Cut that out!

Sandra Bullock and Melissa McCarthy on the red carpet

Sandra Bullock and Melissa McCarthy on the red carpet

Okay, if there’s anybody that doesn’t love these two, you may now close the blog and go back to, I dunno, Brittle Hipster Menthol Snobbery Blog or what-have-you. Now that I’ve got it straight that their new movie is not a sequel to the Robert DeNiro Heat, I’m all the more eager to see it.

And can we just stop for a moment and admire the way Sandy is absolutely nailing it here, fashion-wise? From the tips of her black pedicure to the strappy sandals to the cut out leather dress which signals Badassery and also the ability to wear a cut out leather dress in one’s forties to the unfussy, beachy hair, Sandra Bullock is owning it.

Which makes it my sad duty to say that Melissa is, unfortunately, not owning it. She ain’t even renting it. There is “easy” but then there is “shapeless.” And the scrolldown fug, Oh My God! If they were palazzo pants I might almost forgive this thing, with its tacky cheap zipper that won’t stay in place, its no-neckline neckline, and it’s revolting cupping of the tummy. But noooooo! The one place this thing is tight where it’s supposed to be tight is just where it shouldn’t be. It draws the eye to those awful $45-Payless-looking platforms and frankly make her look like she’s going to tip over any second. Unbalanced is the word for this look. The fabric seems nice, and the color is good on her if not amazing, but it doesn’t fit, and if it did fit it would still look damn awkward. Melissa, there are going to be a lot of red carpets in your future, and this ain’t your first time out at this particular rodeo. “Knockoff Norma Kamali” is not your look; learn this now.

4 Responses to “Cut that out!”

  1. Katharine July 5, 2013 at 3:27 am #

    I wanna look as good as Sandra. I want that entire outfit!!!

    As for Melissa – yeah… Whoever told her “You look great!” Should be up for an Oscar.

  2. Ida July 5, 2013 at 3:33 am #

    Nice bit of fat shaming there. Not to be flouncy, but I see a mean streak in your last few posts that I really don’t care for. If you’re attempting to do a Fug girls tyope thing, you’re missing the target. Critizise the clothes, not the body. I’m unfollowing you. Bye!

  3. fotoeins | Henry July 5, 2013 at 3:53 pm #

    Melissa’s character tears an awesome fearsome blue streak of profanity in this buddy-cop movie. That alone might be worth the price of admission.

  4. raincoaster July 25, 2013 at 5:22 am #

    Ida, you seem touchy. Have an iced tea and settle down, dear. I didn’t say anything about Melissa’s size, nor Sandy’s. I talked about the fit, the colour, the cut, the silhouette, that heinous zipper, and the shoes. You could shrink her and that hideous wrap down to a size zero and it wouldn’t be any more attractive. This has nothing to do with size: that outfit wouldn’t work at any size, because it is an awful outfit. And if you follow the link, you’ll see she can do so much better, and usually does.