We’ve been at it for several minutes now and he’s creeping me out big time.  Who keeps their eyes open when making out?!?! And can we get a little saliva action in there please? It’s like rubbing my lips against sandpaper.

Can’t…breathe…must…decide! Death or Travolta’s tongue?  Death or Travolta’s tongue? Death or Travolta’s tongue?

Yes, even most skilful of photoshop effects cannot conceal Jude’s smarminess, and Jennifer Aniston’s pic was barely retouched. The rest were a bit more difficult, but a fine effort on your part in getting most of them right. Now that order is restored, we shall return to distorting celebrity facts instead.

Heather Mills is the Wicked Witch of the Wasteland (AgentBedhead)

Monster Thriller Horror Celebrity Roundup (HolyCandy)

Britney’s Party in the Potty (CelebritySmack)

Is Angelina preggo? (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Lane Garrison about to get 3 years experience working the orange jumpsuit (Dlisted)

Frankenbust! (CityRag)

Jon Bon Jovi has more street cred than we ever dreamed (DailyStab)

Lance Armstrong and an Olsen??? (I’mNotObsessed)

Britney’s lawyers handle “all that stuff” ie the kids (PopSugar)

When Pierce Brosnan attacks! (NinjaDude)

RIP, Robert Goulet (PinkIsTheNewBlog)

Michael Jackson haunts Brooklyn (MollyGood)

Lindsay Lohan bails on New Year’s bash (Yeeeah)

Happy Halloween! Your kid looks slutty! (CeleBitchy)

The View goes all-transvestite for Halloween! (Defamer)

Where the distorted faces of the once-pretty mock your every attempt to escape back into the land of celebrities with attractive bone structure.  Please, I invite you to figure out who lies beneath (or go barking mad trying to do so).

Manolo says, featuring the highest Bollywood production values and the most amusing lyrics you will ever see.