RIP Phyllis Diller

Phyllis Diller

Phyllis Diller

If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door greet him with, “Who could have done this? We have no enemies.”

Phyllis Diller

As they say on Tumblr, GPOY.

Phyllis Diller is my spirit animal, and now that she’s gone to meet her maker (he’s SCARED and he’s getting out the good cocktail glasses) the world is a duller place. It is even a less stylish place.

Gaga, Keshia, and Nicki Minaj are just going to have to find someone else to rip off.

Phyllis Diller tiptoes through the tulips

Phyllis Diller tiptoes through the tulips

There is no neck, however heinous, that cannot be improved upon by an enormous collar of plastic beads.

Phyllis Diller before and after

Phyllis Diller before and after

When in doubt, add eyelashes. And rhinestones, in case the eyelashes feel conspicuous.

Phyllis Diller's hair raising situation

Phyllis Diller’s hair raising situation

I don’t know what the question was, but the answer was obviously “VOLUME!”

Phyllis Diller vs Hairdressers

Phyllis Diller vs Hairdressers

You can hardly blame them for putting a price on her head. At least, parts of it.

Phyllis Diller was an American Rose

Phyllis Diller was an American Rose

How I wish I could have found a recording of her singing The Rose, but as a consolation prize here she is singing her theme song, “(I can’t get no) Satisfaction). Yes, really.

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