Prince Heidi Ho

HRH Prince Harry of Great Britain. Harry, short for Heidi, apparently. Dare we hope Heidi Ho?

Philip Treacy Chinoiserie

Philip Treacy is to hats what his oft-biz-partner (you have to specify nowadays) Alexander McQueen was to dresses: a supreme genius and a complete loonbat. Fabulous.

Here is his latest show from London Fashion Week. Dibs on the crazy multi-coloured feathered thingy with the iridescent train. Yes, a hat with a train: how could I resist? Although the large double wheel of pheasant feathers is also attractive, but probably only because the way the model is walking the front row of plumes is bouncing left when the back row is bouncing right. I’d have to buy her, and get her to wear it all the time, and what would be the fun in that? Actually, if he could make a leash that matched…hmmm.

Anyway, here’s your video. Sorry most of the captions for the Friday Caption Contest got caught by the spam filter over the weekend. I will have it taken out back and shot, I assure you. Prize presentation just as soon as I’m caught up on sleep!

Watch while you enjoy thumbing through a coffee table book of his best. Actually, they are sort of hats that were always waiting to be in coffee table books, don’t you think?

We’re slowly catching up on our imaginary-prize-giving for the Caption Contests. Come back with us to an earlier time. A simpler time. A significantly less fabulous time: the Nineties!

Nirvana and RuPaul

They were, without question, the worst Supremes cover band of all time.

Congratulations and imaginary swag to igirl99, a second-time winner, if my memory does not fail me. For her victory, we shall award her a case of black smudge stick eye liner from Stila and the very plaid, very 90′s Eugenia Kim black and beige ‘Sammy’ trooper hat from Bluefly.

Smells like…VICTORY!

Helen Mirren and Judi Dench take over the WORLD

It’s their world. We just live in it. Sure, sure, only one of them has reproduced, but just think how much greater the world would be if we all had a little of that DNA.

Even though he seems to be shorter than I always thought, you still don’t want to piss off Buster Keaton. Not only could the guy throw a punch, but he also knows exactly what looks good on him. Enjoy this delightful little video of a youthful Keaton being taken hat shopping by his burly, bullying father. Who wouldn’t look good unless you put a bag over his face, but that’s neither here nor there.

Michael Fassbender

Dapper just always works. Dapper plus Irish really works. Dapper plus Irish plus physical perfection…well, excuse us a minute. We need some “alone time.”

Yes, the holiday season is upon us. And just because your show was cancelled years ago and you’ve really never come into your own since, that’s no reason not to dress for celebration. And captioning.

Spike is sad he missed out on that part in Bridget Jones's Diary

Lady Gaga is all about the gheys

Lady Gaga has a lot on her mind lately. In related news, science has once again confirmed the link between the brains of gay males and straight females.