cindy Crawford’s beach house like a Russian nesting doll (Celebslam)
Full Frontal Friday (NSFW! and Jim Carrey is on there!) (CrazyDaysAndNights)
The end of Abba (GlitteratiGossip)
Divorce is pricey, y’all! (EvilBeet)
Michael Stipe’s closet has a revolving door (Dlisted)
Breaking: Ashton Kutcher is decorative (ImNotObsessed)
Orlando Bloom’s face suitable for scrubbing pans in a diner. Still decorative, though (Popsugar)
Pussycat Doll wears Mom Jeans! (TheGrumpiest)
Nicole Richie is as sick of Paris Hilton as everyone else (CelebritySmack)
Heather Mills is psychostylin’ (GoFugYourself)
Britney Spears in: Mad Max, Beyond Thunderthighs! (Yeeeeah)
Celebrities who look like leprechauns (CircusHour)
Halle Berry had her baby girl (PerezHilton)
Which of the following best describes the puppy’s sentiments?
(a) Unconvinced by recent gossip about Owen’s sizzling reunion with Kate Hudson
(b) Even more unconvinced by the latest attempt to hype up Owen and Jennifer Aniston as a new golden couple
(c) Looking forward to the moment when it will also become romantically linked with Owen
(d) Wishing it was cradled in the hunky arms of Eric Dane instead because hey there’s plenty of love to go around
Celebrity pickup lines (Agentbedhead)
Reasons to hate American Idol (ImBringingBloggingBack)
Rickrolling the Church of Scientology (Gawker)
Britney Spears is the Pied Piper of North Hollywood (CeleBitchy)
Colour me shocked: Paris Hilton neglects her pussy (Dlisted)
Colin Farrell will be best man at his brother’s gay wedding (Gabsmash)
Violet Affleck pats the bunny (CelebrityBabyScoop)
Lenny Kravitz in the hospital (CelebritySmack)
Fergie may have a pea in the pod (HollywoodBackwash)
Scarlett Johansson and Natalie Portman will eat your soul (DailyStab)
Nelly Furtado loses at the Grammys (GoFugYourself)
Dita von Teese dates down. Like, Backstreet Boy down (EvilBeet)
Barron Hilton runs down a gas station attendant, gets DUI’ed (Defamer)
Night of the Creeps: Kanye at the Grammys (fourfour)
John Mayer not checking into the Paris Hilton (HolyCandy)
Amy Winehouse goes from soundstage to lockup (ImNotObsessed)
Angelina loses an Oscar (Mollygood)
Emma Watson picks up Kirsten Dunst’s sloppy seconds (JustJared)
Gary Coleman is off the market, ladies (PerezHilton)
Time to disclose the celebrityt owners of the doggies in Monday/Tuesday’s puzzle corner:
1. Tori Spelling - Mimi La Rue (pug)
2. Orlando Bloom - Sidi (Saluki mix)
3. Selma Blair - Wink (Jack Russell terrier mix)
4. Jessica Simpson - Daisy (maltipoo)
5. Mischa Barton - Ziggy (Tibetan spaniel)
6. Jennifer Aniston - Dolly (German shepherd)
7. Martha Stewart - Francesca (French bulldog) and Paw Paw (chow chow)
8. Jake Gyllenhaal - Atticus Finch (German shepherd mix) and Boo Radley (puggle)
9. Jennifer Garner - Martha Stewart (laborador retriever)
10. Fran Drescher - Esther (pomeranian)
Well done, Jennie for a sterling 8/10! We doff our hats to your knowledge of celebrity petdom. Thanks to everyone else for your responses and sharing your own experiences! And now, here is a celebrity couple who could really use a seeing-eye dog or two:
Support Orama! (Orama08)
Rehabilitate ‘08! (Derober)
Puppy Bowl! (WithMalice)
Uneasy Riders: Brad Pitt vs Tom Cruise (Defamer)
Canadian celebrity gossip blogging smackdown! (Gawker)
Sam Lufti is no René Angelil! (Jezebel)
Smells like…Holy Spirit! (MoonbeamMcqueen)
What’s new for Old Spice Girls (AgentBedhead)
Tom Jones insures his chestrug for seven mill (CelebritySmack)
Angelina Jolie was sperminated the old-fashioned way (Celebitchy)
Nicole Richie’s big win over Christina Aguilera (Gabsmash)
TomKat’s latest project (HolyCandy)
Halle Berry’s babydaddy is prettier than you, her (DailyStab)
John Mayer rocks the Borat nutsack bathing suit (WeLoveCelebs)
Lindsay Lohan’s loose lips (HollywoodBackwash)
Viggo’s (fashion) Promises (GoFugYourself)
Milo Ventimiglia is not amused (ImNotObsessed)
I’m not quite sure what happened overnight (server rendered incapacitated by sight of John Travolta’s badger pelt?) but here is Monday’s puzzle corner again.
Carefully study this fabulous array of four legged creatures and tell me which celebrities own them. Answers to be put up on Thursday morning. Thank you for your patience!
