Ayyyy!

Picasso’s got a lot of dough (Lolebrity)

The problem with Pete Doherty’s crotch (AgentBedhead)

Jennifer Lopez does not care about your dying mom (Gawker)

The Fresh Prince of Calabasas goes back to high school (Defamer)

John McCain’s melanoma (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

The real-life blade runner wins Olympic appeal (Disembedded)

Nikki Cox’s incredible inflating face (Websters)

Gwyneth Paltrow is tall, gorgeous, and leaking (Jezebel)

Full-frontal fellas (DListed)

Party animals Pete Doherty and Amy Winehouse party with animals (SeriouslyOMG)

Brangelina’s kids are pregnant! (CandyKirby)

Denzel Washington gets the House of Wax treatment (ImNotObsessed)

Celebrity Dad Faceoff: Viggo vs Denzel (TeenyManolo)

Mischa Barton’s specialty underpants (DailyStab)

The Gary Busey trading card! (GalleryOfTheAbsurd)

Kiefer Sutherland…what was I saying? *swoon* (CityRag)

Paris Hilton in rickrack attack! (CelebritySmack)

NKOTB -> OKOTTV (Mollygood)

raincoaster haz a famus (FamousPeople)

Lance Armstrong picks up Owen Wilson’s sloppy seconds (PerezHilton)

Hey sci-fi fans, are you looking forward to the return of Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles? Its lead actress Lena Headey sure is - can’t you tell from her wistful expression how much she’s pining to get back into an unobtrusive tank top and pair of jeans?

Ladies, ladies, don’t believe all you hear about the worldwide shortage of fabric.  It’s just a myth concocted by the evil fashion industry to justify producing half a dress at twice the cost.  Now you know the truth, don’t be afraid to exercise your rights to a demure garment.  And if you’re ever in need of some cloth, I’m sure Janet Jackson will be only too happy to lend you a yard or two.

Hollywood’s worst beards (Defamer)

Captain James Tiberius Kirk will have none of your alien perversions, New Yorker! (Gawker)

You never live down the O-face (HearThis)

Happy Mothers Day from LeBron James (WithMalice)

Mr Big for sale, asks no inconvenient questions (AgentBedhead)

Vanessa Williams, BA (BlackCelebrityKids)

Hugh Hefner is a confirmed bachelor (DailyStab)

Famke Janssen is no breeder (ImNotObsessed)

Momentarily straight Drew Barrymore will hunt you down (ICYDK)

Maddox Jolie-Pitt is a swinger! (JustJared)

Sex and the Philip Treacy (GoFugYourself)

The mother of all power breeders strikes again: Britney pregnant? (CeleBitchy)

Colin Farrell, notch in Britney’s unchastity belt: hot or not? (UKPopSugar)

R Kelly (”The Defendant”) can dish it out but not take it (Bossip)

Clay Straitken haiku (Mollygood)

Isaiah Washington awfully princessy for straight man (WebstersIsMyBitch)

Tila Tequila, early bird AND worm (CelebritySmack)

Don’t you hate it when you’ve spent a whole afternoon trying to clobber together your most eyecatching combination of accessories, only to be outdone by the hat that ate Leicester Square?

Angelina’s family goes Goth for Mother’s Day (BlackCelebrityKids)

Jack White, rock god, superhero (AgentBedhead)

Suri Cruise and Brooklyn Beckham sitting in a tree… (Defamer)

Hip Hop outings: not exactly a trip to Radio City Music Hall (Gawker)

Ben- does not blame -nifer any longer (SeriouslyOMG)

Anna Wintour in couture Cthulhu (POTO)

Madonna is a diva? PERISH THE THOUGHT! (DailyStab)

Busted! Slutty prom dress brings arrest from the (fashion) police (CelebritySmack)

Happy Mother’s Day to two of Hollywood’s finest (CandyKirby)

Hayden Panettiere happy to play for the other team (ImNotObsessed)

Wino of the Woods (DListed)

Kiefer cuffed! (JustJared)

Jenna Bush’s wedding photos (CeleBitchy)

Brad Pitt’s new body art (SplashNews)

Retouch My Body: the video! (PerezHilton)

Winehouse walks the streets (Mollygood)

La Toya Jacksanity (SeriouslyOMG)

Nicolette Sheridan exudes fabulousness (Celebslam)

America’s next top freak (IBBB)

Madonna Global Media Domination Tour (JensJuice)

Tom Cruise loses his Packer (AgentBedhead)

Ginger Spice and the Goth Lesbian of Doom (ImNotObsessed)

Britney Spears and Big Sur (DailyStab)

Play the Celebrity Cosmetic Surgery Game! (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

Daydream Believer in the magic of Davy Jones Karaoke (Defamer)

Amy Winehouse is a commuter’s worst nightmare (CelebritySmack)

Pot/Kettle Pot/Potkettle What I mean to say is Ashlee/Britney (CeleBitchy)

Uma Thurman’s lawyer will butt-rape France (InTouch)

Mariah and Mr Mariah have been inseparable since marrying last week. Uh, thanks for that, PR machine (PopSugar)

Beverly Hills Chihuahua! (DListed)

Somebody takes the Link Challenge to a new, post-literary level (CelebritySmack)

The twiglets strike back: celeb on pap violence (Defamer)

Sienna Miller flees the country after Pap Attack (PopSugar)

All hail Zombie Captain America! (AgentBedhead)

Guess the celebrity rack! (Derober)

Marilyn Manson is trying to kill Evan Rachel Wood (ImNotObsessed)

Kylie Minogue spins her web of domination, brings executioners (StyleDash)

Perez Hilton to assault your closet! (OK!)

The Amy Winehouse on Crack Rampage Show airs a new episode (Radar)

Amy Winehouse on Crack Rampage Show moved to new location: lockup (DailyStab)

Pregnant Old Nicole Kidman knifed in back by Amelie actress (CeleBitchy)

Kelly Osbourne attacks an innocent sidewalk and a defenceless wall (DListed)

Grand Theft Auto wipes out the competition (LifeLine)

Pete Doherty will kill him (SeriouslyOMG)

Lindsay Lohan is mean, ugly (PopSugar)

Karl Lagerfeld is a gun-toting seal. Get Kiefer Sutherland to club him already! (GoFugYourself)

Old pinko hippie vegan to give away album, singlehandedly crush recording industry (PerezHilton)

Something tells me that Mischa Barton and Margherita Missoni aren’t exactly the best of chums.  After all, true friends don’t let each other go out dressed like that, do they?

I gather that high society and celebrity like to come together once a year to have one last hurrah for their most hideous frocks before they are consigned to the giant closet in the sky. So - burn, bury or bin - which will it be for a lucky three, dear readers? The choice is entirely yours. 

In this day and age of sustainable awareness, it’s rather disappointing to see a famous designer like Donna Karan promoting the idea of wearing 50% more dress than necessary. How thoroughly irresponsible when something with that much fabric could clothe an entire runway of supermodels! For all we know, she could also be carrying around noxious carbon emissions in that fanny pack of hers.  Thank goodness for the new generation of ecologically responsible celebrities like Mischa Barton who are trying to make a difference through the power of recycling.

The Good Soldier: Link challenge accepted (AgentBedhead)

NHL/Hollywood doppelgangers (Defamer)

Hey, big spender! TomKat blows $100,000 on Suri’s birthday party (GabbyBabble)

Smelling a trend: Julia Roberts is “naturally fragrant” (Ecorazzi)

Kelly Clarkson is a naturist (TheBlemish)

Paris Hilton doesn’t stay at the Moscow Hilton, got banned from Moscow Hyatt (TheRadReport)

Spears Family a living example of laissez-faire divinity (WendyWayrad)

A waiting world salivates: OJ Simpson vs Donald Trump on Celebrity Apprentice! (AgentBedhead)

Harriet Carter and the penis leaker? (IBBB)

Laurie Anderson finally makes an honest man of Lou Reed (CelebWarship)

Miley Cyrus, literatus? (People)

Will Ferrell still willing to work with children (DailyStab)

The Revenge of Grace Jones: hot male celebs who look like lesbians (CityRag)

That’s so Orlando Brown: star goes missing (BittenAndBound)

Also missing: Lake Bell’s neck (WebstersIsMyBitch)

MarkeyMarkMarkIII (ImNotObsessed)

Mariah Carey not a breeder: call from Alicia Keys on line #1? (CelebritySmack)

Elijah Wood in: Sex and the Spaghetti (CandyKirby)

Amy Winehouse is British youth’s top heroin heroine (NewMusicExpress)

Kumar goes to U Penn without Harold! (Celebitchy)

Rachel McAdams is a Genius Barfly (JustJared)

Michelle Williams is haunted by the ghost of Heath Ledger? (Mollygood)

American Idol, kiss, KISS (PrettyOnTheOutside)

Tila Tequila has a series and Paris Hilton doesn’t: justice? (Dlisted)