Ayyyy! » Euro

Agent Bedhead

raincoaster — Tue, 06 Mar 2012 02:12:33 +0000

Eva Green

It’s always so cute when little girls play dress-up, but somebody needs to tell Eva here that Mommy’s Slutty Friend’s makeup doesn’t go with Daddy’s Downlow Friend trousers.

Hump Day Hunk: Benedict Cumberbatch

raincoaster — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 11:31:37 +0000

Benedict Cumberbatch

Don’t say I never did nuthin’ for ya…that is, if ya are an Anglophilic Sherlock Holmes fan who just can’t get enough of your literate and literary pin-up boy. Here he is, keepin’ it real in the Inner City.

Moriarty, by the way, is also real, or so we hear.

Slightly-Delayed Friday Caption Contest: Waisting Away

raincoaster — Sun, 12 Feb 2012 05:56:15 +0000

Behold the “glories” of Romanian model and poor liar Ioana Spangenberg, who claims she eats three big meals a day. I remember when Marie Osmond was boasting of a “natural” twenty inch waist” too; those were the days she was eating one apple a day and throwing it up, and she’s not five six. Nor, frankly, are many models who don’t work on fetish sites. Do your best/worst to the Human Skeleton in the comments, and points will be lost for obviousness for anyone who posts “eat a sammich.”

SAMMICH, girl. Dayum! Your elbow shouldn't be the widest part of your arm

French for Beginners, with Jean Dujardin

raincoaster — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 16:05:08 +0000

Jean Dujardin has a point to make

Why Jean, that’s quite a good point you make. What’s more, it reminds me of something…

Welcome to Hump Day, y’all!

Friday Caption Contest: Vanessa Paradis

raincoaster — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 12:19:54 +0000

From my new favoritest blog, the horrifying and delightful Celebrity Closeups. Do what you do best in the captions:

Vanessa Paradis up close and extremely personal

Mrs. Brown’s Bad Brazilian: Bring the Brain Bleach

raincoaster — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 08:00:45 +0000

How I love the interwebs. You could just be minding your own business, trawling the celebusphere for evidence of poor accessorizing amongst the Kardashian Klan when suddenly, you’re confronted with the world’s most compelling BEFORE picture: stark evidence that while our fascination with glamour may result in some remarkable transformations, that these do not come without pain or their share of ugliness.

On that note, let me present to you what has been described as “the funniest skit in tv history,” Mrs Brown’s Bikini Wax from RTÉ Television in Ireland.

Looks like a dead badger on flypaper.

What a tit.

raincoaster — Tue, 13 Dec 2011 03:05:15 +0000

what a tit

Sure. It makes total sense to me. She’s the wife of an executive at Rovio, which produces app juggernaut Angry Birds, and she just wanted to fly the flag for her husband’s company. Makes total sense.

But why is she wearing the pasty on the outside?

Bullfighting, Canadian Style!

raincoaster — Thu, 14 Jul 2011 08:02:31 +0000

As you’ve probably heard, the Royal Couple was recently up here in Canuckistan, and as is traditional, we demonstrated for them all the colourful local customs like street hockey, kayaking, the use of the Oxford Comma, and the preparation and consumption of Kraft Dinner.

And, of course, the Canadian Bullfights.

Bullfights Canadian Style

Let nobody say we’re unfriendly! That silly paparazzo didn’t have a clue how to play this game. Fortunately, the Royals had indeed read their cheat sheet and knew just how to divert the bull’s attention.

Yoohoo, Moose! How about them Canucks, eh?

Also: Unreported fact about their visit to Yellowknife: Prince William took three shots at the net in street hockey. The goalie was pretty good, and snagged the first two balls, but the third ball ricocheted off the frame of the net and hit a photographer in the … sports equipment.

Your intrepid reporter was there.

and now, an apocalyptic musical interlude

raincoaster — Thu, 07 Jul 2011 04:06:01 +0000

from my favorite French chanteuse, Mylene Farmer. Do you ever feel, particularly whilst perusing celebrity blogs, that you were drowning in froth? Then you will get this video, even if you can’t understand the words, which are translated over the jump.

Translation:

Bloody Monday
but what spreads glue over the planet
And clouds my comet

It’s
the law of series
The Styx

Problems are piling up
I’ve got a rubbish colour
But

It’s Instant X
We wait for as the Messiah
as the magic instant
The equation
ax+b that starts it
But by now, hey

Father Christmas, when you come down from heavens
some fun, some Zoprak drugs and wings
2000 will be spiritual
It’s written in “Elle”
Fun for the end of a century

In killer mood
It’s time for me to strike a pose
To think of something else

It’s the infernal cycle
Fatal
Small things turn to the Everest
My cat jumps through the window
When
When is Instant X
We wait for as the Messiah
As a magic instant
It’s a slaughter
Varnish cracking
Asphyxia
foot in the grave

Father Christmas when you come down from heavens
some fun, some Zoprak drugs and wings
2000 will be spiritual
It’s written in “Elle”
Fun for the end of a century

Selah.

Somehow this is Prince Harry’s fault

raincoaster — Tue, 19 Apr 2011 05:28:56 +0000

The Royal Wedding entrance like none other. My shameful past as a Prince Andrew fangirl with full-on subscriptions to Majesty AND The Royals comes out as I say the Princess Ann and Camilla lookalikes are really startlingly good, but the emo cynic within me comes out when I note that even the fake Prince Harry has way more fun than the fake Prince William, who has way more fun than either of the real ones.

Now, let’s toast these glorious ersatzii with (what else?) a Buck’s Fizz and some common gossip links.

Tee Many Martoonis (ManoloFood)

Spa No Go? Oh. (raincoaster)

Marilyn Monroe conquers the world! (Ayyyy)

Is this how the Spears family started? (Lolebrity)

Tom Cruise sees red (AgentBedhead)

And it turns out he’s not even related to Viggo! (BusyBeeBlogger)

Evan Rachel Wood lives up to his name (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Vanessa Hudgens in tampon chain fashion tragedy (CelebritySmack)

And then Trump asked for its birth certificate (CelebVIPLounge)

Joey Ramone lives on. On white trash (CityRag)

NPH has double trouble (DailyStab)

How many celebutards does it take to dance on the head of a mushroom? (DippedInCream)

Oh, Aniston, it’s SO mutual (EarSucker)

Mike Tyson is serious about this yoga thing, too (FitFabCeleb)

Elizabeth Hurley will never age. STOP IT ALREADY, BITCH! (GirlsTalkinSmack)

Let me get this straight…If you sleep under Miley Cyrus’ armpits, you will never have nightmares? (HaveUHeard)

JSimp wigs out (HollywoodHiccups)

Shack up with Glee! (INeedMyFix)

Royal Wedding rehearsal shocker! (MathewGuiver)

Nicki Minaj drops the dildo for Britney (PoorBritney)

Fergie drops the “D-List Bomb” on the TSA (PopBytes)

Huh? Seriously? Kirstie Alley was onstage at the same time? (Swoonworthy)

Miley Cyrus appears to have a shin cellulite problem??? (TheSkinny)