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Lindsay Lohan | Ayyyy! - Part 4
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Hump Day Links: Trent Reznor Edition

Trent Reznor of Nine Inch Nails performing on the 1999 MTV Music Video Awards at the Metropolitan Opera House, Lincoln Center in New York City on September 9, 1999. (Photo by Frank Micelotta/ImageDirect)

I don’t honestly think we’ve had Trent before, so here is the lovely Nine Inch Nails founder in all his post-heroinal, pre-steroidal glory from a few years back. He’s so thick and beefy lately that he’s got double chins behind his ears. Not. A. Good. Look.

Instead of toasting this with the obvious choice of a protein shake, I suggest a nice goblet of Mansinthe: sure, Absinthe tastes appalling, but it sets the goth/emo tone and whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, right? Aw, shaddap and write a poem about the taste of wormwood, whydoncha?

Chairdancing With The Hotties (raincoaster)
Bobby Trendy, Big Mouth (Ayyyy)
Johnny Depp-O-Rama (Lolebrity)
Lindsay Lohan’s badass, coke-seeing escape attempt (CelebrityBeehive)
Heather Graham has swimmer’s ear (AgentBedhead)
David Arquette mistakes Howard Stern for Oprah Winfrey (AmyGrindhouse)
Caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!!!! (BusyBeeBlogger)
Suddenly, there’s not a dry seat in the house! (CeleBitchy)
The end days are upon us: even men hate Jennifer Aniston now (CelebDirtyLaundry)
Bad Panda! (DListed)
That’s a whole LOTTA tablecloth, Keira (GoFugYourself)
Taylor Swift is still an angsty teen (HaveUHeard)
Raisin on board! (INeedMyFix)
Perez Hilton, nice guy? (PerezHilton)
Does Britney Spears have a crush on George Stephanopoulos (PoorBritney)
Michael J. Fox goes back to Back to the Future! (SeriouslyOMG)
Adam Sandler makes a lousy lesbian (ASL)

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Top That!

Want:

Marie Antoinette Hoodie. Decapitate! It's great!

The Marie Antoinette Hoodie. Decapitate! It's great!

I NEED this in time for Bastille Day! Let’s toast to this excellent Threadless design with a glass of fine Armagnac diluted with just a splash of the late queen’s favorite tipple, Evian water. I can’t drink Evian straight; as Janis Joplin said, No water in my whiskey, man. It hurts my throat.

And now, your Friday gossip link roundup:

Happy Canadian Thanksgiving! (raincoaster)
Friday Caption Contest: Shadow of a Superstar (Ayyyy)
Katherine Heigl gets the new Colonic Facial (CelebrityBeehive)
Herman. Pee-Wee Herman. (Lolebrity)
Fresh, free-range Hamm (Gawker)
War Dog of the Week (Warning: sappy) (ForeignPolicy)
That’s no lady! (AgentBedhead)
Two minutes and thirty-nine seconds with James Franco (AmyGrindhouse)
Dolph Lundgren is just asking for it (BusyBeeBlogger)
Dora the Explorer on the rocks (CeleBitchy)
Lindsay Lohan is not such a twit anymore (CelebDirtyLaundry)
Kim Kardashian’s snack tray holds a drink (CelebritySmack)
Britney weaned the kids off Cosmos (CityRag)
Cojo vs Ronald McDonald (CojoStyle)
Amy Winehouse crashes a lap (CrazyDaysAndNights)
Wino has “something” up her nose (INeedMyFix)
I SAID, Pull up yo damn pants! (Crunk&Disorderly)
Awww, I bet on Aeschylus (DailyStab)
Sienna Miller loves dressing up in Grandma’s outfits (DListed)
Is Renee Zellweger Bridget Jones or Jennifer Aniston? (EvilBeet)
Gooooood morning, Republicans! (HaveUHeard)
Snooki is a lobster racist! (IBBB)
80’s cartoon trivia quiz (LitelySalted)
Grover stars in new Old Spice campaign (MovieLine)
Amy Winehouse’s Taxi Driver (PerezHilton)
Weird celebrity fetish news (SeriouslyOMG)
Creepy celebrity dolls (ASL)

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Hump Day Links: Reheated Hamm Edition

I know, I know, we just had him, but for some reason I just feel like featuring him again today. The only problem is, I can’t decide which picture to use.

Do you like this one?

Mad Men actor Jon Hamm arrived at an office building in West Hollywood, California on September 27, 2010 to take care of some business. Jon was dressed very casual, could this be the studio of a new project?  Fame Pictures, Inc

or this one?

Jon Hamm got back. He should get back to my apartment as quickly as possible

Let’s drink to that with a nice, refreshing Screwdriver, from the official index to Mad Men Cocktails.

Mean Disney Girls just a bunch of drama queens (raincoaster)
At least they were free of Yoko in there (Lolebrity)
Reznorvision coming soon to your screens? (AgentBedhead)
The Face of Kotex! (BusyBeeBlogger)
Some people will do ANYTHING to impress Sandra Bullock’s castoffs (CeleBitchy)
Spot the cyborgs among us! (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)
Violent repeat felon seeks custodianship of Lindsay Lohan (CelebDirtyLaundry)
Michael Bolton, it is FAR too late for respect! (CelebritySmack)
Gaga a Go-Go (CityRag)
Naomi Campbell’s feet are HUGE (CojoStyle)
Yes, everyone but me DOES have a book deal (DailyStab)
Macaroni Rascals (DListed)
A foursome isn’t just for golfing and bridge? (EvilBeet)
Sly, stylin’ (GabbyBabble)
Brigitte Nielson is looking younger (GoFugYourself)
Get your Bieber Babies! (HaveUHeard)
Michael Bolton is the Rodney Dangerfield of show pony has-beens (INeedMyFix)
Catching up with Bristol Palin’s favorite show (IBBB)
Oh holy Jeebus, even Hilary Duff has a book deal (JustJared)
This will be some actress’s lowest career point (MovieLine)
Baby Buble (PerezHilton)
B from the block (PinkIsTheNewBlog)
Backney! (PoorBritney)
The Mysteries of Minnelli (PopBytes)
Jon’s got a Ham in his pants (SeriouslyOMG)

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Robert Downey Breakfast Links

Actor Robert Downey Jr. leaves Nobu Restaurant on July 30, 2010 in Malibu, CA (Photo by AJ Franklin / Meet The Famous) Photo via Newscom


If it were literally anyone else on Earth, I’d say this was just too Bing Crosby, but Downey is edgy enough to keep it from being boring. I like to think he’s the reformed bad boy who’s clean and sober, but still a little crazy. Now, if those jeans had been skinny hipster jeans, or the hat a titch smaller, I’d have said (rightly) throw that sad fashion victim under a bus for the good of humanity, but my boy is too smart to be a sucker to somebody else’s trend, thank GOD.

So let’s raise a cup of Irish Breakfast Tea to a clean and sober and still kooky Robert Downey Junior.

Britney Spears, like you’ve never heard her before (raincoaster)
The Ages of Lindsay Lohan (Lolebrity)
Bai is Back! (AgentBedhead)
James Franco denies he has class (AmyGrindhouse)
Kristin Davis is holey (BusyBeeBlogger)
And ours, too, Taylor (CeleBitchy)
Mariah Carey falls hard…for backup dancer? (CelebDirtyLaundry)
Look what ol’ ceiling eyes landed (CelebritySmack)
Lindsay Lohan’s high school yearbook photos? (CityRag)
Elmo’s playmate on SNL (DailyStab)
Charo and…Iggy Pop??? (DListed)
Fergie rocks the Merv Griffin caftan (EvilBeet)
Nicole Richie has her Tinkerbell costume all ready for Halloween (GabbyBabble)
They’re even recycling bachelors now (HaveUHeard)
I think that’s Ann-Margret’s body, Bret (INeedMyFix)
NOBODY remakes The Duke (MovieLine)
Sex and the Single Hobbit (PerezHilton)
Daniel Radcliffe is retro-fabulous (PinkIsTheNewBlog)
KFat takes the munchkins to mingle with proles (PoorBritney)
Brad and Zahara ditch the old ball and chain (UKPopSugar)
This divorce WILL cost a pound of flesh (SeriouslyOMG)

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Dirty Martini Links

CANNES, FRANCE - MAY 23: Actress Linda Marraccini (Dirty Martini) attends the Palme d'Or Award Closing Ceremony held at the Palais des Festivals during the 63rd Annual Cannes Film Festival on May 23, 2010 in Cannes, France. (Photo by Sean Gallup/Getty Images)

Sari about that: renowned ecdysiast Dirty Martini models perhaps the only example of a bondage sari in existence.

Here are your Dirty Martini emo links. Why am I so emo today? Read the last post and then mix a pitcher of Black Widows for yourself and me.

Underemployed Jedi single dad starts drinking early (Lolebrity)
Brian Atene is at the Nembutal and self-doubt again (raincoaster)
Brian Atene invented Superman Vodka, he’ll have you know (raincoaster media)
Here are two decorative, talented men as a sort of unicorn chaser (TeenyManolo)
This mystery man is filthy (ManoloMen)
Blohan blew it (AgentBedhead)
More Don Draper! (BusyBeeBlogger)
Paris Hilton says “Marriott? I wish I’d thought of buying it! I love Pocahontas!” (CeleBitchy)
As if the world didn’t have enough stupid things that make you want to die in it (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)
Hey Gaga, Scotch is fattening! (CelebDirtyLaundry)
Well, alcohol IS a preservative (CelebritySmack)
Dita, NEVER get between me and the Cointreau (CojoStyle)
My god, what were they ON when they greenlighted this? (DailyStab)
THIS man is intoxicating! (DListed)
This is the only man perhaps more perfect than Jon Hamm (EvilBeet)
Hallelujah and pass the Jesus Juice! (GabbyBabble)
I thought what happened in Vegas stayed there? Is that too much to ask? (HaveUHeard)
Where was SuperHamm when THIS happened? (INeedMyFix)
What’s wrong with Drink, Bitch, Sulk? (JustJared)
Can even Jodie Foster’s might save Mel? (PerezHilton)
If Pink is a drunk I love her even more (PoorBritney)

and now, your cheer-em-up unicorn chaser featuring OK Go and Puppehs!

Tim Gunns them down

NEW YORK - SEPTEMBER 10: A model walks the runway at the Guli Collections Spring 2011 fashion show during Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week at The Studio at Lincoln Center on September 10, 2010 in New York City. (Photo by Jemal Countess/Getty Images for Guli Collections )

Quote of the day: Jackie O would not have camel toe.
Tim Gunn

Apparently, looking like a hermaphroditic Moroccan bellhop is going to be big in 2011. And camel toe.

Everybody looks fab in go-go boots (Lolebrity)
Bill Gates’ Manhunt profile (raincoaster)
Tony Blair’s criminal mind (TheShebeenClub)
Ben Afflecks’ red carpet reign of terror (AgentBedhead)
Miley Cyrus’s grunge stripper look (AmyGrindhouse)
Caption Hamfleck! (BusyBeeBlogger)
Brad no longer Pitted? (CelebCosmeticSurgery)
Lou Reed snubs Susan Boyle (CelebDirtyLaundry)
Dream couple to reunite? (CeleBitchy)
Julia Roberts graded C (CelebritySmack)
Celebrity mug shots (CityRag)
Diane Krueger wins another fashion award (CojoStyle)
Tom Brady’s crackup (DailyStab)
Everybody loves a man in uniform! (DListed)
Look who has a record deal and you don’t (GabbyBabble)
Who wants to see Goopy yodel for two hours? (HaveUHeard)
Karl is laughing at Diane too (INeedMyFix)
Jon Hamm discussing porn and … you’re not still reading this are you? (JustJared)
Tacky press release of the day (MovieLine)
Megan Fox takes over Ben Affleck’s role in Dogma (PerezHilton)
Britney’s bodyguards bio’d (PoorBritney)
PUT THE MAKEUP BACK ON!!! (SeriouslyOMG)

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Butt Kim!

Kim Kardashian proved she is a fan friendly celeb as she chatted with an admirer while grabbing a few coffees before doing some shopping in Beverly Hills, CA on August 18, 2010. Fame Pictures, Inc


I don’t care if it made you famous, pick that up and put it back where it belongs. And put on some damn pants while you’re at it; I’m sure there’s an industrial-gauge denim manufacturer who can carve you a pair of supportive jeans.

Paris Hilton’s smug mug (Lolebrity)
Feel! My! Pain! (raincoaster)
Celebrity Dad Faceoff: Kiefer vs Idris (TeenyManolo)
What disheveled, used-up Hell is this? (AgentBedhead)
LiLo guilty of crimes against fashion! (BusyBeeBlogger)
Was that “gum” or “dumb,” Paris? (CeleBitchy)
Sentences I never thought I would write: Kelly Osbourne looks fabulous (CelebFashionWatcher)
Back to the SuperSquats, honey (CelebDirtyLaundry)
For THIS a Muppet had to die? (CelebritySmack)
All-Time Emmy Dresstastrophies (CojoStyle)
Their drug use nose no bounds (CityRag)
Cougar Power! (DailyStab)
Breakup breakdowns? (LaineyGossip)
Rita Wilson’s shoes match that dress in Gone with the Wind…you know the one (DListed)
Anna Paquin wore Elvish armour to the Emmys (MoeJackson)
That’s just how she rolls (EvilBeet)
Dancing with the … these people??? (GabbyBabble)
Sexy Spies! (HaveUHeard)
I swear to god this is the gayest thing I have ever seen (INeedMyFix)
Michael Jackson is the king of iTunes? (PerezHilton)
Courtney Cox has gotten HUGE! (SeriouslyOMG)
Welcome to America, Mister Beckham (ASL)

Hump Day Hunk Links: Prince Andrew Edition

circa 1981:  Andrew, Duke of York standing by a Royal Air Force helicopter.  (Photo by Keystone/Getty Images)

Yes, Prince Andrew, Duke of York, ex-husband of Fergie, the former Randy Andy, uncle of the two reigning Royal Hunks. These two shots are living proof that the minute they discover golf they begin to go to seed. (side note: feathers are totally in this year)

ROTORUA, NEW ZEALAND - MARCH 17:  Prince Andrew, Duke of York makes a speech as he attends a ceremony to honour the gallantry of Lance Sergeant Haane Manahi, at Te Papiouru Marae, Ohinemutu on the third day of his seven day visit to New Zealand, on March 17, 2007 in Rotorua, New Zealand. Manahi was not awarded a Victoria Cross for his actions at Takrouna Ridge in North Africa in 1943 during World War II, despite recommendations that his gallantry warranted the highest award for valour. This year, the government, working with Te Arawa, the Manahi VC Committee, and Buckingham Palace, announced that it would hold a special ceremony to recognise Lance Sergeant Manahi?s deeds, and The Queen expressed her admiration for his bravery The presence of the Duke at the ceremony reflects her wish to be personally associated with the initiatives to recognise his gallantry.  (Photo by Phil Walter/Getty Images)

James Dean has a surprise for Roddy McDowell (Lolebrity)

Barack Obama’s terrorist connections! (raincoaster)

This is beyond(ce) good taste (AgentBedhead)

KFat is back (AmyGrindhouse)

Lindsay Lohan’s got a face for radio (BusyBeeBlogger)

Elizabeth Hurley is full of … hot water? (CeleBitchy)

Happy Birthday, Ginger Nice (CelebrityFashionWatcher)

Mariah is mum (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Best Lilo pun of the week (CityRag)

Bonono (CojoStyle)

Courtney Loves looking smart (GoFugYourself)

also loves her talcum powder! (PerezHilton)

Betty White kicking ass and taking names (HaveUHeard)

Gerard Butler’s bust (INeedMyFix)

Urine time! (IBBB)

Ronaldo is dating Damien from The Omen? (JustJared)

Daniel Radcliffe’s Out Outtakes (PinkIsTheNewBlog)

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