Kim Kardashian Kardigan

Relax: it’s not an earthquake. It’s just the Earl of Cardigan rolling over in his grave.

Dear Santa, is it SO much to ask… (raincoaster)

Santa Andy has to put up with some mean drunks on Christmas (Ayyyy)

Julia Child, acolyte of Cthulhu??? (ManoloFood)

Ryan Gosling is into light bondage (Lolebrity)

The War on Christmas tweets (AgentBedhead)

Jennifer Aniston has the scent of desperation (AmyGrindhouse)

Hugh Jackman has cricket balls (BusyBeeBlogger)

Alanis Morissette for Ever (CeleBitchy)

Natalie Portman is packing babeh, off the market (CelebritySmack)

Is EVERYONE pregnant? Please stop her before she breeds (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Hottest accessory of 2010: Klingonhead (CityRag)

But would Lady Gaga have broken up the Beatles? (EvilBeet)

KK hits rock bottom and starts digging (FitFabCeleb)

World’s most hated couple makes honest homewreckers of one another (GabbyBabble)

Best Busts of 2010 (GirlsTalkinSmack)

Kelly Osbourne goes Full Flamewar (HaveUHeard)

Justin Bieber’s impurity ring (INeedMyFix)

To get your little gold man, get a little man of your own (Movieline)

Richard Chamberlain comes out, Perez whacks him (PerezHilton)

and all I got were slipper socks. AGAIN (PopBytes)

Lily Allen is engaged (PopSugar)

Santa brought the world some JLoHew/AlyMil action (SeriouslyOMG)

Charlie Sheen not dead (WeNewsIt)

Crystal Renn, now 50% off

via Blackbook

Yes, through the magic of Photoshop, the world’s top plus-sized model is feeling less than 100% today. About thirty pounds less.

Are you a celebrity blogger who’d rather drink than link (and wouldn’t we all?) email me at raincoaster at gmail:
I’m starting a linking service to do your work for you! And I’m working on an ad network to launch in the fall.

Mel Gibson blames the beaver (Lolebrity)
Bad morale (NSFW!) (raincoaster)
Gatsby wanted (Manolo)
Celebrity Dads: Bale vs Fiennes (TeenyManolo)
Ho’s! (ManoloFood)
Wedding wood (ManoloBrides)
Fatboy? Slim! (ManoloBig)
What’s black and white and red and green and pink and blue and… (ManoloHome)
The Anti-Gwyneth! (AgentBedhead)
Pink black and blue (AmyGrindhouse)
Least fortunate Dita von Teese thumbnail ever (BusyBeeBlogger)
Pattinson, NOBODY cares about the nipples (CeleBitchy)
Lohan SOBER! (CelebDirtyLaundry)
The vampire facelift! (CelebCosmeticSurgery)
JLoHew, GIVE ME THAT DRESS IMMEDIATELY (CelebritySmack)
Jada stepped into a goldfish (CojoStyle)
Green Lantern black and blue (DailyStab)
Pocket Aces (EvilBeet)
Pamela Anderson does not meet provincial standards (GabbyBabble)
Wounded cougar on the loose! (HaveUHeard)
Maroon 5′s misery (INeedMyFix)
Mourning the Hills (IBBB)
So what DID Courtney wear? (PopBytes)
Let us just pray they don’t become a couple (SeriouslyOMG)

Still more lifelike than Mickey Rourke.

Psst: if you’re a gossip blogger who’d rather drink than link, drop me a line; I’m offering a 3-5x a week link service.

George Lazenby vs the disabled (TrueSlant)

Gwyneth Paltrow, title queen (Lolebrity)

The true secret of contemporary fashion? (TheManolo)

No honour among food bloggers (ManoloFood)

Wicked Witch of the West Hits The Disco shoes (ManoloBig)

Open new possibilities (ManoloHome)

Celebrity Dad Faceoff: Will Arnett vs Christian Bale (TeenyManolo)

Don’t sweat it, Bride (ManoloBrides)

Meeting the terrifying Nina Simone (JessicaGotlieb)

Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and me (Jasperante)

Bruce Willis’s boozeshake brings all the rummies to the yard (BusyBeeBlogger)

Short pregnancy for Alicia Keys (CeleBitchy)

Paltrow seeks penpals! (AgentBedhead)

World 25% less Kink-y (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Ew, JLoHew! (CojoStyle)

Boxers or briefs, Orlando Bloom? (PopBytes)

Emma Watson is hardcore! (Gawker)

Jason Bateman does the walk of shame (INeedMyFix)

Dakota Fanning soon to be nude (HaveUHeard)

Mickey Rourke replaced by human! (SeriouslyOMG)

Apple Tablets Revealed! (Lolebrity)

The latest on Channing Tatum’s boyparts (AgentBedhead)

JLoHew is Bedazzled (AmyGrindhouse)

Megan Fox in her element (BusyBeeBlogger)

American Idiots (CeleBitchy)

Wyclef Jean’s Haiti video (CelebritySmack)

Marky Mark 5.0 (DailyStab)

RIP Spaghetti-O’s (DListed)

Michael C. Hall has Hodgkin’s (JustJared)

Naughty, naughty! (Movieline)

Rihanna: say W? (PopSugar)

Courtney Love has strange body growths (LitelySalted)

Publicity hound dogs dead girl (INO)

Casey Johnson and Brittany Murphy: Obit Crit in an Age of Celebrity (raincoaster)

I don’t know what happened to the ball,
but I can tell she was out to score in those shoes!

Moving on…

Another reason to hate Gwyneth Paltrow (HolyMoly)

Lady Gaga NSFAustralia (AmyGrindhouse)

Lindsay Lohan drunk-dials US (BusyBeeBlogger)

Octovision! (AgentBedhead)

Bono goes fishing (PopBytes)

Honestly, who brings their own drugs to a jail visit? (CelebritySmack)

Pink’s washboard (TheBlemish)

Jessica Simpson soon to appear at an unemployment office near you (CeleBitchy)

Nerdcore man-candy at Star Trek promo (EvilBeet)

Eminem shares the Spock luv (Jezebel)

DRod gets deep sixed (DailyStab)

Rapunzel Man (DListed)

The Beatles are back! (GabbyBabble)

Harriet Carter Wednesday (IBBB)

Sienna Miller’s chest sponsored by Burger King and Spongebob Squarepants? (INO)

Madonna adopts Italy (UKPopSugar)

Lilo unrestrained! (POTP)

Twitter owns Ashlee Simpson’s baby pix (JustJared)

Head Start for Celebrity Babies (SeriouslyOMG)

Hugh Jackman drops in (ASL)

JLoHew’s escort faux pas (TENGossip)

Disturbed by ageing? Ernest Borgnine says just beat it! (CandyKirby)

A star is born: Failure Model Chick gets her big break (IBBB)

Jackson Browne lays the beatdown on thiefy John McCain (CelebuWreck)

Brad Pitt wardrobe malfunction (OhNoTheyDidnt)

Billy Zane gets genital exfoliation from once and future ex (AgentBedhead)

Dave Coulier aught to know what it’s like to break up with Alanis Morrisette (CelebritySmack)

Renee Zellweger chilled in Miami (DailyStab)

Leave Grandpa Alone! Hugh Hefner retires (CeleBitchy)

Katie Holmes will bring the Eighties back no matter what it takes (DListed)

JLoHew, now 10% off! (Defamer)

The history of Xenu, by L.Ron Hubbard (Gawker)

The Saga of a Celebrity Saloniste (ImNotObsessed)

Learn to speak Romulan! (EvilBeet)

Robert Downey Jr. rocks the Ron Jeremy look (GoFugYourself)

Margaret Cho gets ink (JustJared)

And Adam Sandler knows Tom Cruise…or at least is willing to blurb on his behalf (EvilBeet)

The Tom Cruise Scientology video you haven’t seen! (YouTube)(for now!)

Quiz: Who’s your TV boyfriend? (CelluloidBlonde)

Attention bloggers: Adopt A Writer! (AdoptAWriter)

Brit-onomics: how Britney Spears feeds multitudes (Defamer)

How not to be Heath Ledger (Gawker)

Britney is sick “in a good way,” feeling philosophical (TMZ)

Rambo vs the Governator (AgentBedhead)

Kate Moss looks like her mother (DailyStab)

George Clooney goes after Britney with a baseball bat (AllieIsWired)

Ashley Olsen always looks like you’re about to hit her with a stick (ImNotObsessed)

The Hannah Montana terrorist has been arrested (TrashyCeleb)

Jennifer Love Hewitt tells you 10 things you don’t know about women (POTP)

Dolly Parton’s plastic surgery roundup (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

Stephen Colbert gets the Mount Rushmore treatment (CelebritySmack)

Anderson Cooper puts his foot down on the Heath Ledger mania (HolyCandy)

Was Katie Holmes pregnant before meeting Tom Cruise? (CrazyDaysAndNights)

Britney gave Drew Barrymore a run for her money (NinjaDude)

McDreamy in uniform, sigh… (PerezHilton)

Pamela Anderson is a vegetarian dish past its freshness date (Copyranter)

Jessica Alba no longer ovulating (HolyCandy)

Olsen Twins not trolls: Olsen Twins elves instead! (GalleryOfTheAbsurd)

Janice Dickinson has a dating time warp (CelebritySmack)

Victoria Beckham has aquarium-ectomy (BricksAndStones)

Clone a Beatle for $48,000 (GoneHollywood)

Johnny Depp in the role of a lifetime! (DailyStab)

Naomi Campbell in cellphone freakout #eleventy-billion (Gabsmash)

Madonna finds yoga just not relaxing enough. May we suggest an enema? (Mollygood)

Kylie Minogue’s dominatrix gear at the Nobel Peace Prize dinner (Websters)

Ike Turner is dead: party at Tina’s! (PerezHilton)

Zac Efron cranks his Soulja Boy (JustJared)

Vince Vaughn: please don’t drink and dress (TheMeatScale)

Eva Longoria doesn’t do kinky (WOWReport)

Britney’s mystery illness? An allergy to press. Oh, go ahead, pull the other one (EvilBeet)

Top Celebrity Meltdowns of 2007 (ImNotObsessed)

Jennifer Love Hewitt may not have a big butt, but she’s got a big rock (DanasDirt)

Bryan Adams serenades PeeWee Herman with that good, old-fashioned Canadian Christmas Reggae (HolyMoly)

Most Overpaid Celebrities of 2007 (Defamer)