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Xtina’s BACK!

Christina Aguilera's back

Christina Aguilera's back

And we’ve got her. WAYYY too much of her for that outfit, in fact. But the clear support strap is intriguing: is this what they used to give Mariah a six pack? Looks like a clear plastic cheese wire, and we should all be grateful that Xtina’s leathery hide retained surface tension enough to fight it off.

Gold On Girl

Jennifer Lopez shines

Jennifer Lopez shines

Ladies and gentlemen, there are Hammer pants. And then there are JackHammer pants. These ones are giving me a headache.

Strange Creature Sighted in Florida

Phoebie Price

Phoebie Price

Not since the Creature from the Black Lagoon has the seashore shuddered at such a sight. Scientists are not sure what the creature is, exactly, although they have established that it is primarily composed of inorganic materials. And they’re pretty sure it had a bit part in Something About Mary.

Salma Hayek goes seepies

Salma Hayek PJs

Salma Hayek PJs

Ayyyy! Somebody alert the Manolo! Looks like Salma Hayek has got herself a job as a blogger!

Shoe Out

Shoe Out

Shoe Out

Fashion blogger Kate Schneider says she gets most of her fashion finds on sale. She neglected to specify how many of the other she got out of the back of Mummy’s closet.

If the shoe fits (and it’s nice) wear it. If it doesn’t, I hope you saved enough in the sale to pay for the broken neck you’re courting.

Agent Bedhead

Eva Green

Eva Green

It’s always so cute when little girls play dress-up, but somebody needs to tell Eva here that Mommy’s Slutty Friend’s makeup doesn’t go with Daddy’s Downlow Friend trousers.

Slightly-Delayed Friday Caption Contest: Waisting Away

Behold the “glories” of Romanian model and poor liar Ioana Spangenberg, who claims she eats three big meals a day. I remember when Marie Osmond was boasting of a “natural” twenty inch waist” too; those were the days she was eating one apple a day and throwing it up, and she’s not five six. Nor, frankly, are many models who don’t work on fetish sites. Do your best/worst to the Human Skeleton in the comments, and points will be lost for obviousness for anyone who posts “eat a sammich.”

SAMMICH, girl. Dayum!

SAMMICH, girl. Dayum! Your elbow shouldn't be the widest part of your arm

What a tit.

what a tit

what a tit

Sure. It makes total sense to me. She’s the wife of an executive at Rovio, which produces app juggernaut Angry Birds, and she just wanted to fly the flag for her husband’s company. Makes total sense.

But why is she wearing the pasty on the outside?

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