Ayyyy!

Gwyneth Paltrow wears what the Manolo tells her to (JustJared)

Renee Zellweger, charter member, Starfuckers Incorporated (DailyStab)

Elisabeth Hasselbeck and My Little Pony: which one of these is slumming? (CandyKirby)

Shia LaBoeuf may or may not have gotten lucky(? if you call it that) (WendyWayrad)

John Cusack refers Paul Leydon to the hand (JeanJacketsBad)

Bloody Hell! Pete Doherty is insane (SeriouslyOMGWTF)

JLo goes all, like, Alpha Mommy on Nicole Richie (IBBB)

Adrien Brody is marrying retired Aunt Selma from Miami Beach? (ImNotObsessed)

Flat busted: Amy Winehouse arrested (People)

Ellen DeGeneris gently gyno-probes Ashlee Simpson (CelebritySmack)

Harrison Ford’s Brazilliant deforestation PSA/man-on-man chest waxing video (Defamer)

Celebrity cosmetic surgery slideshow (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

Betty and Veronica: still best frenemies (CounterfeitChic)

Madonna is a natural beauty on “Today.” And what planet? (DListed)

Mariah Carey to turn Empire State Building gay (HollywoodRag)

Heidi Fleiss on her high horse again (WOWReport)

The happy(?) couple: Carmen Electra and Rock Himbo #3 pose for engagement pix (Websters)

Encounters with Seth Green (Mollygood)

Jonas Brothers kill and bury Elvis Costello, Johnny Cash’s musical cred (MTVBuzzworthy)

Clay Aiken thinks people from Omaha are stupid (EvilBeet)

Rachel Zoe is one cougar who never changes her spots (GoFugYourself)

Scientology teaches Katie Holmes to speak in tongues (CeleBitchy)

Scientology’s niece speaks! (AgentBedhead)

Ellen DeGeneris: puppy re-purposer, strikebreaker! (PerezHilton)

Fabio vs Clooney, hunkfight (InTouch)

Stella McCartney vs Heather Mills, bitchfight (GalleryOfTheAbsurd)

Evangeline Lilly and her hobbit are finito (HolyCandy)

Britney Spears is still picking up KFed’s tabs (DerekHail)

Jessica Simpson wants a Boston man (ImNotObsessed)

Jessica Simpson apparently believes Owen Wilson is a Boston man (UsMagazine)

Victoria Beckham on Ugly Betty clip (HolyMoly)

Are Angie and her bodyguard getting physical? (PopBytes)

Dog the Bounty Hunter didn’t know he was white, racist (Celebslam)

Michael Jackson thinks he’s still black (CelebritySmack)

Kate Moss has British teeth (TheMeatScale)

Pete Doherty is stoned again, rehabbing again, sorry again (AgentBedhead)

Matthew McConaughey’s moose knuckle (CityRag)

Britney Spears might be pregnant again! (InCaseYouDidntKnow)

Naked Harry Potter is coming! (GabbyBabble)

The return of the X-Files (Variety)

The most psychotic pie chart ever created (Gawker)

The Britney Spears comeback roundup (Defamer)

Alan Cumming, the gay Martha Stewart (AgentBedhead)

Reese and Jake: beauty and the beast (HolyCandy)

Craig, Daniel Craig signs on for another Bond (EvilBeet)

Gwen Stefani, Kingston, and Gavin Rossdale trick or treat (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Don Vito, done (BricksAndStones)

is Ellen DeGeneris JLo or Maude? (DailyStab)

RuPaul makes a hotter Maude, though (DListed)

Stephen Colbert, America’s Hope, Democratic Candidate (CeleBitchy)

Queen Latifah on her breast reduction (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

Ire d’ivoire: the mammoth ivory war! (CounterfeitChic)

Hillary will not Vogue! Don’t ask her (Jezebel)

Roberto Cavalli collection: when animals attack (hookers)! (NYT)

Big Brother South African scandal (TheFirstPost)

Lance Bass, married man! (CelebritySmack)

One stands accused of playing pass the mutt, the other readily admits to playing pass the butt.

Marie Osmond: no longer a ringer for Yvonne DeCarlo (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

Pink sees red (CelebSlam)

Tara Reid’s liver cries UNCLE! (TheSkinny)

Reese and Jake go public (I’mNotObsessed)

Colin Farrell, bored at Borders (DailyStab)

Britney’s frenemies boycott her album (Yeeeah)

Did Halle Berry just destroy her career? She thinks so (CelebWarship)

Britney Spears, Road Warrior, gets another notch (GoneHollywood)

Ellen DeGeneris, Dog Launderer (GossipOrTruth)

Is Carmen Electra wearing an Amanda Bynes costume? (PopBytes)

We, the people, believe Britney Spears should be First Lady of France (BuckHollywood)

Oprah’s dark, sexy past (GabbyBabble)

Mariah Carey gets waxed onstage (HolyCandy)

Heidi Fleiss is hiring (EvilBeet)

Attack of the soap star! (WOWreport)

Denise Richards is a witch; surprise! (Gabsmash)

Celebrity Jack-o-lanterns: Britney Spears (GalleryOfTheAbsurd)

Johnny Depp paints a portrait of love (ICYDK)

TomKat & Suri don’t buy this global warming guff (CelebrityBabyScoop)

The Manliest Man’s Man on the planet! (AskMen)

California Fire Coverage: Save the Soaps! (Defamer)

Willie Nelson’s celebrity tractor race (Stillisstillmoving)

If a sex doll could sing, it would sound like this (MrTabloid)

Celebrity houses in Malibu wildfire danger (I’mNotObsessed)

Nicole Kidman, fattie (HolyMoly)

Kate Moss, fattie (TheSkinnyWebsite)

Hayden Panettiere, fattie (CelebSlam)

Britney Spears, fattie (TheMeatScale)

Paris Hilton, popsicle (AgentBedhead)

Zac Efron, cutie (JustJared)

Jessica Biel, Martian (CelebritySmack)

Britney Spears, bikini-buff (DailyStab)

Ellen DeGeneris, serial dog regifter (Yeeeah)

Jake Gyllenhaal, toilet connoisseur (BricksAndStones)

Anderson Cooper, built (LARagMag)

Marie Osmond, unconscious (Defamer)

Kirstie Alley, cheater (CelebrityBabylon)

Jennifer Hudson, bridesmaid (GoFugYourself)

Bo Duke, hunk(HolyCandy)

Tyra Banks, fierce (YoungBlackAndFabulous)

Dumbledore, gay (Popwatch)

Sorry, it was there. I had to use it.

Larry Craig and the Village People get their groove on! (Disembedded)

Celebrities love Mr. Bones (Jezebel)

Life after Xena for Lucy Lawless (AgentBedhead)

LiLo’s new BF jilted his fiance for her (with bonus mug shot goodness) (CelebritySmack)

Pamela Anderson as: Hooker Bride Barbie! (DailyStab)

Colin Farrell and Natalie Portman do good (GlitteratiGossip)

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, not so good (GoFugYourself)

Donald Trump disses George Clooney and Angelina Jolie. Start the countdown to the assassination (HolyCandy)

LAPD investigates Orlando Bloom’s car crash (I’mNotObsessed)

Raising Suri Cruise by the book: Dianetics (CelebrityDirtyLaundry)

Michael Jackson on Kid Nation? Uh, so to speak. (JustJared)

Hayden Panettiere and Milo Ventimiglia not dating (OK)

Victoria Beckham cracks a smile (PerezHilton)

Kate Moss debuts her Joan Collins tribute collection (MollyGood)

Taye Diggs hotter even when goofy than any man you know (PopSugar)

Ellen DeGeneris releases the hounds (TMZ)

Kimora Lee Simmons, Russell Simmons, their kids, and Djimon Hounsou at the Pumpkin Patch (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Paris Hilton dumps another one (TheRadReport)

Celebrities cheat on their taxes too! (TheJellyfisher)

Debra Messing’s got a new job (Seriously?OMG!WTF?)

Amy Winehouse scalps Romanian orphans (AgentBedhead)

Steve-O for PETA, animal magnetism (CelebritySmack)

Lonelygirl15 @ Pinkberry, Beverley Hills (CelebrityPuke)

Ann Coulter, 46, hacked (DListed)

Stephen Colbert is running for President (EvilBeet)

Diddy, P.Diddy, Puff Daddy, all to be charged with assault (GabbyBabble)

Ellen DeGeneres has a puppy-themed meltdown (Defamer)

JK Rowling bra not-so-much-slip-as-landslide (GoFugYourself)

Jon Voight is heartbroken over Angelina and James (HolyCandy)

Sheryl Crow launches new line (I’mNotObsessed)

LiLo drives the paparazzi wild(er) (PerezHilton)

LOLsen twins (Mollygood)

Jodie Foster will not be contained! (TheMeatScale)

Ebony and Ivory: Mya and Anna Kournikova (YoungBlackAndFabulous)

Spice Girls @ Victoria’s Secret (DailyStab)

Amy Winehouse in the Zoo (Yeeeah)