Ayyyy!

So Princess Eugenie is all, “What? WHAAAAT? Tavi told me it was totally in!”

Prince Felipe of Spain tries his best to make up for the injustice of hereditary monarchy by being really, really ridiculously good-looking.

Andrew Koenig’s body found (TrueSlant)

How to raise a Death Eater (Lolebrity)

Reports of his death have been greatly exaggerated (AgentBedhead)

Paris in the mourning (AmyGrindhouse)

Get a coffin of your own (AllieIsWired)

Charlie Sheen locked up at last (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Canada mourns (BusyBeeBlogger)

John Hamm has a gun in his pocket (AccidentalSexiness)

JSimp slammed for porker faux pas (CeleBitchy)

Whitney Houston died out there (CelebritySmack)

Pickleback slays ‘em (PopEater)

I Believe this is your token happy link (CelebVIPLounge)

Lily Allen passed out, passed over (HolyMoly)

The Return of Mark Kerrigan (EvilBeet)

Johnny Depp is surprised to still be here (DailyStab)

Antonio Banderas turns Unabomber (DListed)

Ashton Kutcher will kill the internet (Towleroad)

Kellan Lutz doesn’t want you to kill puppies! (GabbyBabble)

Blood in the water! (GoFugYourself)

Lady Gaga’s body parts (HaveUHeard)

Matt Damon is a dead man (INeedMyFix)

Time to kill animals! (IBBB)

The death of New Age (LitelySalted)

Jay Leno dances on Conan’s grave (Movieline)

Beautiful Thieves (TenGossip)

Far less beautiful thieves (Heeb)

Craig Ferguson killed his audience (SeriouslyOMG)

These ads will kill your fun (PerezHilton)

Don’t forget to enter the Caption Contest and win fabulous, completely imaginary prizes!

Sure, why not? I bet this will be the bestest blog post about fishing hats of the rich and famous that the world has ever seen. Because there’s a googlewhack if ever I heard one. Note we are not talking about hats made of fish; we’ve already covered those!

Charlie Chaplin in Ireland:

Cuba Gooding Junior, whose dapper felt chapeau does not agree with his funky jams At. All. and someone has to tell him so and it might as well be me:

Click onward to see Winston Churchill, Ernest Hemingway, Barons, Models, and assorted Royalty:

(more…)

I want Daphne Guinness’ Alexander McQueen outfit, and the invisible sword that presumably goes with it. And a moderately-sized vat of gin, STAT; this is a medical emergency. We lost to the US in an Olympic hockey game for the first time since 1960, and all of Canada is in bed, drunk and sobbing and holding on to it’s little Troll doll for dear life; all of Canada except me. Someone has to blog this pain away. I am in no mood to be trifled with, except perhaps by Hugh Jackman, and he should wear body armour just to be safe.

Alfred Hitchcock’s ultimate nightmare (Lolebrity)

Robert Pattinson is greased and ready! (AgentBedhead)

Jessica Simpson gets her mask on (AmyGrindhouse)

Jude Law, swordsman (BusyBeeBlogger)

Travis Barker’s boxing match aborted (CelebritySmack)

JLo misses hat trick (CeleBitchy)

Bag a king! (True/Slant)

Conan hits the road (DailyStab)

Dancesport according to Dita (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Hilary Duff teams with NHL Player (BricksAndStones)

Kate Moss, suited for action (DanasDirt)

Bigots! On! Ice! (Gawker)

Ice escapades with Johnny Weir (DListed)

Xtream Martial Arts Birthday Party? (EvilBeet)

The Champions! (INeedMyFix)

Ken Paves wins the Snatch and Grab (SeriouslyOMG)

The pairs event (UKPopSugar)

Here we see heir to the British Throne His Royal Highness Prince Charles Philip Arthur George, Prince of Wales, KG, KT, GCB, OM, AK, QSO, PC, ADC, Earl of Chester, Duke of Cornwall, Duke of Rothesay, Earl of Carrick, Baron of Renfrew, Lord of the Isles and Prince and Great Steward of Scotland presenting medals to soldiers of the famed and historic Black Watch. Which points up two things:

one, that the Black Watch has abandoned the wearing of Black Watch, and

two, that if we can see him the camo doesn’t work very well!

Which reminds me of the time I was walking down The Drive and saw this guy dressed head to toe in camo. Camo shoes, pants, jacket, tee, hat, and backpack. I deliberately bumped into him and said, “Oh, sorry. I didn’t see you.”

He didn’t get it.

The Revenge of Coco (Gawker)

Quentin Tarantino to helm Conan flick (AgentBedhead)

Neil Patrick Harris shares a touching moment with Mickey Rourke (Lolebrity)

Old Friends (AmyGrindhouse)

Sig Hell! (BusyBeeBlogger)

Putting the “Brit” in Britney (CeleBitchy)

Finally, someone impresses Simon Cowell (CelebritySmack)

Golden gobs (HolyCandy)

Angel Falls to Earth (this is not a repeat from Paradise Lost) (INeedMyFix)

Hilary Duff, Garbo impersonator (JustJared)

Ice this old qualifies as glacial, no? (UKPopSugar)

Not enough Cthulhu! (Movieline)

The Cupcake of Doom (Crunk&Disorderly)

Lindsay Lohan embarks on a new career (DListed)

Martha Stewart goes pole hog (EvilBeet)

Jay, even the angry lesbians are against you now. Surrender before you get maimed (GabbyBabble)

Re-assemble your celebrity (INO)

Mr. Seizler gets schooled by HSH Princess Stephanie of Monaco at the 34th International Circus Festival in Monte-Carlo.

Later that night after the obligatory Champagne, audience members found themselves asking themselves ou sont les pink elephants d’antan?

Oh, hang on. I think I remember that movie.

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• Guess The Royal Daughter (PHOTO) (huffingtonpost.com)

Everyone knows the Red Queen’s had a bit of work done, sure. But did you know she’s been at the forefront of celebrity fashion trends for more than a century?

First up, our “vintage” contest featuring Prince Harry.

el smrtmnky Says:
October 11th, 2009 at 7:12 pm

Lindsay Lohan goes full lesbian

Congrats and imaginary swag to first-time winner el smrtmnky. To celebrate his victory, we hypothetically award him with a digital, downloadable copy of the crown jewels:

Sadly, these ones belong to Charles. Not quite the same, I know.

And our second contest winner, featuring far more of Mariah Carey than I ever wanted to see:

gemdiva Says:
November 7th, 2009 at 9:27 pm
What do you mean I’m voted off the island!? I just got here.

What shall we award our returning champion? How about something with a little more flattering coverage than Mariah’s outfit?Like this snazzy shalwar kameez

…one’s guest wears the same colour as one’s imperial sash. One wishes to sneak out the back and change, if not for one’s consort drawing attention by shamelessly mugging for one’s paparazzi.

Do you best/worst in the comments section as you caption His Royal Highness The Ginger Kid here leaving a nightclub at three in the morning.

Without me. *sob*

And we don’t even have an affiliate deal with Barefoot Wines. Still. Num.

Join the Bloggerati (TeenyManolo)

Parisian snobbery (AgentBedhead)

Mean Girl is mean (AmyGrindhouse)

Bill Gates is no Steve Jobs (BWE)

Steve Jobs is no Bill Gates (Stanford.Edu)

Even Jennifer Aniston finds Jennifer Aniston’s lovelife laughable (BBB)

Pantyhose for Twilight freaks (LaughingStork)

Party for the Congo! (CeleBitchy)

John Mayer stages publicity stunt for dude who REALLY needs publicity (CelebritySmack)

Nikki Cox Mohr or Less (CelebuWreck)

St. Brangelina strikes again (DailyStab)

Meet NYC’s first married gays (Gawker)

Uncle Karl prowls the depths of Hell (DListed)

Happy Pre-Celebrity Father’s Day (EvilBeet)

Who (the Hell)’s That Girl? (GoFugYourself)

British Beef=Mad Cow Disease? (GabbyBabble)

Russell Brand is a hairy situation (INO)

Curb your enthusiasm (JJ)

Royals on parade (UKPopSugar)

Pushing Daisies goes six feet under (SeriouslyOMG)

RPattz’s new moon (TenGossip)