Ayyyy!

Robert Downey Jr is a cunning linguist (Jossip)

Amy Winehouse doesn’t have a leg to stand on, almost (WendyWayrad)

NKOTB are miracle workers! (AgentBedhead)

Lindsay Lohan parties with fellow leggings abuser (DailyStab)

Simon Cowell and Ryan Seacrest’s Tryst night (DListed)

Ellen Page (1 nomination, 0 Oscars) severely disses Jane Fonda (6 nominations, 2 Oscars) (Defamer)

Courtney Love’s purse pharmacy (Yeeeeah)

Jeri Ryan Seacrest, Pamela Anderson Cooper, and Boy George Bush (PrettyOnTheOutside)

Disney Superstar goes naked Down Under (CircusHour)

74 reasons to hate TMZ (Gawker)

More than you needed to know about Roseanne Barr’s ladyparts (CelebritySmack)

Doogie Howser hates Britney Spears (WebstersIsMyBitch)

Jamie-Lynn Spears hurt in drunken brawl (CeleBitchy)

Gangland rumbles reach new low: nursery school (Bossip)

Aging Canadian surgical curiosity and sex cougar invited to White House (ICYDK)

Simon Cowell haunts Maternity wards to bathe his skin in life-giving placenta (HollywoodRag)

Halle Berry is a golf fanatic? (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Your dose of downer: Celebrity incomes (HuffPo)

Posh Spice and the Adams family (JustJared)

Natalie Portman’s boyfriend Devendra Banhart: hawt or nawt? (Defamer)

Renee Zellweger’s true nature revealed at last! (CelebritySmack)

Renee gets it half-right (Yeeeeah)

Britney cleverly avoids tan lines, personal dignity (Cityrag)

But she DOES put out for charity: $25,000 on her Amex (PopSugar)

MILF vs MILF: Hurley/Paltrow edition (Bastardly)

No, you cannot get in George Clooney’s pants (HuffPo)

The ULTIMATE purse dog (CounterfeitChic)

Nicole Richie is fed up with Paris “Me Too” Hilton (HollywoodBackwash)

Only 40 people in the world want to be Paris’ friend (CeleBitchy)

ScarJo and RyRey have a fight (ICYDK)

Married man caught on film kissing Hillary and NO it’s not Bill! (AgentBedhead)

Pete Doherty has no friends; Kate Moss has no class (HolyMoly)

Mariah Carey says she has low self-esteem, demonstrates unsuspected gift for sidesplitting comedy (DailyStab)

Sandra Bullock is on the run from … wait for it … CANADA! (ImNotObsessed)

Joanie loves orgasms! (DListed)

Vanilla Ice put on ice (JustJared)

Britney Spears is Blanche DuBois in the new Moby musical A Streetcar Named Batshiat (CircusHour)

Alicia Keys is a conspiracy theorist (POTP)

RIP Cedella Booker. Say hi to your son Bob Marley when you get to the other side (CelebrityDirt)

Melanie Griffith’s kid is no Rumer Willis (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Padma Lakshmi models the Ed’s Linens Collection (GoFugYourself)

Hollywood flashback to 1999 (FilmExperience)

Reality tv kills four (Mollygood)

In addition to Barack Obama’s democratic nomination, Jane Fonda supports a number of important causes.  At a glance these include the unfettered right to wear 10 shades of brown, put your skirt through the shredder and showcase every souvenir you bought at your last exotic tourist destination.

As Vanessa Carlton found out to her detriment, this is what happens when you surrender the production of a little black dress to a pre-schooler with limited pattern cutting credentials.  Should have gone for one of those Japanese kids - they’ve got mad kirigami skills!

Jenna Bush O-Face (Webster’s)

20 most expensive celebrity divorces (CustomizedGirl)

Amy Winehouse is not exactly “clean, green power” (Yeeeeah)

Brad Pitt is not black enough! (PopOnThePop)

We have a Scientologist DOWN! Repeat: we have a Scientologist DOWN! (TheBlemish)

Former child star begins the long slide into bankruptcy, boozing, and B&E’s (AgentBedhead)

It’s La Pequeña’s world. We just live in it (Dlisted)

George Clooney keeps a lid on it (JustJared)

JC Chasez does not Chace Crawford (Mollygood)

Gold digger headed straight for the center of the Earth (DailyStab)

Win a date with Barack Obama! (Stereohyped)

Someone needs to tell Demi Moore it’s just a metaphor (ImNotObsessed)

Lucy Liu wants to be a WASP fashionista popsicle zombie (ICYDK)

Top Model walks? (Defamer)

Most historically inaccurate films (YahooMovies)

Robin Williams soon to be EX-Mrs.Doubtfire (ExtraTV)

Artificial Sweetener Valley High (Gawker)

Tom Cruise and John Travolta abducted by aliens! (CircusHour)

At American Idol, every moment is happy hour (GoFugYourself)

If at first you don’t succeed (and indeed, fail quite miserably) then try, try again.  Never quit mixing and matching it up Juliette, one day you’re bound to find the right outfit for your favourite set of accessories! But in the mean time you might wanna stay at home, away from errant gusts of wind and the general public. 

Bar raised (Defamer)

Hammer dropped (AgentBedhead)

Lohan smashed (CrazyDaysAndNights)

Rick, rolled (Guardian)

Rowling potty? (Celebitchy)

Hunky Jesus (Mike Responts)

Presley poisoned! (GabbyBabble)

Hunk drunk (ASocialitesLife)

Carey doubt? (Bossip)

Amy Outhouse (Yeeeeah)

Nice…Spaniards (ImNotObsessed)

Manilow? NO! (SeriouslyOMGWTF)

Owen’s pickup (Popsugar)

Malthusian Catastrophe (Websters)

Mutual bonding (IDLYITW)

Alba time (DailyStab)

Go-Go’s gone (CelebritySmack)

Cognitive dissonance (CircusHour)

Infomercials: WTF? (LiquidGeneration)

After months of speculation which had us chewing our nails down to little nubs, our favourite manufactured reality girl group Danity Kane is all set to fire up again with the release of their new album Welcome to the Dollhouse. Group member Aubrey O’Day recently gave an interview expounding on everything we ever wanted to know, like who takes the longest in the bathroom, is she still carrying Diddy’s love child and is their new album just a whole lot of stylised grinding and moaning:

We’re very proud of that fact because we took control over the way we wanted this album to come out. Is it heavily sexual? Absolutely not. You happened to mention the songs that are a little more edgy, but nothing is a blunt sexual statement. It’s more of a tease. Everything is like, “I’m a woman, hear me roar. And if you want to hear me roar, you may have to come prove to me you’re worthy.” I think that’s a good message to send to women.

As opposed to the message being sent out below which roughly translates into “A rich and powerful man controls my career so you better be damn sure I’m going to wear whatever he picks out for me in his lamest fantasies.”

Celebs know you hate them (Gawker)

We’ve lost Will Smith (Defamer)

Conan the Late Night Barbarian (Cityrag)

Kelly Clarkson is a Commando! (DailyStab)

Who’d you rather? Luck of the drunkish game (LiquidGeneration)

50 animals with drinking problems (BestWeekEver)

Heather Mills gets nearly $50 million, makes her daughter fly coach anyway (Celebitchy)

Cindy Crawford’s beach house like a Russian nesting doll (Celebslam)

Full Frontal Friday (NSFW! and Jim Carrey is on there!) (CrazyDaysAndNights)

The end of Abba (GlitteratiGossip)

Divorce is pricey, y’all! (EvilBeet)

Michael Stipe’s closet has a revolving door (Dlisted)

Breaking: Ashton Kutcher is decorative (ImNotObsessed)

Orlando Bloom’s face suitable for scrubbing pans in a diner. Still decorative, though (Popsugar)

Pussycat Doll wears Mom Jeans! (TheGrumpiest)

Nicole Richie is as sick of Paris Hilton as everyone else (CelebritySmack)

Heather Mills is psychostylin’ (GoFugYourself)

Britney Spears in: Mad Max, Beyond Thunderthighs! (Yeeeeah)

Celebrities who look like leprechauns (CircusHour)

Halle Berry had her baby girl (PerezHilton)

Imagine my look of abject horror upon discovering my internet connection was down yesterday. Trapped — a prisoner locked away from the online world!  Thankfully order has been restored, allowing me to sensibly reflect upon the past 24 hours and concede it was really only a disaster of minor proportions unlike what’s happening with Miss Raven Symone below.

Operation Reznorgasm complete! (AgentBedhead)

Mary Ann not into Maryjane (Defamer)

The Bad Boys of Blogging vs Beloved B-Listers (Jezebel)

Happy COMPLETELY INSANE Birthday, Tom Cruise (Gawker)

Fabio is completely secure in his masculinity (Cityrag)

Patrick Swayze is still on the cancer sticks (Popbytes)

Miley Cyrus is, like, a total brainiac, rilly (GabbyBabble)

Kevin Federline is Dirty Thirty (BittenAndBound)

ScarJo is not a cheap date (HotMommaGossip)

Judd Nelson candid…the Eighties are definitely OVER (TMZ)

Welcome to the jungle. Lilo keeps the Eighties alive (which explains why they’re still dead) (Yeeeeah)

Your token Irish beefcake for St.Patrick’s Dale. Pale and slightly fatty (WebstersIsMyBitch)

Nicole Kidman needs to trank up her bodyguards (Celebritysmack)

Helen Mirren is MORE sexy (JustJared)

If Obama were white, if Clinton were black (TheNewRepublic)

Charlize Theron accepts America (ImNotObsessed)

Britney erases Kabbalah  (CelebWarship)

Kate Bosworth has David Bowie eyes (Egotastic)

The Heather Locklear suicide call mess sorted out (Celebitchy)

Madonna is trying too hard (DailyStab)

P Puff Diddy Daddy starts a cab service for the A-list (CelebParasite)

Catherine Zeta-Jones gives quotes she’ll come to regret (PerezHilton)

Now that the weather is warming up in your neck of the woods, think about installing a few layers of fetching foil-backed insulation around your body. So cooling, you’ll need matching armwarmers to ward off those goosebumps!