Ayyyy!

At last we learn the backstory to the shot herd ’round the world. Oh Snoop, we’ve all been there.

Claire Danes knows how to work a trenchcoat (Lolebrity)

Celebrities! They’re not like us! They can walk in these shoes! (CelebToast)

The best 404 message online (AgentBedhead)

Om Nom Nom WHA???? (AllieIsWired)

Brittany Murphy, Casey Johnson, Basic Health Rules laid to rest (AmyGrindhouse)

Demon in sheep’s clothing (BWE)

Anne Hathaway flips the bird (BricksAndStones)

Alexis for Alexis! (BusyBeeBlogger)

Ooh La Little Girl Lingerie? (LaughingStork)

Kate, I think you dropped something (HolyMoly)

Sandra Bullock will cut a bitch (LitelySalted)

Forget Mischa Barton, try Carole Channing! (LaineyGossip)

Kristen Stewart in court for prostitution (TMZ)

Ralph Lauren snubs in public! (CelebrityMound)

Ellen for President? (CelebrityDirtyLaundry)

Tom Brady’s 2-month-old can run??? (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Oooh, ACDC MUST DIE!!!! (CeleBitchy)

Jay-Qui? (CelebrityVIPLounge)

Possibly the most terrifying headline I’ve ever read (CelebritySmack)

Kanye survives horrifying ordeal (CelebSlam)

Bublé’s bongo bowl (CityRag)

Dennis Quaid’s farmer’s tan (CrazyDaysAndNights)

The Real BabyMamas of Atlanta (Crunk+Disorderly)

Brangelina lives! (DailyStab)

Paris has gone to the dogs (DanasDirt)

Nicknames of the literati (Gawker)

The return of PuppyBowl (DListed)

Betty White is terrifying (EvilBeet)

Small Wonder it was cancelled (FourFour)

Janet Jackson is a Janet Jackson impersonator (GabbyBabble)

Best Dressed/Worst Dressed at the Grammys (GoFugYourself)

Snooki’s makeover (ImBringingBloggingBack)

Qween no longer on Scene (INeedMyFix)

How Hugh Jackman rolls (HaveUHeard)

World’s most expensive benchwarmers (HollywoodBackwash)

Flack pointedly does NOT deny Paris Hilton is dumb (HollywoodRag)

Sniff Beyonce for $50 (HollywoodTuna)

KFat achieves self-awareness (ImNotObsessed)

Leif Garrett busted NOT A FLASHBACK TO 1975 (Janet CharltonsHollywood)

Virgins versus Texting! (JustJared)

PETA vs Avatar (Movieline)

Jessica Biel definitely not Jewish (FitCeleb)

Frances Bean taking singing lessons (PerezHilton)

Stock Anderson Cooper Adorable Story (PinkIsTheNewBlog)

Russell Brand shoots, scores (UKPopSugar)

Jamaican Bobsled Team not so cool (WizBangPop)

Orlando Bloom is all wet (PopBytes)

Kelly Clarkson in flamewar (RadarOnline)

Re-Enchanted (SeriouslyOMG)

Tila says the butler didn’t do it (ASocialiteLife)

Conan O’Brien’s Valentine to Britney (SquareEyes)

Saffy, darling, are you slumming in this movie? (TenGossip)

John Mayer needs to take off the Wayfarers (TheBosh)

Mischa Barton wins Best Supporting Hose (TheSkinny)

Pomtinis count as a serving of fruit, you know. They’re full of antioxidants, so down a couple as you surf the gossip links tonight and work on your alibi.

WiNo-No strikes again? (AmyGrindhouse)

Is someone trying to kill Robert Downey Jr? (SeriouslyOMG)

What does Kate Moss have to do to get arrested in this town? (AgentBedhead)

When Pink finds out, Brandon Davis is gonna need protective custody (CeleBitchy)

William Balfour arrested for Hudson family murders (SocialiteLife)

David Spade needs a good lawyer (Celebslam)

The criminal truth of Tina Fey’s scar (CelebWarship)

Lindsay Lohan = Eddie Gein? (AllieIsWired)

American Express hates America (CelebuWreck)

Immortals team up for concert (CelebritySmack)

Criminal panty lines, Beyonce! (POTP)

Someone wants Simon Cowell bad enough to break the law (GabbyBabble)

Michael Phelps has mastered the George Clooney m. o. (DailyStab)

Lindsay Lohan has a Facebook impersonator: Lindsay Lohan? (EvilBeet)

Liveblogging Fake Karl by Dead Yves (FakeKarl)

False advertising! (CandyKirby)

Fun with Spam (IBBB)

Shia finally makes his Mom happy, becomes a lawyer (JustJared)

Giant douche can’t even manage to shoot himself in the foot (Mollygood)

Some criminal hairdos at the BAFTAs (UKPopsugar)

Save Canada! (OMG)

Marc Jacobs, necrophiliac? (Towleroad)

Your shirtless unicorn chaser (Defamer)

You know that blooming tea stuff? It looks strangely familiar…

Jennifer Aniston attempts to make up for lost time? (GabbyBabble)

Remember, Remember the 5th of November (GuidoFawkes)

Biggest casting against type since Darryl Hannah played an astrophysicist in Roxanne (AgentBedhead)

Not Gut! Steve Guttenberg is a flasher (CelebritySmack)

The fats of life: Janet Jackson’s diet book cancelled (HolyMoly)

Blaaaaaaaake, Incarcerated…in rehab (DailyStab)

Fun with celebrity holograms! (BestWeekEver)

Hologram-O-rama (Defamer)

RIP Michael Crichton (MomLogic)

Marilyn Manson is single again, girls! (DListed)

Matthew McConaughey is singlehandedly bringing trailer trash back (CeleBitchy)

Paris Hilton would overdress for the opening of an envelope (CelebWarship)

The world is ending, but the afterparty has begun! (IBBB)

Ashlee Simpson is Chuck Barry’s dream girl? (CandyKirby)

Anna Wintour birthday fanfic (GoFugYourself)

Prince Harry, charity hottie (UKPopSugar)

What did Vegas do to deserve this? (Websters)

Ryan Seacrest takes his best shot (SeriouslyOMG)

Oprah puts Tom Cruise’s foot in her mouth (AgentBedhead)

Air Sex CSI? (CandyKirby)

The secret shame of Michael Phelps (DListed)

Phoebie Price wins one! (CeleBitchy)

Shanna Moakler speaks out about the plane crash (CelebritySmack)

Meet the LizardMan! (CelebrityCosmeticSurgery)

The award for best pop video of all time goes to… (DailyStab)

Richest Congressmen (Jossip)

Does Simon Cowell make you randy, baby? (ImNotObsessed)

Top five Emmy quotes (PopSugar)

Gwyneth Paltrow cooks all her own food, employs macrobiotic chef presumably just to keep him off welfare (JustJared)

Josh Groban: laughingstock or genius? (Defamer)

Anderson Cooper’s secret drag show cabaret shame (Gawker)

ZOMG Perez Hilton has a ghostwriter??? (EvilBeet)

The Jamie Lynn Spears porn investigation is NOT what you think (CelebrityBabyScoop)

VOTE CLORIS!!!!! (SeriouslyOMG)

Jeremy Piven bites the hand that feeds (GabbyBabble)

The David Beckham Beefcake Calendar for 2009! (PopBytes)

Matthew McConaughey rolls wit his posse (Lolebrity)

Truth (and methane) in advertising (AgentBedhead)

The Grey Fox vs La Vida Lohan (ItsCandyTV)

Jackie Chan can chop my sockey anytime (CelebrityDirt)

80’s celebrity flashbacks! (CelebritySmack)

Britney Spears Faster, Pussycat, Kill, Kill rumours killt (DailyStab)

Katie Holmes gets the hottest men in uniform (CandyKirby)

First glimpses of Nicole Kidman’s lumpy baby blanket (SeriouslyOMG)

Kate Hudson photoshopped to the point of vampirism (AllieIsWired)

Vastly pregnant Gwen Stefani visits the hospital (PopSugar)

Lohan and Ronson get matching “white trash eternity rings” (CeleBitchy)

Trixie Belden and the Case of the Mormon Sex Slave Dog Cloner (Dlisted)

Megan Fox brings her quiet dignity to playing a porny Mother Theresa (Defamer)

New Jersey celebrates its famous crabs (BestWeekEver)

Lisa Suedrow (ICYDK)

Petra Nemcova does her Eddie Munster impression (Yeeeeah)

Ashley Kaufman can has dysfunctional famlee, recording contract? (Lolebrity)

Heidi Fleiss, failed madam, successful reality show star (WOWReport)

A-Rod behaving like a free agent (WebstersIsMyBitch)

Is this a musical which I see before me,
The Beckhams the subject? Come, David, let me clutch thee;
I have thee not, and yet I see thee still. (SeriouslyOMG)

Jake Gyllenhaal is a swordsman (ASL)

The pregnant woman/man gives birth (LilSugar)

England hates America: REVOLT! (Radar)

Jay-Z keeps slaves? (PerezHilton)

Chris Martin: a boob saved by boobies (Mollygood)

Anderson Cooper is in the Advocate and he doesn’t care who knows it (PinkIsTheNewBlog)

Jack Black stole his mom’s stash (ImNotObsessed)

Chace Crawford hearts the cougars (JustJared)

What not to wear…LIVE! (GoFugYourself)

Relive the Rave! (FourFour)

Christie Brinkley will soon be free of that creep (DListed)

Lindsay Lohan beats the odds, makes it to 22 (Defamer)

Matt Damon no longer sexiest man alive (DailyStab)

Coming soon: a mysterious poisoning in Afghanistan (Crunk&Disorderly)

Shockingly, Katie Holmes fails to sell more than a million dollars in tickets (AgentBedhead)

So now we know that Anderson Cooper has a type – big-nosed, googly-eyed, falsetto-voiced, petite redheads who have a great way with children.  I bet there was a whole lot of tickling happening in the back of the limo on the way home that night.

Robert Downey Jr is a cunning linguist (Jossip)

Amy Winehouse doesn’t have a leg to stand on, almost (WendyWayrad)

NKOTB are miracle workers! (AgentBedhead)

Lindsay Lohan parties with fellow leggings abuser (DailyStab)

Simon Cowell and Ryan Seacrest’s Tryst night (DListed)

Ellen Page (1 nomination, 0 Oscars) severely disses Jane Fonda (6 nominations, 2 Oscars) (Defamer)

Courtney Love’s purse pharmacy (Yeeeeah)

Jeri Ryan Seacrest, Pamela Anderson Cooper, and Boy George Bush (PrettyOnTheOutside)

Disney Superstar goes naked Down Under (CircusHour)

74 reasons to hate TMZ (Gawker)

More than you needed to know about Roseanne Barr’s ladyparts (CelebritySmack)

Doogie Howser hates Britney Spears (WebstersIsMyBitch)

Jamie-Lynn Spears hurt in drunken brawl (CeleBitchy)

Gangland rumbles reach new low: nursery school (Bossip)

Aging Canadian surgical curiosity and sex cougar invited to White House (ICYDK)

Simon Cowell haunts Maternity wards to bathe his skin in life-giving placenta (HollywoodRag)

Halle Berry is a golf fanatic? (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Your dose of downer: Celebrity incomes (HuffPo)

Posh Spice and the Adams family (JustJared)