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Semantic Style

 

alexa chung is in no sense turned out

alexa chung is in no sense turned out

She must be studying yoga intensely;, it’s really rare to see anyone as completely “centered” as fashion diva Alexa Chung.

On that note, let’s toast todays perfectly centered gossip links with a perfectly symmetrical Cross-Eyed Skull Cocktail.

Animal Hats of the Rich and Famous (raincoaster)

Oh! Livia! (Ayyyy)

The Things I Do for You People! (ManoloFood)

Darth Vader, social media master of disaster (Lolebrity)

Is this part of an LRon approved diet? (AgentBedhead)

One less candidate for Celebrity Rehab (BusyBeeBlogger)

Playgirl, RPattz, and you already clicked this didn’t you? (CelebDirtyLaundry)

No, Kat, “WeHo” isn’t a descriptor. (CelebritySmack)

Ben Affleck might have a career after all (CelebrityVIPLounge)

Some traumas you never overcome (CityRag)

Kelly Clarkson assumes holding pattern (DailyStab)

Playgirl wants to bag a Silver Fox (EarSucker)

Grizzlies don’t whine! (FitFabCeleb)

Does pigeontoe cause crosseye, Alexa? (GirlsTalkinSmack)

JUSTIN! NOT IN PUBLIC!!! (HaveUHeard)

Rihanna untapped! (HollywoodHiccups)

Stern ‘n Sexy in Rolling Stone (INeedMyFix)

The “ugly bridesmaid dress” effect, with cheerleaders! (MathewGuiver)

Blogger busts Brit-Brit cherry (PoorBritney)

The family that rehabs together… (PopBytes)

Ellen Pompeo’s bizarre nipple situation (TheSkinny)

Wrap it or suck it, Ryan (TheSkinnyChic)

 

 

Shoe Horns and Corn Links

Christian Louboutin has a lot to answer for (for which to answer? Whatever) in particular these heinosities for both sexes:

For Gentlemen:

This Louboutin demonstrates what men think of as "spikes"

This Louboutin demonstrates what men think of as "spikes"

And for the Ladies:

To Lady Gaga, these are just fluffy

To Lady Gaga, these are just fluffy

Now, I’m sorry.

No, I’m not.

But these BOTH look like either two people suffering from EPIC plantar warts (isn’t it nice they found each other? I bet the romcom would star Jennifer Aniston and Ben Stiller, and be nearly as painful as the disease) OR they were lovingly hand-crafted in an Italian atelier from the intimate membranes of a Stegosaurus with history’s worst case of genital warts.

Having planted that lovely thought in your head, I’ll now degrade you further with todays corny links.

Britney Spears is corny (Lolebrity)

Just say YES to creamed corn and ketchup with this delicacy (Manolofood)

“Evergreen” is still the top kernel of corn (raincoaster)

Joan Collins’ liquor is a little more rarefied (ayyyy)

Gaga’s brains are totally frittata (AgentBedhead)

Chris CORNell (BusyBeeBlogger)

Duelling cornballs, nobody wins! (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Bagel-to-Perogy communications perfected (DippedInCream)

Kingston’s just a niblet off the ol’ cob (CelebritySmack)

What the Adele? Isn’t WalMart too cornepone? (CelebVIPLounge)

Elisabetta Corn-all-ass (CityRag)

Aw, shucks, Canada’s hottest export returns! (DailyStab)

Gaga’s husky voice comes from the Whiskey Yoga Diet (GirlsTalkinSmack)

I always forget which one is Korny (FitFabCeleb)

Bieber creamed! (SeriouslyOMG)

Daniel Radcliffe is all Aw Shucks (CeleBitchy)

She’s a niblet, and shrinking! (TheSkinny)

Nice stalks! (GossipTeen)

Is that a corncob in your pocket, Brad, or??? (HaveUHeard)

Simon Cowell is picking Canada’s best crop of niblets (INeedMyFix)

If Gwyneth Paltrow is a vegan, does that make her a cannibal? (AmyGrindhouse)

Britney got her silks combed (PoorBritney)

Sui, Sui, pig, pig, pig (PopBytes)

Mariah’s ready to pop (EvilBeet)

Don’t Sweat It, Mariah: we’ve got your links!

mariah and the clodhoppers

I’m not exactly sure how to parse this platform-stiletto-and-cropped-sweats look. Perhaps Mariah’s gym is flooded?

Nuts! Sami Salo’s balls of steel hit the ice, go down (TrueSlant)

Cthulhu sex tape shocker! (raincoaster)

Karl Lagerfeld haiku for u! (Lolebrity)

Whose shoes? (TheManolo)

Nips Akimbo! (ManoloBig)

Out! Out! (ManoloHome)

Stick a fork in it! (ManoloBrides)

Demons begone! But only on weekends! (AgentBedhead)

Gisele inspires thoughts of death! (AmyGrindhouse)

Hayden Christensen back from career death (BusyBeeBlogger)

St Bono is invoked for protection against sanctimony (DippedInCream)

Vampire babies! (CeleBitchy)

The tears of a Golem! (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

Lisa Marie wants offerings to the dead! (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Death runs in the family (CelebritySmack)

Keith Richards is Benjamin Button! (HolyMoly)

Career ambitions slaughtered! (DailyStab)

Sir Ian McKellan not quite dead yet! (DListed)

Necronauts need money, too ya know! (EvilBeet)

A threat from Skeletor! (GabbyBabble)

Is Calvin Klein a soul vampire? (Gawker)

The franchise that CANNOT DIE! (HaveUHeard)

Yetis! (INeedMyFix)

Zombie Katherine Heigl? (JustJared)

Helen Mirren and Doppelganger Mirren! (LitelySalted)

Salute the dead! (MovieLine)

Kiefer is eternal! (UKPopSugar)

The tomb is open but the body is dead! (SeriouslyOMG)

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Monday Man Links

Let’s start the week right with some eye candy, shall we? Presenting Prince Hot Ginge:

Photo by: KGC107/starmaxinc.com 2010 5/7/10 Prince Harry at a presentation of Flying Badg

As Borat would say, “verrrrry niiiiiiiiice!” The great thing about uniforms is, if they look bad the entire country complains about them until they get fixed; in a way, it’s sort of crowdsourcing design. Yes, there are practical considerations to which one must Iraqiesce. Sure, it may never be as sleek as if Hedi Slimane got his hands on it, but on the plus side, most of the recruits would be able to fit into the uniforms without contracting cosmetic tuberculosis first.

Sami Salo’s Internet Celebrity Takes Balls (True/Slant)

Nicole Kidman can’t exorcise the ghost of Tom Cruise (Lolebrity)

Red Sole Diaries (TheManolo)

The Death of Cute (TheBigGirls)

Jennifer Aniston’s baby food consequences (TeenyManolo)

These crazy kids! (ManoloHome)

Happy Mother of the Bride Day (ManoloBrides)

Henry Rollins is outed! (AgentBedhead)

RIP Lena Horne (AmyGrindhouse)

Betty White OWNs Saturday Night (BusyBeeBlogger)

Heidi Klum wants into your closet! (CeleBitchy)

You’re the man now, Chaz! (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Jessica Simpson is wrapped like a Mother’s Day pressie (CelebritySmack)

World’s crispiest hair spotted in New York (DailyStab)

Old Person wins Gaga fight (Gawker)

Kristen Stewart goes through Elle (HaveUHeard)

Minnie Driver’s baby will KILL YOU (INeedMyFix)

Bristols for Babies! I mean against! Oh it’s so hard to keep track! (IBBB)

I…I don’t think I want to KNOW what a “Pob” is, let alone watch one (UKPopSugar)

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Louboutin in Louboutins

Christian Louboutin Presents His Shoe Collection - Berlin

Doesn’t shoe designer/living god Christian Louboutin look just impossibly dapper here? And, as always, his shoes are the FIERCENESS!

Christian Louboutin Presents His Shoe Collection - Berlin

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