Ayyyy! » Liz Hurley

How’s it going, Kristen Stewart?

raincoaster — Tue, 07 Jun 2011 06:52:13 +0000

It's one step away from finger guns

Holding it together, I see.

Kristen, sweetheart. I knew Liz Hurley. Liz Hurley once snubbed a friend of mine. You, my dear, are no Liz Hurley.

Liz doesn't actually care if it all falls apart, as indeed it did a few years later

Actually, I don’t hate the dress. I don’t see the point of it, but I don’t hate it. It looks like a twenty-thousand dollar cross between a punk rock leather jacket and a Christian Louboutin spike shoe. That said, something has obviously fundamentally changed in the celeb-o-sphere: She’s showing evidence of some emotion other than “mopey” and that’s got to be either a good thing or a sign the Rapture is indeed approaching. So what the heck, here’s to that with a Happy Face cocktail and some gossip links:

Batman shows off his Buggysnake, his birds, and his Bat Moves in Badass Brazilian Bat Dance Action! (raincoaster)

Name That Sock! Holey celebrity footwear, Batman, whoever that is should be arrested! (Ayyyy)

Blogger pimps out own social media workshops in shocking gossip link roundup non sequitur! (raincoastermedia)

Axl Rose, living avatar of Don’t Dad, thunders towards the stage edge, and a hundred fans leap backwards rather than be crushed beneath him like so many twiglets under an orca. (Lolebrity)

Game of Thrones recap: all the news you ever wanted on the best series you’re probably not watching. (Crasstalk)

Cambridge Scholar? You might be good enough to sign on as a servant at Casa Goopy. Yes, it’ll be torture working for her, but think of the book deal! (AgentBedhead)

It’s a man, baby! Blind item not quite as blind as this retro leading man might wish. (BusyBeeBlogger)

NOBODY ignores Anna Wintour and lives. Sienna Miller had better start saying her prayers (and also laying off the facial fillers). (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Did Jessica Biel get her pity fuck after all? Gerard Butler says…she’ll take what she can get; wouldn’t you? (CelebritySmack)

Strangely, I don’t recall the nude scene in Shakespeare. That’s not going to stop this underage starlet, though! (CelebVIPLounge)

Lauryn Hill is a Duggar at heart! She’s Sexto-Mom! (DailyStab)

Whiner Weiner’s weiner winner! Hey, there’s a reason they call it “congress”! (EarSucker)

I’m not sure if that’s a wardrobe malfunction or the best idea EVER! Justin Timberlake can lift and separate me any time! (FitFabCeleb)

Dear ScarJo: ProTip: this is not how you protect your privacy. You’re welcome. (GirlsTalkinSmack)

Jennifer Aniston would really, really like you to believe her this time, and so would both their publicists. (HaveUHeard)

There will be no One Night in Jennifer Lopez tape. Not if Jennifer Lopez can help it. (HollywoodHiccups)

Photo PROOF Gerard Butler looks like the Great Gazoo! I’m not kidding, people. Cannot be unseen! (INeedMyFix)

Is this a photo of Jack Black playing with himself on the red carpet? Yes. Yes, I’m pretty sure that it is. (MathewGuiver)

Rafael Nadal shows you one reason to love white jeans. Well, technically this might be two reasons… (SwoonWorthy)

Selah.

Somehow this is Prince Harry’s fault

raincoaster — Tue, 19 Apr 2011 05:28:56 +0000

The Royal Wedding entrance like none other. My shameful past as a Prince Andrew fangirl with full-on subscriptions to Majesty AND The Royals comes out as I say the Princess Ann and Camilla lookalikes are really startlingly good, but the emo cynic within me comes out when I note that even the fake Prince Harry has way more fun than the fake Prince William, who has way more fun than either of the real ones.

Now, let’s toast these glorious ersatzii with (what else?) a Buck’s Fizz and some common gossip links.

Tee Many Martoonis (ManoloFood)

Spa No Go? Oh. (raincoaster)

Marilyn Monroe conquers the world! (Ayyyy)

Is this how the Spears family started? (Lolebrity)

Tom Cruise sees red (AgentBedhead)

And it turns out he’s not even related to Viggo! (BusyBeeBlogger)

Evan Rachel Wood lives up to his name (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Vanessa Hudgens in tampon chain fashion tragedy (CelebritySmack)

And then Trump asked for its birth certificate (CelebVIPLounge)

Joey Ramone lives on. On white trash (CityRag)

NPH has double trouble (DailyStab)

How many celebutards does it take to dance on the head of a mushroom? (DippedInCream)

Oh, Aniston, it’s SO mutual (EarSucker)

Mike Tyson is serious about this yoga thing, too (FitFabCeleb)

Elizabeth Hurley will never age. STOP IT ALREADY, BITCH! (GirlsTalkinSmack)

Let me get this straight…If you sleep under Miley Cyrus’ armpits, you will never have nightmares? (HaveUHeard)

JSimp wigs out (HollywoodHiccups)

Shack up with Glee! (INeedMyFix)

Royal Wedding rehearsal shocker! (MathewGuiver)

Nicki Minaj drops the dildo for Britney (PoorBritney)

Fergie drops the “D-List Bomb” on the TSA (PopBytes)

Huh? Seriously? Kirstie Alley was onstage at the same time? (Swoonworthy)

Miley Cyrus appears to have a shin cellulite problem??? (TheSkinny)

Fred Astaire will have none of your tawdry, drunken gossip links

raincoaster — Mon, 04 Apr 2011 06:15:55 +0000

Fred Astaire loved his shoes

Strangely for a man of his era, but not-so-strangely for a trained athlete, Fred strongly maintained that he had no favorite drink, so I suppose when we salute Fred we will have to do it with an elegant dancing slipper full of imaginary Champagne. He may not have known much about alcohol, but he obviously knew from shoes, and for that we honour him.

And then trudge right on to our tawdry, drunken gossip links. *hic*

The secret of Rebecca Black’s success (raincoaster)

Happy Birthday, Brando (ManoloFood)

Show of hands! (Ayyyy)

The Great Game? (Lolebrity)

in the same way diarrhea is explosive (AgentBedhead)

Mae West could tame anything (BusyBeeBlogger)

Celebrity Apprentice roundup (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Elizabeth Hurley is back, bitches! (CelebritySmack)

The Ambiguously Gay Duo IRL (CelebVIPLounge)

Maybe we should drop HIM on Benghazi? (DailyStab)

But you couldn’t pay her to listen (EarSucker)

Billy Ray bought the first one! (FitFabCeleb)

OMG it’s like stretch pants got marked down at Walmart! (GirlsTalkinSmack)

Heidi Klum slimed! (HaveUHeard)

Crackers, Jack. (HollywoodHiccups)

Lindsay Lohan typecast (INeedMyFix)

It’s like if Mad Max Thunderdome had cheerleaders (MathewGuiver)

Just how Fatale is Britney? (PoorBritney)

He could slime me anytime (SwoonWorthy)

OMG fatty fat fatties! (TheSkinny)

Hump Day Hunk Links: Jake Gyllenhaal AGAIN

raincoaster — Thu, 11 Nov 2010 06:50:09 +0000

Jake Gyllenhaal. I was going to write a more elaborate caption, but I got distracted

Yes, yes, we’ve featured Jakey-poo time without number, but I defy you to watch this video and not give it up for him (although perhaps Anne Hathaway sort of steals it). Jake Gyllenhaal, talking about his favorite romantic love song.

Adolf Hitler, found at last? (raincoaster)

Who’s Sari now, Elizabeth Hurley? (Ayyyy)

Daniel Radcliffe is naked without it (Lolebrity)

Food porn, Yorkshire style (Manolofood)

I need this like I need another hole in the head (ManoloJewelry)

The Big O (GreenManolo)

Knit one, parle two! (CraftyManolo)

No lip from you! (ManoloBeauty)

Madonna has cooties! (AgentBedhead)

Enter the Soundgarden! (BusyBeeBlogger)

Katy Perry’s secret not so secret anymore (CelebDirtyLaundry)

The Dream Team: Cojo and Paula Abdul (CojoStyle)

Pastel on board! (DailyStab)

Get into Grace Kelly’s skirt! (GirlsTalkinSmack)

Yes, Carrie Underwood, this makes your ass look fat (HaveUHeard)

Sexiest Men Alive, or: Your Christmas Shopping List (INeedMyFix)

Harry Potter wears Canadian makeup (FabSugar)

Louis Vuitton is Sari

raincoaster — Thu, 11 Nov 2010 02:44:11 +0000

It doesn’t look much like a traditional sari, but this is the new Louis Vuitton ready-to-wear limited edition Sari Dress by Marc Jacobs. It’s made of vintage Sari materials, primarily silk of course, but also including gold threads. And while on the one hand, lovely fabrics, nice idea, unfortunately, none of these strapless, bubble-skirted 80′s throwbacks have anything like the authentic allure of a real sari, or even the stylishly referential nod of this dress from Ralph Lauren:

or this, from Tadashi Shoji, at Saks:

In short, while sari fabrics ARE awesome, they’re not the most awesome thing about the sari. The most awesome thing about the sari is…the sari.

However, the top is important too, Elizabeth.

Hump Day Links: the capital of Colin Farrell

raincoaster — Wed, 30 Dec 2009 15:33:04 +0000

Ah, after all these years, what has not already been said about the protean talents of hottie and character actor Colin Farrell? Remember the time LiLo gave him her phone number in the gym? And he asked her how old she was? And she said seventeen? And he handed the card back and said call me in a year? and she did? And the rest is (medical) history?

He didn’t look like this back then:

Yes, it’s Colin “hottest fry cook in the chip wagon” Farrell, the pride of Dublin. Actually, given how drastically Lindsay’s gone downhill in the last year, he’s probably out of her league now, however much he might try to tone down teh sex-ay.

And believe me, he’s trying.

So Colin, what do you think of Bruges? (NSFW language, unless you work as a blogger, in which case at least be sure the people in the cafe can’t hear this)

Sure, blondes have more fun, but does she LOOK like a girl who likes to have fun? (AgentBedhead)

There IS justice in the world (AmyGrindhouse)

Kendra Wilkinson a FAR better actress than anyone suspected (BusyBeeBlogger)

If nomenclature and PR couldn’t keep these guys together, what hope IS there? (CelebritySmack)

Topless hunks in headless story (PopSugar)

Vampires: they’re JUST like us! (Lainey)

Van spawns MINI-Van (DListed)

Buh-BYE, Ty-Ty! (DailyStab)

PETA’s pet peeves (CeleBitchy)

MUST-see tv (Gawker)

Brit is BROWN! (EvilBeet)

Lindsay’s found her CALLING (HolyCandy)

Rapist sues over label; still fine with DOUCHE tho (LitelySalted)

Homeless couple spotted with ADORABLE children (GabbyBabble)

MALFOY in MIAMI! (INO)

Charlie Sheen’s Christmas CARDED (JustJared)

The AVATAR Holiday Special! (Movieline)

Mariah CARRY! (SeriouslyOMG)

Beckham’s BACK! (PopBytes)

Reader question: Celebrating your assets

Spirit Fingers — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 15:32:24 +0000

Q: If I were to describe myself in two words, it would be “fantastic rack”. Tell me, how should I celebrate this undeniable fact?

A: I offer up two options to pay tribute to your bounteous bosom. Firstly, you can order a tasteful floral arrangement to be delivered straight to your pushed up boobs, where they will sit quite nicely and draw attention to the area in question. Alternatively, you can construct an equally tasteful shrine for these marvels – it may take a little getting used to at first, but once the worshippers start gathering to pay their respects you will surely find the effort was totally worth it.

Ayyyy! Pop quiz

Spirit Fingers — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 15:35:50 +0000

Match the pictures above to these descriptions of Gwyneth Paltrow’s sentiments:
(a) tight-lipped disapproval of collagen use and big fancy Indian weddings
(b) smug in the knowledge that straight blonde locks reminiscent of spun gold are far superior to curly brunette hair
(c) mild disgust at having to jostle for shoulder space with someone who hasn’t won an Oscar
(d) condescension towards mothers whose children aren’t that interested in fashion

And when you’ve finished with that, see if you can figure out from below who is less than thrilled to be sharing the limelight with a bunch of minor talents.

Then and now

Spirit Fingers — Thu, 01 May 2008 12:52:31 +0000

The safety pins may be have been replaced by sequins, but some things still remain the same.