Every now and then the interwebs show you something so breathtakingly perfect that you have to stop cold and simply admire in silent awe.
I refer, of course, to this little item featured by Bergdorf Goodman’s Tumblr.
I don’t even smoke and yet I stand in awe of this marvelous little hunk of machined metal. It is a thing of beauty and a joy forever and, if you Santa finds he can’t quite deliver the items on my list (Julian Assange in brown leather jeans and handcuffs) he should know that Douglas Fairbanks Jr’s lighter would be an acceptable substitute. As would Douglas Fairbanks Jr!
To be fair, the evolution of this face and body owes something to nicotine as well. But as Nan Darien said in Vanity Fair, “I don’t see the appeal of heroin. Does the weight stay off?”
This is what Courtney Love can only dream of becoming. Oh, and she does.
Fun fact: when the producer who first got Marianne under contract reported the fact to his boss, his exact words were, “I saw an angel with big tits, so I signed her.” There are worse decisions in the history of music.
Halloween’s almost here, folks, and if you’re not Lady Gaga that means it’s your one chance to bust a radical move in the costume department. May I suggest wrapping yourself in layers of irony by purchasing Bette Midler’s original costume for that beloved mermaid, Delores Del Lago, the Toast of Chicago?
Bidding is open at $500, and they estimate that it’ll close at less than $2000, which is a steal any way you look at it.
A fuchsia fish scale printed and hand painted, panne velvet mermaid costume with nude, clam shell top all heavily embellished with crystals. Together with matching feather head piece. Worn by Midler as she portrayed one of her signature characters, Delores de Lago during performances of her February 2008 through January 2010 show at the Colosseum at Caesars Palace Las Vegas, The Showgirl Must Go On.
“Gaga, here’s your chance!!” – Bette
If you’re a perfectionist (Gaga, I am looking at you) you can also pick up the whole wheelchair chorus line as well as their mermaid costumes. But in order to fill out the original costume, girl, you gonna hafta eat a sammich.