Whoa, they aren’t messing around anymore! I’d like to know who down at Headquarters okayed that hiring decision.

Are you a celebrity blogger who’d rather drink than link (and wouldn’t we all?) email me at raincoaster at gmail:
I’m starting a linking service to do your work for you! And I’m working on an ad network to launch in the fall.

What Would Neil Patrick Harris Do? (Lolebrity)
World’s cutest octopus (raincoaster)
These boots were made for stalking (Shoeblogs)
Why dress well? (ManoloBig)
This is a pervy poultry fancier’s dream come true (TeenyManolo)
Stacked! (ManoloHome)
New Dork Times (ManoloBrides)
Bill Murray previews Amy Winehouse’s retirement plan (AgentBedhead)
Lindsay Lohan’s lesbian prison chixploitation script writes itself (BestWeekEver)
Jennifer Aniston raises a stink in London (BricksAndStones)
I’d do that all the time if I were a Lohan (BusyBeeBlogger)
Whoopi brought her friend Harvey on the View (CeleBitchy)
A heaping hunk of himbos (CelebDirtyLaundry)
Ben Affleck’s Batcave (CelebrityMound)
Katy Perry gives a generation of fanboys diabetes (CelebritySmack)
Foxy Brown performs her version of “New Moon” (Crunk+Disorderly)
I could make a tart joke but I’ll just say “bun in the oven” (DailyStab)
Twit o’ the Day: LindsayInJail (Twitter)
Is this the long-awaited Hilton sister porno? (DanasDirt)
Some people will do ANYTHING to be like their favorite star (EvilBeet)
Forget Zardoz: Hail ZDROK! (FourFour)
Beauty and the Geeks (GabbyBabble)
STOP! In the name of fug! (GoFugYourself)
Kim Kardashian ->Victoria Beckham? (HollywoodBackwash)
Hey LOTR nerds! It’s BloomsDay! (HollywoodRag)
The Big Babeh Bummer (INeedMyFix)
Leo lays it out (HaveUHeard)
The strangest strap-on I have ever seen (IBBB)
16-year-old learns to dress herself (JustJared)
Situation Normal…rest of them AFU (MaterialBitch)
Britney Spears is team LAY OFF ME (PerezHilton)
Natalie Portman’s swan song (PinkIsTheNewBlog)
Katie Price is so not G-A-Y (UKPopSugar)
We’ve lost her (PopBytes)
V for…vajayjay? (SeriouslyOMG)

Related articles by Zemanta

• Why Is Lindsay F – ed Up? Michael Lohan charged with harassment for alleged attack on own fiancee (chicagoraysrants.com)
• Lindsay Lohan…Tweeting from Jail? (thegloss.com)

Wow. Real life wins, for once.

[If you're a gossip blogger who'd rather be drinking than linking, drop me an email at raincoaster at gmail dot com. I'm offering an affordable new link outsourcing service.]

Elizabeth Taylor vs Plastic Grrl! (TrueSlant)

Gaga, Grounded (Lolebrity)

Zee Frenssssh! (TheManolo)

This has GOT to be some horrible Freudian metaphor (ManoloHome)

Terror in the Kitchen! (ManoloFood)

About that bottle of Scotch… (ManoloBig)

Buddy got back (problems)? (ManoloMen)

Hit the Target! (TeenyManolo)

Hamlet would not have married her (ManoloBrides)

Jonah, Hexed (AgentBedhead)

Robert Pattinson CARES about us! (AmyGrindhouse)

Amy Winehouse, drama queen? (BricksAndStones)

Clive Owen smells (BusyBeeBlogger)

OK! is a comedy magazine? (CeleBitchy)

The Bride of Wildenstein (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

We have a Gaga DOWN! Repeat: we have a Gaga DOWN! (CelebDirtyLaundry)

ONE LiLo is quite sufficient, thank you (CelebritySmack)

A dandy reason to hang out in cafes (OhTheScandal)

Suri’s tribal tattoos (CityRag)

Not all royals have British Teeth (CojoStyle)

Jimmy Buffet is pro-Margarita, anti-Oilspill (DailyStab)

Five bucks on Sarah Jessica Parker’s twins (DListed)

Daniel Radcliffe does not fancy the Bieber (EvilBeet)

You do NOT go up against Oprah, my friend. (GabbyBabble)

Maybe she could just use the eyeshadow on her legs? (GoFugYourself)

I suspect Gaga (HaveUHeard)

Prince Albert locked down (INeedMyFix)

I’m ok, Britney’s a nutbar? (PoorBritney)

The Hills are alive with the sound of recaps (IBBB)

Ke$ha <3 Star Trek (JustJared)

10 greatest Real Worlders (MovieLine)

George Michael goes Down Under to come out on top (PerezHilton)

RPatz seen with Banksy ex (UKPopSugar)

I think Madame Tussaud’s just “repurposed” the Delta Burke statue (PopBytes)

The man dates Katy Perry: he’s never SEEN those before (SeriouslyOMG)

Olympic Medalist Moguliste Hannah Kearney of the US isn’t sure which to admire more: her gold medal or the sweet bouquet of BC Bud with which she was presented.

This is what she sees later that night (Lolebrity)

Stephen Baldwin does NOT fancy vampires (AgentBedhead)

Brittany Murphy’s shaky Foundation (AmyGrindhouse)

Tila Tequila falls on butt, suffers brain injury (AllieIsWired)

Bono has come back to me (BusyBeeBlogger)

Stephen Colbert brings it: 1812, The Rematch! (CeleBitchy)

Kiefer is down for the count! (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Jennifer Garner goes Elektra on VDay (PopEater)

Kevin Smith, mad Twitterbomber (CelebritySmack)

Hate NBC? Love families? Make them pay! (CelebrityVIPLounge)

Hugo Boss shops Canadian (DailyStab)

Joe Biden, you’re no Dick Cheney (Gawker)

Robert Pattinson is open to homoeopathy (DListed)

Britney’s special Valentine (EvilBeet)

The Olympic Schedule (HaveUHeard)

A year in the life of LiLo (IBBB)

Kelly Osbourne is still alive (INeedMyFix)

Perez and John Mayer sittin’ in a tree… (LitelySalted)

Pups & Order (NastyNets)

Make your own star baby (TenGossip)

Nekkid Brit: keeper or throw back? (UKPopSugar)

But are we, in fact, the world? (PopBytes)

Movie mulligans (Movieline)

At last we learn the backstory to the shot herd ’round the world. Oh Snoop, we’ve all been there.

Claire Danes knows how to work a trenchcoat (Lolebrity)

Celebrities! They’re not like us! They can walk in these shoes! (CelebToast)

The best 404 message online (AgentBedhead)

Om Nom Nom WHA???? (AllieIsWired)

Brittany Murphy, Casey Johnson, Basic Health Rules laid to rest (AmyGrindhouse)

Demon in sheep’s clothing (BWE)

Anne Hathaway flips the bird (BricksAndStones)

Alexis for Alexis! (BusyBeeBlogger)

Ooh La Little Girl Lingerie? (LaughingStork)

Kate, I think you dropped something (HolyMoly)

Sandra Bullock will cut a bitch (LitelySalted)

Forget Mischa Barton, try Carole Channing! (LaineyGossip)

Kristen Stewart in court for prostitution (TMZ)

Ralph Lauren snubs in public! (CelebrityMound)

Ellen for President? (CelebrityDirtyLaundry)

Tom Brady’s 2-month-old can run??? (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Oooh, ACDC MUST DIE!!!! (CeleBitchy)

Jay-Qui? (CelebrityVIPLounge)

Possibly the most terrifying headline I’ve ever read (CelebritySmack)

Kanye survives horrifying ordeal (CelebSlam)

Bublé‘s bongo bowl (CityRag)

Dennis Quaid’s farmer’s tan (CrazyDaysAndNights)

The Real BabyMamas of Atlanta (Crunk+Disorderly)

Brangelina lives! (DailyStab)

Paris has gone to the dogs (DanasDirt)

Nicknames of the literati (Gawker)

The return of PuppyBowl (DListed)

Betty White is terrifying (EvilBeet)

Small Wonder it was cancelled (FourFour)

Janet Jackson is a Janet Jackson impersonator (GabbyBabble)

Best Dressed/Worst Dressed at the Grammys (GoFugYourself)

Snooki’s makeover (ImBringingBloggingBack)

Qween no longer on Scene (INeedMyFix)

How Hugh Jackman rolls (HaveUHeard)

World’s most expensive benchwarmers (HollywoodBackwash)

Flack pointedly does NOT deny Paris Hilton is dumb (HollywoodRag)

Sniff Beyonce for $50 (HollywoodTuna)

KFat achieves self-awareness (ImNotObsessed)

Leif Garrett busted NOT A FLASHBACK TO 1975 (Janet CharltonsHollywood)

Virgins versus Texting! (JustJared)

PETA vs Avatar (Movieline)

Jessica Biel definitely not Jewish (FitCeleb)

Frances Bean taking singing lessons (PerezHilton)

Stock Anderson Cooper Adorable Story (PinkIsTheNewBlog)

Russell Brand shoots, scores (UKPopSugar)

Jamaican Bobsled Team not so cool (WizBangPop)

Orlando Bloom is all wet (PopBytes)

Kelly Clarkson in flamewar (RadarOnline)

Re-Enchanted (SeriouslyOMG)

Tila says the butler didn’t do it (ASocialiteLife)

Conan O’Brien’s Valentine to Britney (SquareEyes)

Saffy, darling, are you slumming in this movie? (TenGossip)

John Mayer needs to take off the Wayfarers (TheBosh)

Mischa Barton wins Best Supporting Hose (TheSkinny)

Ah, after all these years, what has not already been said about the protean talents of hottie and character actor Colin Farrell? Remember the time LiLo gave him her phone number in the gym? And he asked her how old she was? And she said seventeen? And he handed the card back and said call me in a year? and she did? And the rest is (medical) history?

He didn’t look like this back then:

Yes, it’s Colin “hottest fry cook in the chip wagon” Farrell, the pride of Dublin. Actually, given how drastically Lindsay’s gone downhill in the last year, he’s probably out of her league now, however much he might try to tone down teh sex-ay.

And believe me, he’s trying.

So Colin, what do you think of Bruges? (NSFW language, unless you work as a blogger, in which case at least be sure the people in the cafe can’t hear this)

Sure, blondes have more fun, but does she LOOK like a girl who likes to have fun? (AgentBedhead)

There IS justice in the world (AmyGrindhouse)

Kendra Wilkinson a FAR better actress than anyone suspected (BusyBeeBlogger)

If nomenclature and PR couldn’t keep these guys together, what hope IS there? (CelebritySmack)

Topless hunks in headless story (PopSugar)

Vampires: they’re JUST like us! (Lainey)

Van spawns MINI-Van (DListed)

Buh-BYE, Ty-Ty! (DailyStab)

PETA’s pet peeves (CeleBitchy)

MUST-see tv (Gawker)

Brit is BROWN! (EvilBeet)

Lindsay’s found her CALLING (HolyCandy)

Rapist sues over label; still fine with DOUCHE tho (LitelySalted)

Homeless couple spotted with ADORABLE children (GabbyBabble)

MALFOY in MIAMI! (INO)

Charlie Sheen’s Christmas CARDED (JustJared)

The AVATAR Holiday Special! (Movieline)

Mariah CARRY! (SeriouslyOMG)

Beckham’s BACK! (PopBytes)

It’s true what Glinda says: so purty you almost forget he’s a bit of a douchenozzle.

Rob Zombie’s Where the Wild Things Are (AgentBedhead)

Corey Feldman’s back on the market, ladies! (AmyGrindhouse)

James Franco must not be a REAL Italian (BusyBeeBlogger)

Back to the Eurasian Orphan Emporium for Tomkat (CeleBitchy)

World’s worst toupee? (CelebritySmack)

Gordon Ramsay experiences pain, a generation of sous chefs yell, “TELL me about it!” (DailyStab)

Gore Vidal destroys a potentially lucrative career as a childcare professional (Gawker)

Pete Wentz is a marked man (EvilBeet)

Jimmy Kimmel, claws out (GabbyBabble)

Rosielina? J’Odonnell? (INO)

Twihards about to blow their stack if RPattz is a free agent (UKPopSugar)

Hamthrax in Hollywood (Movieline)

Craig Ferguson joins the Navy (SeriouslyOMG)

But IS this, in fact, IT? (ASL)

In the spirit of Celebrity Dad Faceoff and The Monday Hotness, and with an acknowledging fist-bump to the literary meme going around the Manolosphere, we present Hump Day Links. Uh, no reason I chose that title.

And for, uh, no particular reason other than – ah – my proper esteem for public intellectuals, today I present:

The Men of Vanity Fair

Michael Lewis

William Langewiesche

Sebastian Junger

Uhhh, what was I saying? Right, public intellectuals and literacy and all like that there. Yeah, Dorothy Parker is my homegirl.

I don’t know about you, but I could use a refreshing Cold Shower after that! Now, to the hunk hump links!

Cool nekkid vamps (AgentBedhead)

Guess the hottie (AmyGrindhouse)

Soon to be the biggest-selling gift item ever (BricksAndStones)

Dexter, killer dad (BusyBeeBlogger)

Tots for t*ts (LaughingStork)

RPattz just needs the love of a good six-pack (CeleBitchy)

Clooney, Crawford, and choppers (AccidentalSexiness)

Tom Brady’s sports sisters (CelebritySmack)

Gerard Butler forecasts hot and humid! (TenGossip)

Simon Cowell takes another victim (DailyStab)

Sherlocked Up Holmes (Gawker)

Peter Andre loses 140lbs (GabbyBabble)

Douglas Family Values (EvilBeet)

Gerard Butler has something to tell you (DListed)

Justin Timberlake hits the Open Road (INO)

Leo, topless (JustJared)

The man who invented Himbos (Movieline)

Heath Ledger’s King Rat (UKPopSugar)

Jack Nicholson, party animal (SeriouslyOMG)

It’s a MAN, BABY! (HolyMoly)

Ryan Reynolds, topless (Websters)

Oh, and uh, Graydon Carter, of course:

B-Ball A-listers (AgentBedhead)

Brad Pitt hot coffee vid (AmyGrindhouse)

AlpacaAlpacaAlpacaAlpaca not as much fun as a llama (BWE)

John Mayer has found true love (CandyKirby)

Britney’s Circus comes to town (CelebritySmack)

Gladiator aprons are the new black (CelebuWreck)

Feel Kanye’s pain (DailyStab)

Octomom poses for a portrait (POTO)

Vanilla Ice finally mans up (EvilBeet)

Hell hath no fury like a baseball player scorned (GabbyBabble)

Someone should tell Jennifer Aniston about SmartCuts (HollywoodBackwash)

Katie Holmes is pure, detoxed, exhausted (HollywoodRag)

Mario Lopez has yet to meet Miss Right (Websters)

It’s not the size of your caulk, it’s how you use it (IBBB)

It’s now officially okay to laugh at Sherri Shepard (ImNotObsessed)

The Young Victoria premiere in London (UKPopSugar)

The Return of Super Dave! (SeriouslyOMG)

This will not end well (HolyMoly)