Ayyyy! » David Hasselhoff

Hump Day Hunk: Kiefer Sutherland Gets Lucky Edition

raincoaster — Thu, 19 Aug 2010 08:38:50 +0000

It’s about time we featured this hell-raiser. To the official World’s Coolest Canadian we raise a virtual shooter of Lotto 649: that’s a shot of the sixth bottle from the left, the fourth from the right, and the ninth from the left, mixed in a shooter.

Jennifer Aniston IS Cathy (Lolebrity)
The Divine Miss M (Farmer) (raincoaster)
Alexander Skarsgard is a closet preppy? (PopBytes)
U2.o (PerezHilton)
Frank? Harvey? (IBBB)
The Hoff to Host (HaveUHeard)
When tats collide! (DailyStab)
Richard Simmons’ pits of despair (CityRag)
Steven Tyler goes down on his audience (CelebritySmack)
Lilo’s caged heat (CelebDirtyLaundry)
Adam Lambert is an equal-opportunity diver (CelebrityFashionWatcher)
Gabriel Aubrey in bed (CeleBitchy)
This man has oral talents (BusyBeeBlogger)
Britney is a GleekTweep (AmyGrindhouse)
Necrophilia is the new black (AgentBedhead)

Shoes…of DEATH!

raincoaster — Tue, 03 Aug 2010 08:34:13 +0000

Seriously, those are fierce! I guess after stilettos, slingshots were next in the list of Top Ten Deadly Weapons That Make Cool Shoes?

And now, to the gossip roundup for the day:

Betty White’s might makes right! (Lolebrity)
Bad News for Dick Grayson (raincoaster)
Mirror, mirror, on my foot (Shoeblogs)
Giselle, you’re no Christy Turlington (TeenyManolo)
Monday and rainbows have been cancelled (ManoloBig)
Captions! In! Spaaaaaaace! (ManoloBrides)
Dr Atkins would have a heart attack (ManoloFood)
Dick Dale’s crib looks just like this (ManoloHome)
Nicole Kidman speaks for 5heads 4 Peece (AgentBedhead)
What kind of discount on rehab time will Lindsay get? (BusyBeeBlogger)
Katy Perry KNOWS she doesn’t make any sense (CeleBitchy)
Did Chelsea Clinton get chopped for her wedding? (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)
Now we know where Lady Gaga keeps her creativity (CelebrityDirtyLaundry)
More Hoff than you can handle (CelebritySmack)
Six STDs of Separation (CityRag)
Is there an archaeologist in da club? (CojoStyle)
JSimp found a Yalie (DailyStab)
Coming soon: the collected text messages of Ali Lohan (DListed)
Hey waitaminit: the company that turned down MY book said yes to Bieber??? (GabbyBabble)
Oh, don’t sweat it honey (GoFugYourself)
The Bachelorette finale (HaveUHeard)
Pamela Anderson welcomes the pitter-patter of little paws (INeedMyFix)
Cloris Leachman vs Betty White in Battle of the Cougars! (SeriouslyOMG)

Gag

raincoaster — Sat, 31 Jul 2010 07:58:24 +0000

Gaga me with a chainsaw

Without a Tracy (Lolebrity)
Shoe rights for the proletariat! (Shoeblogs)
No extra charge for the roofies! (ManoloBig)
Celebrity Dad Faceoff: Idris Elba vs Gavin Rossdale (TeenyManolo)
The rules of engagement for marrieds (ManoloMen)
Chelsea Clinton’s wedding roundup (ManoloBrides)
The Plastic Fantastic (ManoloHome)
Free Snooki! (WOWReport)
Is this the end for Speidi? (ASL)
Eli Roth and his little girl vs the Sun (SeriouslyOMG)
Ed Chestwick (JustJared)
All the Jersey Shore that’s fit to recap (IBBB)
Pratt less of one than usual (INeedMyFix)
JWoww lies! (HaveUHeard)
The Hoff Hustles! (GoFugYourself)
Happy National Orgasm Day! (Science2.0)
Couture Yeti walkabout! (Racked)
When Kanye met Twitter (Lainey)
Marky Mark makes his mark on Hollywood (GabbyBabble)
This is some hipster’s dream girl (ICYDK)
Just one more reason to love Jake Gyllenhaal (AnythingHollywood)
Daniel Radcliffe is now legal in every country but Saudi Arabia (EvilBeet)
Swede cops a move (DListed)
Drew Carey now 50% off! (DailyStab)
America is emo (CojoStyle)
She’s gonna have EPIC talks with Michael Jackson’s kids someday (AgentBedhead)
If it smells like a Fishburne, eat it (Crunk+Disorderly)
Snooki faw down, go boom (CelebritySmack)
Tom Jones is the king of sessy! (CelebDirtyLaundry)
Ali Lohan now enhanced by 20% (CeleBitchy)
Stephen Colbert’s bitchslap fest (BusyBeeBlogger)

Bardot’s Future Looks So Bright…

raincoaster — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 06:26:07 +0000

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why some people thought the Trout Pout was a good idea. If you’re thinking of telling your surgeon to do this, reflect for a moment, realize you are not Brigitte Bardot, and move on.

Inception Spoiler! (Lolebrity)
Feets Speaks! (raincoaster)
Courting scandal (Shoeblogs)
Celebrity Dad Faceoff: Christian Bale vs Liam Neeson (TeenyManolo)
Happy Birthday, baby! (ManoloBig)
Welcome to Diabeteez, NC (ManoloFood)
Book ‘em! (ManoloHome)
Using your head (ManoloBrides)
Tila Tequila, Dre, and some Juggalos walk into a bar… (AgentBedhead)
Cameron Diaz is a cow-renter (AmyGrindhouse)
Aaron Eckhart, my imaginary boyfriend, defends LA (BusyBeeBlogger)
Awww, Eli Roth took his little girl to Comic-Con! (CeleBitchy)
Apparition spotted in Brooklyn (CelebDirtyLaundry)
Bret Michaels is a noted herbologist (CelebritySmack)
Stallone vs Stallone (CityRag)
Don’t Hassel the King? (CojoStyle)
We can dream, can’t we? (DListed)
Say it isn’t so, Kelly Bundy! (EvilBeet)
Is it too much to ask that he’ll play the corpse? (GabbyBabble)
Project Runway giveaway (HaveUHeard)
And in return, Arizona is boycotting alt-rock (INeedMyFix)
Jennifer Garner and Russell Brand barebacking (JustJared)
Eva Mendes, chicken hawk (MovieLine)
Tiffany and Debbie Gibson in the catfight of the year (SeriouslyOMG)

Hump Day Links: The Hoff in the Hat edition

raincoaster — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 11:26:12 +0000

Let’s give it up for the hardest-working man in no business: the virtually unemployable yet always indomitable David Hasselhoff! Yes, the look may say “ageing gangster gigolo” but it’s a look to which I’ve been partial ever since that Star Trek episode where they went back to the Twenties. The shoes! The hats! The loud, loud suits!

Jennifer Aniston has the hardest-working plumbing in showbusiness (Lolebrity)

Lin Yu Chun and William Shatner completely work over Total Eclipse of the Heart (raincoaster)

Hardest-working Pratt in PR (AmyGrindhouse)

Hard labour in Hollywood (BusyBeeBlogger)

Ebert’s wife is the hardest-working spouse in tv (CeleBitchy)
Want to work hard for internet glory? (CelebrityBeehive)
Jessica Simpson too lazy for basic hygiene (CelebDirtyLaundry)
The hardest-working gossipeuse on Ustream (CelebritySmack)
Work hard for immortal mayhem! (Virgin)
It’s hard work, burying your soon-to-be-ex-husband alive (CelebToast)
Scott Baio works hard at being a twit (CityRag)
Jennifer Lopez just doesn’t work hard enough at Teh Fab (CojoStyle)
The hardest-working broodmare in the reality tv stable (DailyStab)
Do you want to work for Glee? Or just plain old money? (FirstClassFashionista)
Brenda wants to struggle! (FourFour)
JSimp shows off the hardest-working Spanx in fashion (GabbyBabble)
Peaches is the hardest-working junkie Scientologist celebuspawn starfarker in Coachella (Gawker)
Jennifer Hudson is working something out (GoFugYourself)
Rihanna’s Rib Recovers from exhaustion at hospital (HaveUHeard)
American Idiots spend hard-earned dollars on tickets to Broadway shows calling them idiots; how stupid is that? (INeedMyFix)
A Britney blogger’s work is never done (PoorBritney)
After all that work, you need your rest (IBBB)
It’s hard out here for a pimp (LitelySalted)
Busey wants you to WORK, lazy grocery imps! (Manolo)
James Cameron has been working WAY too hard (Movieline)
Glee does its Madonna homework (work) (PinkIsTheNewBlog)
Who’s been working hard? (UKPopSugar)
It’s cruel to put Zombie Bea Arthur to work! (PopBytes)
Secretariat has some guns! (SeriouslyOMG)
The Heat is On…Jake Gyllenhaal (TenGossip)

How’s your New Year going so far?

raincoaster — Fri, 01 Jan 2010 10:42:43 +0000

We’ve already had the first hoax of 2010, one which strikes close to the heart of the Manolo himself! You must not meddle with forces you do not understand, o hoaxers, lest ye find yerselves in a Vegas Lounge in the third circle of Hell.

Dorothy Parker has a sad.

But of course, it was not, and the Hoff lives on, to populate gossip columns and trailer parks everywhere with his music and the vague scent of apple blossoms coming from his skin-tight trousers.

As Nietzsche would say, we get the celebrities we deserve, people.