Ayyyy!

Okay gang, what’s got Courtney Love in such a puzzlement? Seriously, what on Planet Earth hasn’t she seen before? Put your guesses in the comments section; best caption wins fabulous, imaginary prizes, as always.

We’ll announce the winner of last week’s Norwegian Curling Pants challenge tomorrow, so you’ve got a few hours left to enter.

This is not actually Bruges, this is Paris, and the arrival of Clemence Poesie at the Balenciaga show. I know nobody here knows who she is, but she was awesome in the terrific, tragicomic Colin Farrell film In Bruges and should be thought of as the Euro Claire Danes, only without the homewrecking part. And as these pictures show, she’s mastered the “innocent schoolgirl” look, at a cost of no more than, say, $15,000 or so. I may be twice her age, but I’d like to think for that price I could look like an innocent French schoolgirl, too.

PS: I’m stealing the hat! That’s why in most of the shots from that day she’s holding it on tightly; I’m just out of frame, with one of those ACME pincers-on-tongs contraptions I use when out stealing hats from celebrities.

Remember Ivana Trump? She once said, “I don’t intend to look a day over thirty, but it’s going to cost The Donald a lot of money!” Let’s see how she succeeded at that:

So, on the one hand: Honey, No. On the other hand, Respect; she really hasn’t changed a bit!

1987. Yes, 1987.

It’s just not fair: as Mylene Farmer proves, sexy, elegant French chanteuses can look sexy, elegant, French and chanteuserrific even while falling flat on their faces.

And now for a few words from sexy, elegant French chanteuserati Mylene Farmer and Vanessa Paradis: Um, Mylene is so French she may in fact be NSFW unless you work at Playboy, so you’re warned. Vanessa is of course wholesomeness itself in corporeal form; how else do you think she snared Johnny Depp, eh?

Mylene:

Vanessa:

Okay, Sven Kramer, my imaginary boyfriend, you may have gotten the gold for the fastest skater and the gold for the purtiest Olympian other than Johnny “Fierce” Weir, but I’m still saying the Russian in the back there wins the platinum medal in the fashion Olympics. Don’t nobody look their best in orange. Not even you:

And seriously; ankle socks?

Lindsay Lohan airs it out (Lolebrity)

Lara vs Leia (AgentBedhead)

Elvis Pattinson immortalized (AmyGrindhouse)

Clive Owen steals some poor girl’s jacket (BusyBeeBlogger)

and she wonders why she doesn’t have any friends (INeedMyFix)

Gilligan’s Island of the Living Dead (CelebritySmack)

Lohan throwdown (AllieIsWired)

Lilo on the down low (HolyMoly)

Flying Tomato peels! (DailyStab)

The family that tases together, stayses together (GabbyBabble)

Betcha can’t fug just one (GoFugYourself)

Someone please give Sarah Palin a real job (Gawker)

Marcia, Marcia, Marcia! (EvilBeet)

Giantess free to attack again! (CelebDirtyLaundry)

These tourists are SO much prettier than ours (HaveUHeard)

Fran Drescher Fission! (IBBB)

There’s a thin line… (LitelySalted)

Moon, June, Spoon, Gay PrOn? (Movieline)

We like JLo’s Hue (TenGossip)

Bride of Freakenstein (PopBytes)

Well THIS should get a telethon (DListed)

Remember … to SMILE, dummy (UKPopSugar)

Jane Fonda shouldn’ta blogged it! (CelebCosmeticSurgery)

I’m sorry, Lapo. You know I love you, darling, but the Mad Scientist Whose Arms from the Elbow Down Are Reliving That Summer After Grad When We Did Shrooms at Burning Man look is just not working for you.

Yes, it’s William Shatner’s world. We only dwell in it.

Bob Crane most certainly DID! (Lolebrity)

L.Ron is at it again (AgentBedhead)

Leno’s Monologue (AmyGrindhouse)

Leno’s Monologue reviewed (DrunkHulk)

Lesbian liplock lost! (BusyBeeBlogger)

Lions, lambs, Robert Pattison, and Betty White in a tree (CeleBitchy)

Love vs Lily (EvilBeet)

Lyrical magic (DListed)

Lucas to destroy Scientology (Gawker)

Ladies swing free (DailyStab)

La Lauper at Launch (CelebritySmack)

Lady Gaga hangs loose (CelebDirtyLaundry)

LoHew still employed (GabbyBabble)

Life of a teenage fug queen (GoFugYourself)

Love, vampire style (INeedMyFix)

Laverne without Shirley (IBBB)

Lads Own World (LitelySalted)

Legion of Twitterati (Movieline)

…you should have worn it instead of these ones, Chani:

And up top? Totally 80’s Night:

You’ll recall our stunning view from last week:

ian in hamburg Says:
February 22nd, 2010 at 12:31 pm

Lack of snow due to warm weather forces Olympic officials to truck in tons of cocaine.

Congratulations and imaginary swag to first-time winner ian. Naturally, the imaginary prize must be up to the same tasteful standard. Here, how about a fabulous room of mirrors to go with that mountain of coke?