Ayyyy!

Danny Bonaduce’s penis needs a PR (Radar)

The personal journals of Angelina Jolie (Dissfunktional)

Julia Roberts, handicapped parking-stealer, paparazzi-attacker (WendyWayrad)

Gene Simmons rocks the dragonskin platform boots (TheMeatScale)

Katie Holmes loses the Posh at the Bambi Awards and no, I’m not making this up (PerezHilton)

Cyndi Lauper goes under the needle (Mollygood)

Prince William still has his girlfriend, most of his hair (JustJared)

Hollywood’s top 10 shocking secrets (CelebSlam)

Posh’s implants bow to gravity, but not much (Egotastic)

Jennifer Love Whoitt engaged (USmagazine)

Gwyneth Paltrow wears Uggs, hangs head in shame (Jezebel)

Jerry Seinfeld’s family troubles (Chicago Sun-Times)

Did Reese and Jake join the Mile High Club? (ShowbizSpy)

Johnny Depp, manorexic, but still purty (ImNotObsessed)

The Curse of Monica Lewinsky (fortunately not a menstruation story) (HolyCandy)

Lilo drinking again, yo (DerekHail)

Ads that work… on Winehouse and Doherty at least (AgentBedhead)

Shocker of the day: KFed wants more money! (EvilBeet)

John Travolta? No way!!! (LARagMag)

Angelina Jolie is coming soon to a barstool near you! (CelebritySmack)

Britney spends time with her kids, ignores them (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Fake Posh … but I repeat myself (AgentBedhead)

Carson Daly is a scary scab (Mollygood)

Steve Carell, master of suave (SplashNewsOnline)

Hayden Panettiere starts a Used Panty club (Defamer)

The Fabio/George Clooney peace talks (Radar)

Kirsten Dunst is Kelly Slater’s latest rent-a-blonde (Dlisted)

Mary-Kate Olsen does the fetal homeless girl look (DrunkenStepfather)

Britney is late, not pregnant (Popsugar)

Britney has a messy house with a not-so-secret sex room (HolyCandy)

Jake Gyllenhaall will play legendary sex symbol Joe Namath (but is there a nude Cosmo spread in the contract? That’s what WE want to know!) (ASocialitesLife)

Becks blogs (PerezHilton)

in rehab news: the Wino Watch begins… (TheMeatScale)

Kelly Osborne grows up, cleans up real good (GoFugYourself)

Johnny Depp gives Vanessa Paradis a punny present (ImNotObsessed)

Thank GOD Paris Hilton prefers pantyhose to stockings (CelebritySmack)

“Didn’t I say we would run out of time to finish my dress if we hand-sewed all the sequins ourselves?” *sulk*

“It’ll be fine Posh, people will just think you had a bit of a wardrobe malfunction - they happen aaallll the time.”

“Oh yeah, right. My dress split down the side because I’m the fat one.” *eyeroll*

“At least she’s got an almost-dress. I don’t even have an almost-pant suit.”

“Look Sporty I did the best I could under the circumstances. If I wasn’t wearing my push-up bra that waiter would never given up his jacket.”  

Chelsy Davy comes to her senses; Prince Harry now off the market again (HolyMoly)

Tom Cruise, skanky old perv? (AgentBedhead)

Boy George vs Ginger Spice, bet on the chick to win (GabbyBabble)

Natalie Portman busts a move (IDontLikeYouInThatWay)

Zac Efron gets posies from photogs (JustJared)

Viggo Alan Poe: quoth the raven, Stallone is directing??? WTF? (TunaFlix)

Mary Kate Olsen shows off her troll hooker style (TheMeatScale)

13 going on 40: the latest Lohan (HolyCandy)

Amy Winehouse fired by tour manager (CrabbiesHollywood)

George Clooney is ready to ride (TMZ)

David Copperfield’s island, reputation sinking (StupidCelebritiesGossip)

A Paltrow grows in Brooklyn (but still looks Protestant) (Mollygood)

Chloe Sevigny for Chloe (DailyStab)

Lohan on the loose! Lock up your sons! (D*anasDirt)

Hard time for Lindsay (WebstersIsMyBiotch)

A surgeon’s thoughts on the Donda West case  (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

Hawt Rainn Wilson and hot Dr. Pepper (Defamer)

Spice Fug (GoFugYourself)

Britney can’t drive with the Federspawn (PerezHilton)

Amy Winehouse is in The Big House (MrTabloid)

Pete Doherty has a big house (AgentBedhead)

Buy Jennifer Aniston’s clothes; you’ll have to get the scowl on your own (ImNotObsessed)

Katie Holmes jumped the queue at the Marathon (HollywoodOffender)

Is Kylie Minogue pulling an Angelina? (HolyMoly)

Rihanna’s wedding boob flash! (CeleBitchy)

Lindsay Lohan does community service (CelebritySmack)

Jessica Simpson fakes it! (Dlisted)

Britney got the fat sucked out of her butt; no word on her head (WOWReport)

Fainting is the new black! (TheRADReport)

Kanye’s mother’s doctor was a quack (PopOnThePop)

The Victoria’s Secret Posse has landed! (Bastardly)

Sarah Michelle Gellar is a porn star (Egotastic)

The Spice Girls are cheap (ASocialitesLife)

Beth Ditto displays that trademark British elegance (HollywoodRag)

Ellen DeGeneris: puppy re-purposer, strikebreaker! (PerezHilton)

Fabio vs Clooney, hunkfight (InTouch)

Stella McCartney vs Heather Mills, bitchfight (GalleryOfTheAbsurd)

Evangeline Lilly and her hobbit are finito (HolyCandy)

Britney Spears is still picking up KFed’s tabs (DerekHail)

Jessica Simpson wants a Boston man (ImNotObsessed)

Jessica Simpson apparently believes Owen Wilson is a Boston man (UsMagazine)

Victoria Beckham on Ugly Betty clip (HolyMoly)

Are Angie and her bodyguard getting physical? (PopBytes)

Dog the Bounty Hunter didn’t know he was white, racist (Celebslam)

Michael Jackson thinks he’s still black (CelebritySmack)

Kate Moss has British teeth (TheMeatScale)

Pete Doherty is stoned again, rehabbing again, sorry again (AgentBedhead)

Matthew McConaughey’s moose knuckle (CityRag)

Britney Spears might be pregnant again! (InCaseYouDidntKnow)

Naked Harry Potter is coming! (GabbyBabble)

It’s not such a small world, after all (AgentBedhead)

Shia LaBeouf, homeless, drunk, and busted (HolyCandy)

World Music Awards: Celine Dion rocks the big hair, small dress combo (ImNotObsessed)

Bad Celebrity Baby Names has a new entrant: Ever Jovovitch Anderson (DailyStab)

Jon Stewart supports strikers (PerezHilton)

Oprah on YouTube! (JustJared)

Angelina Jolie’s Beowulf press conference (CelebritySmack)

Kevin Federline: Evil Genius??? (Yeeeah!)

Nicolas Cage rampage (CityRag)

The Hoff shops (Defamer)

Jessica Simpson, designer. Coco, watch your back! (MollyGood)

New Spice Girls video (DListed)

Cate Blanchett: Perfect, perfectly pregnant (HollywoodOffender)

Christie Brinkley goes uptown, downmarket (GoFugYourself)

Katie Holmesbot obeys! (CelebrityDirtyLaundry)

Backstreet Fuggers (GoFugYourself)

Tom Cruise remembers latest wedding just fine, thank you (I’mNotObsessed)

Hayden Panettiere gets a ring from Milo (CeleBitchy)

Pete Doherty, responsible citizen (People)

Halle Berry has lovely preggo bumps (CelebSlam)

Heidi Klum explains Seal’s appeal (AgentBedhead)

Britney and KFed together again! (DListed)

Carrie Underwood on GMA (DailyStab)

Justin Timberlake is jetlagged, uncommunicative, hawt (SeriouslyOMG)

Paris Hilton wears German panties (wears panties? who knew?) (StupidCelebrities)

Amy Winehouse’s Double Trouble Combo (CelebritySmack)

Amy is a size queen, too! (CelebWarship)

Gretchen Mol gives birth to ancient Egyptian pharaoh (EvilBeet)

Eve, barefaced (Bossip)

Michael Lohan feels blessed by celebrity (PerezHilton)

Larry Craig, “creative financier” (Queerty)

Attention Spice World fans: Announcing Documentary Spice! (JustJared)

The tabloid roundup (Jezebel)

Sorry, it was there. I had to use it.

Larry Craig and the Village People get their groove on! (Disembedded)

Celebrities love Mr. Bones (Jezebel)

Life after Xena for Lucy Lawless (AgentBedhead)

LiLo’s new BF jilted his fiance for her (with bonus mug shot goodness) (CelebritySmack)

Pamela Anderson as: Hooker Bride Barbie! (DailyStab)

Colin Farrell and Natalie Portman do good (GlitteratiGossip)

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, not so good (GoFugYourself)

Donald Trump disses George Clooney and Angelina Jolie. Start the countdown to the assassination (HolyCandy)

LAPD investigates Orlando Bloom’s car crash (I’mNotObsessed)

Raising Suri Cruise by the book: Dianetics (CelebrityDirtyLaundry)

Michael Jackson on Kid Nation? Uh, so to speak. (JustJared)

Hayden Panettiere and Milo Ventimiglia not dating (OK)

Victoria Beckham cracks a smile (PerezHilton)

Kate Moss debuts her Joan Collins tribute collection (MollyGood)

Taye Diggs hotter even when goofy than any man you know (PopSugar)

Ellen DeGeneris releases the hounds (TMZ)

Kimora Lee Simmons, Russell Simmons, their kids, and Djimon Hounsou at the Pumpkin Patch (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Paris Hilton dumps another one (TheRadReport)

Celebrities cheat on their taxes too! (TheJellyfisher)

Debra Messing’s got a new job (Seriously?OMG!WTF?)

but now what excuse will you have for not getting little Cruz that Red Ryder BB Gun he’s always wanted?

Amy Winehouse scalps Romanian orphans (AgentBedhead)

Steve-O for PETA, animal magnetism (CelebritySmack)

Lonelygirl15 @ Pinkberry, Beverley Hills (CelebrityPuke)

Ann Coulter, 46, hacked (DListed)

Stephen Colbert is running for President (EvilBeet)

Diddy, P.Diddy, Puff Daddy, all to be charged with assault (GabbyBabble)

Ellen DeGeneres has a puppy-themed meltdown (Defamer)

JK Rowling bra not-so-much-slip-as-landslide (GoFugYourself)

Jon Voight is heartbroken over Angelina and James (HolyCandy)

Sheryl Crow launches new line (I’mNotObsessed)

LiLo drives the paparazzi wild(er) (PerezHilton)

LOLsen twins (Mollygood)

Jodie Foster will not be contained! (TheMeatScale)

Ebony and Ivory: Mya and Anna Kournikova (YoungBlackAndFabulous)

Spice Girls @ Victoria’s Secret (DailyStab)

Amy Winehouse in the Zoo (Yeeeah)

Jenny from the cell block (GoFugYourself)

The five unsexiest women alive (Maxim)

Kate Moss as the Debbie Harry Zombie (AgentBedhead)

Backstreet’s back! (DailyStab)

Michelle Rodriguez is lost for 180 days (TMZ)

Paris Hilton to annoy Kiefer Sutherland in jail (CelebritySmack)

Britney stands up kids, judge. Again. (I’mNotObsessed)

Penelope Cruz is dating down (HolyCandy)

Angelina Jolie, Jon Voight continue to avoid one another (USWeekly)

Amy Winehouse seeks freedom, fries (GlossLip)

Sarah Jessica Parker covets the scent of superior styling (GalleryOfTheAbsurd)

American Idol’s Corey Clark could be touring the slammer soon (WizbangPop)

Reese Witherspoon works the red carpet without Jake (EvilBeetGossip)

Victoria Beckham’s forehead of pebbly doom (Mollygood)

Famous Hookups: just what it says (FamousHookups)

Ricky Martin rocks the sysadmin look (TheMeatScale)