Ayyyy!

La Toya Jacksanity (SeriouslyOMG)

Nicolette Sheridan exudes fabulousness (Celebslam)

America’s next top freak (IBBB)

Madonna Global Media Domination Tour (JensJuice)

Tom Cruise loses his Packer (AgentBedhead)

Ginger Spice and the Goth Lesbian of Doom (ImNotObsessed)

Britney Spears and Big Sur (DailyStab)

Play the Celebrity Cosmetic Surgery Game! (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

Daydream Believer in the magic of Davy Jones Karaoke (Defamer)

Amy Winehouse is a commuter’s worst nightmare (CelebritySmack)

Pot/Kettle Pot/Potkettle What I mean to say is Ashlee/Britney (CeleBitchy)

Uma Thurman’s lawyer will butt-rape France (InTouch)

Mariah and Mr Mariah have been inseparable since marrying last week. Uh, thanks for that, PR machine (PopSugar)

Beverly Hills Chihuahua! (DListed)

Happy Birthday, Cougarman! George Clooney is 47 (ImNotObesessed)

Would you be the filling in an Owen Wilson/Vince Vaughn sandwich? (CelebrityDirt)

Attack of the Slash! (TheRadReport)

Dustin Hoffman farts in Tom Cruise’s general direction (HolyMoly)

Karl Lagerfeld and Anna Wintour’s dream date (CandyKirby)

Ashley Olsen is no Elizabeth Hurley; Mary-Kate is no Joey Heatherton (Websters)

Uma Thurman’s stalker is a man of convictions. Felony convictions (GabbyBabble)

Pete Doherty on the loose! Lock up your crack! (SeriouslyOMG)

Mister Amy Winehouse may not be entirely respectable (TheSun)

Kate Moss in bondage, lingerie, matrimony, and gainful employment (AgentBedhead)

La Lohan is light-fingered (TheBlemish)

Ant-Man rides the Iron Man’s shiny coattails to new movie deal (Defamer)

Heath Ledger dolls selling like mad (Gawker)

Mariah Carey may have a brain under that weave: she got a prenup (CeleBitchy)

It’s SIR Kylie now! (UKPopSugar)

Beck is back, bitches! (PerezHilton)

Amy Winehouse’s brain makes a break for it, digging escape hatch now (CelebritySmack)

The Chronicles of Narnia, live at Barnes & Noble (JustJared)

Oprah’s critics pick wrong target (Bossip)

Shia LaBoeufcake is horny! (Towleroad)

Clay Aiken is saving himself…forever! (Defamer)

Julie Newmar is Cougarwoman! (Copyranter)

Speaking of Catwoman, Sean Young’s drunken tirade earns her a one-way ticket to rehab (Dlisted)

Craig, Daniel Craig, defends new Bond flick (AgentBedhead)

Ricci, Christina Ricci is groped by an ape (CelebritySmack)

The economics of Amy Winehouse (Derober)

Thank you, Jesus! It’s Viggo Mortensen! (TheMeatScale)

Britney Spears blah blah crazy blah blah paparazzi blah… (IDLYITW)

Ali Larter and the Chocolate Suite of Diet Doom (DailyStab)

Spice and Nice (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Gwen Stefani: baby on board! (CelebrityDirtyLaundry)

Lindsay Lohan is on and off the wagon like a pioneer with a weak bladder (CeleBitchy)

Eva Longoria uses dead people to hook up with George Clooney? (People)

Con artist poses as Heath Ledger’s dad (NYP)

Sandra Oh, explained (GoFugYourself)

Adrian Grenier’s nuts! (HolyCandy)

Nicole Richie is tiny again, caffeinated again (ImNotObsessed)

Presenting: Britney Spears in Alfred Hitchcock’s The Paparazzi (GalleryOfTheAbsurd)

Yes, Uma Thurman is, in fact, perfect (Egotastic)

Miley Ray Cyrus is legal in at least ONE way now (Mollygood)

Verne “Mini Me” Troyer ambushed by accusatory paparazzo (PerezHilton)

Crispin “Rat Catching” Glover’s ex takes to YouTube for some teary vengence (Gawker)

Drew “He’s My Best Friend” Barrymore is fully Mac Guy compatible (WebstersIsMyBitch)

John Edwards’ love child rumors (ASocialitesLife)

Jennifer Aniston shacked up, not knocked up (yet) (ImNotObsessed)

Larry Birkhead is not done bottom fishing! He’s Britney’s #1 fan! (InTouch)

Nicole Kidman’s children call Katie Holmes “Mom” (EvilBeet)

Michael J. Fox is still the perfect man (CeleBitchy)

Pete Doherty is exactly 26.2 miles from reality (AgentBedhead)

The Eighties are back! and the Landers sisters have them! (DListed)

Sienna Miller has hairy fetlocks (TheMeatScale)

If grandma’s knitted mitts are good enough for Uma Thurman, they’re good enough for you (GoFugYourself)

They’ve just named the latest Bond girl, and no, you’ve never heard of her (DailyStab)

Jamie-LynnGate roundup (HolyCandy)

Tyra Banks, Scrooge of showbiz? (JanetCharletonsHollywood)

Why Liza fell (PerezHilton)

Christina Ricci talks about anorexia (CelebrityDirtyLaundry)

Matt Damon’s beautiful gal (JustJared)

Does Lindsay Lohan have a girl friend with benefits? (Defamer)

Demi Moore’s 2000 pounds of silicone (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

Jessica Biel is womanhandled (HolyCandy)

Mischa Barton shows her Sapphic side, too (DailyStab)

Britney loses visitation rights (TMZ)

Owen Wilson off the smack, on the Patron Silver (CelebritySmack)

Lindsay’s got a ring on her finger! (EvilBeet)

RIP Deborah Kerr: An Actress to Remember (GabbyBabble)

Norwegian wouldn’t: Amy Winehouse arrested in Bergen (HolyMoly)

The Michael Jackson/Teri Hatcher convertible Halloween mask (Defamer)

Joely Richardson makes Karen Carpenter look chubby (DailyMail)

Uma Thurman steals Britney’s look (HollywoodTuna)

Ben Affleck is gone, baby, gone (Mollygood)

Celebrity Moms on Parade: Jennifer Garner, Katie Holmes, Angelina Jolie, Julianne Moore, Maggie Gyllenhaal (yes, that’s her!!) and Kate Winslet (I’mNotObsessed)

Alice Evans in costume as The Widow Cobain (GoFugYourself)

David Beckham is ready to play the field (ASocialite’sLife)

Last remaining Rat Packer packs it in (WOWReport)

Looks like we’ve stumbled into an awkward moment of Uma stomping off in a huff with some guy in tow, away from her billionaire boyfriend Arpad “Arkie” Busson (not pictured).

Don’t be a tightass Arkie - if she wants to dart about and pick the pockets of her fellow diners at Cipriani’s, then let her have at it. It’s not as if you can’t afford to reimburse them.