Paris and Nicky “TwigletThighs” Hilton go shopping (I’mNotObsessed)

Brad Pitt just has a wide stance (HolyCandy)

Jessica and Ashlee Simpson and Emmy Rossum lounging chez GQ (DailyStab)

Britney has an entertaining new stalker (CelebritySmack)

Meanwhile, so do gossip blog receptionists (WOWReport)

It’s official: World’s Biggest Gold-Digger (GabbyBabble)

Snub Madonna at your own risk (AgentBedhead)

Julia Roberts, beloved by beyotches (ASocialite’sLife)

Kneel to the disco-tastic glory that is Joan Collins (TheMeatScale)

Pete Doherty is clean, sober, still rather a basketcase (DListed)

Snoop Doggy Dawg is in da menz room! (Mollygood)

Britney kin reed, y’all (INFDaily)

Even Gwyneth Paltrow’s kitchen is perfect (AllieIsWired)

Mandy Moore LOVES the Raffi (BricksAndStones)

Mazel Tov, Drew Carey (Defamer)

Everybody’s pregnant: Lauryn Hill edition (YouhgBlackAndFabulous)

The Inflatable Prince Harry (PerezHilton)

Manolo says, Madonna is the Perfect Mum!

Madonna has been given the all-clear to formally adopt African tot David by the head of Malawi’s Social Services.

The singer, 49, and husband Guy Ritchie played perfect parents to impress Malawi’s chief social welfare officer Simon Chisale, who spent three days as a guest at their 16-bedroom London home.

Afterwards he said he was won over by their domestic bliss – especially when Madonna appeared from the kitchen wearing an apron fresh from baking cakes “looking like a perfect mum”.

The perfect celebrity mother, just like Donna Reed, or Joan Crawford!

Mr Chisale visited over a 72-hour period with Madonna, Guy, 38, and their children Lourdes, 10, Rocco, seven, and two-year-old David.

He saw Madonna’s music studio and Guy’s study and also a special African “zoo room” which she has built to educate her children about David’s continent.

He described the luxury carpets in their home as “like walking on live sheep”.

Madonna spares no expense, beyotches! Live sheep for the carpet! Live pygmies for the Zoo Room!

And he was delighted to find a a butler waiting for him at the front door. He said: “He saluted and said ‘Mr Chisale, I presume’.

“I found Guy in the sitting room. Madonna was in the kitchen. Guy said, ‘The visitor is here!’ Madonna came through wiping her hands with a towel.

Having just slaughtered several wildebeest for David’s culturally appropriate dinner.