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Wednesday Caption Contest: Cicely Tyson Edition

If you can’t wear this to the Tony Awards, were CAN you wear it? You know what to do, so do it in the captions for fabulous, completely imaginary prizes.

Cicely Tyson at the Tony Awards

Cicely Tyson at the Tony Awards

 

I see Paris, I see France, what the HELL?

Paris Hilton likes to feel a breeze everywhere

Paris Hilton likes to feel a breeze everywhere, by which I don’t mean Hawaii, Cannes, etc

I almost lost a bet when pictures of Paris Hilton flashing her underwear surfaced. Drunken Stepfather didn’t lose a bet, but he DID lose his grip when he saw the unmistakable upskirt shot, seemingly proving that the former amateur porn star has changed her ways, no longer the commando cutie, source of countless barstool snail trails.

As with everything Paris Hilton, however, all is not how it first appears. The Daily Mail inadvertently revealed that the “dress” was just a cover-up, and that the “actual underpants that Paris Hilton wears now” were really just a bikini from another part of the photoshoot. They returned immediately to their normal reliable reporting, however, by calling this two-tone bikini “monochrome.”

Taxes, Death, and Paris Hilton, ladies and gentlemen.

Sailor Man

Sailor Man

Sailor Man

“I want to give society an element of surprise and impact and I want to cheerfully enliven Japan.”

Mission accomplished. Never change, Japan. Never, ever change.

 

RuPaul is Divalicious!

Ru vs Cindy

Ru vs Cindy, I think we can call this one for the Queen.

All hail the (drag) Queen! And all hail our good friends at World of Wonder, who’ve created this glorious extravaganza of sequinned fabulousity: a YouTube video of every one of RuPaul’s be-gowned catwalks from the five seasons of RuPaul’s Drag Race. This, ladies and gentlemen, is the YouTube for which competitive reality television was invented.

Friday Caption Contest Results: Cannes Recycle Edition

It’s time to announce the winner of our gloriously-resurrected Friday Caption Contest. It really was a good round with some fresh entries, but in the end There Can Be Only One.

This is a green dress, no really

This is a green dress, no really

Klee May 18, 2013 at 10:31 pm #

“the deadliest catch” teams up with “project runway” to create the flotsam collection for fall 2013. Make it work!

Congratulations and imaginary swag to Klee! For her hypothetical trophy of virtual awesomeness, we present this antique bejewelled Fish Bangle Bracelet.

Fish Bracelet

This would actually work really well with that dress

Friday Caption Contest: Cannes Recycle!

You know what to do. Do it in the comments for fabulous, completely imaginary prizes!

This is a green dress, no really

This is a green dress, no really in a way

I believe this is the first time the red carpet at Cannes has played host to any garment made from plastic foam muffin pans, but then there’s a first for everything.

Carey Mulligan Cannes do!

Carey Mulligan Cannes do!

Carey Mulligan Cannes do!

Yet another snap from a Cannes photocall, in this case for the Great Gatsby (or the Mediocre Gatsby if you believe the reviewers). In this shot, director Baz Luhrmann congratulates Carey Mulligan on her brilliant re-purposing of an ironing board cover and a pair of maternity pants.

Who Wore it Better: Robin Williams or Kim Kardashian?

Robin Williams wins the internet today.

And as if simple visuals weren’t enough to snag him the victory cup in this playoff, it’s doubtful he’s ever lied about being a Size Four.

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